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decisions, decisions.
13/f
my mom won't let me make my own decisions. I realise that if I screw things up, it'll be my fault & I'll have to suffer my own consequences. My mom explained that whole thing to me and I said I was willing to do that, but then at the end she's all like "ah I'm still not letting you. that was hipathetical" and I'm like WTF.
She thinks that I'll get pregnant or have sex or do drugs. and I already told her that i'm not stupid & i won't do that. All I want to do is go over my boyfriends house, and i'm not even allowed to do that. My boyfriend has been over my house every single time. Now my boyfriend is mad at me because I'm never with him, and everytime we're over my house we're being watched over like a hawk.
I know I'm only 13 but i'm not stupid. And everyone else is allowed to be with boys. I'm even interested in having sex, and my mom says that all boys this age are. Even if it's true, he won't be anywhere near me. My mom is ruining every single relationship I have.
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You can't blame her for caring.
Actually....You can. But that would be selfish and quite frankly, rather bitchy.
I think you should sit down and have a looooong, serious chat with your mom.
My mother and I have this deal going, if I'm still a virgin by the time I graduate, have never taken any drugs or been taken in by the cops, etc. then she'll pay for my University tuition.
If I'm not a virgin and/or have taken drugs, yadda yadda yadda, then I'll pretty much be disowned.
But try discussing a similar thing with your mother, and put it in writing. I have the signed contract (Written on an old shopping list) somewhere in my drawers.
And as for your boyfriend, explain the situation to him. If he really cares about you, he'll understand. If he really does just want you for sex, or just doesn't care or whatever, then it'll be obvious in his reaction.
In which case, you should drop him like a hot cake.
-Leah
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first yes, kudos to your mom, better over protective than none at all believe it or not. 2nd, you say your not stupid and would not be pushed into sex, i believe you. now you have to show your mom that you are smart and responsible. to do that take on more responsibility. clean up after yourself, and the household, be helpful if there are animals or younger siblings help out with them as well. when your boyfriend comes over if your family is in the kitchen, ask if you and he can watch some tv or talk in the living room, if thier in the living room ask if you two can go sit in the kitchen and talk. either way the minute you two are alone use the oppurtunity TO PROVE YOUR RESPONSIBLE! if theres a door seperating you guys from the family, open it, and act grown up about it. no more whining or complaining. talk to your mom again in a couple months and tell her you feel that you have really started to be more responsible, and i was hoping that in time you could learn to trust me more. start small, ask permission to take walks around the block with your boyfriend. work your way up and all the while keep up with your chores and schoolwork, and help your mom any way you can. and im not advising this to make you work your but off, but the fact remains your young, if you want to be treated like an adult you must first act like one.
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well you MIGHT need a LITTLE space but i think your mom is only trying to protect you.I respect your mom so much for that because other moms give their kids a little TOO much freedom and they end up getting sexually transmitted diseases and addicted to drugs.Your waay to young to have the freedom of a 18 year old.And your mom is right,almost all 13 year old guys think about sex,sex,sex and he might pressure you into it and there will be nothing you can do when you lose your virginity to bring it back again.You might not be interested in having it now,but if he pressures you just a lil bit you will give in.
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i am 13 too and I totally know what you're feeling, and I know that it stinks. You need to tell you're mum exactly what you told me, and then see what she says, tell her that she is ruling youre whole life, tell her that she can't always watc over you, tell her that you need to grow up and make you're own descisions. And you also need to tell you're boyfriend this too. He won't be mad, and if he is, i he woth keeping. Good luck!
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