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Take it or Talk Back?
Ok so I'm usually a fairly polite kid to adults (exceopt my parents but w/e) Ne way, my b/f and I have been together for about a year but his mom hates me. She often says harsh things hidden under sweet comments and I know my b/f hears her but never stands up for me. I always want to rebel and say something back but I'm not sure. Is it better to take it and show her I'm a good person? Or talk back and show her I can defend myself? Please help.
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Want to answer more questions in the Miscellaneous category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Etiquette?
Talk back but don't stoop to her level.
Don't raise your voice at her because in the end, it'll bring her satisfaction to say you're rude and have no respect for your elders.
If anything, talk back in a sarcastic but nice way. Give her a sweet smile while you're answering back, it'll drive her crazy.
-- xxclusive
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i dont think you should necesarally (sorry i cant spell) like insult her back but you have every right to just say that wat she says is bothering you, but mabey say something to your boyfriend first, and then just tell the mom how you feel. good luck :D
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Um... Nice, polite person or not, you shouldn't take crap off of anyone.
The woman is cutting you down every chance she gets, and she will continue to do so if you don't put your foot down.
I mean, really. You say that she already doesn't like you, so I highly doubt you are going to change her opinion of you by taking it. So why take it?
If your boyfriend gets upset with you for standing up for yourself, remind him how wonderful of a job he is doing about it...
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Yes I would say you should talk back; not in a bad-tempered and glass-breaking way, but in a firm and reasonable way.
If she says something such as "I wouldn't mind if you stay for dinner but I've just cleaned the kitchen dear." Throw back a comment with sacarsm " It's alright, I'm heading home for dinner soon. No one beats my mum's cooking." Toss it back at her. Don't raise your voice. Don't be rude cos once you do any of this, she'll have an extra reason for going against you.
Meanwhile, talk to your bf bout this. Ask him to do something, I mean he's not helping the situation by not doing anything. Tell him to talk to your mum and ask why is she behaving that way, and see if there's any wrong tt you've made or watsoever.
So remain calm and cool. If you can, plan what to say before you meet her so that you are ready to take her on.
Somehow I feel that if you were to say things like " I really don't like the way you're talking to me" , it'd egg her on to be more sarcastic towards you. I maybe wrong, but that's wat I feel might be the case.
If she really goes over the edge, then it's time to say things like "I really don't like the way you're talking..etc.."
But whatever the situation is, always tell yourself to remain calm. Don't get fired up.
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when she says something rude you should me muture about it but also stand up for yourself, hadel it like an adult mabie say something like "ouch" to show you dont like it.
have a talk with her away from your boyfreind and say this in the niceest way possible
"i really dont like it when you say tose rude things to me, and i want you to know that you may hate me but im trying to be nice, im trying to get to know you, im trying to like you, but your not coopaperating, i just want you to handel this a little more mature, if you dont like me then fine, but saying those things isnt going to help the situaltion. i really like your son and he likes me, and that not going to change so if i were i would suck up the fact that were together and at least try to be a little nicer. ive takeing in your comments for too long and its bothering me, just tell me why dont you like me? what did i ever do to you?"
after the conovostation even if shes really mad let her cool off and when you leave to go home give her a hug and say c-ya to show that you really care and that your not the wicked wich.
or mabie for now just keep takeing them in, pretend you didnt notice what she said to show that it doesnt bother you, she might stop, but if she deosnt i suggest you talk.
--ashley
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You should definately take it and be the better person. It would be best to show her how much more mature you are than she is.
The only time I feel it would be appropriate to stand up for yourself is if she bad talks your friends or your family. In that case, it would be polite to say something like, "I beg your pardon, but I don't appreciate the things you say about the people I love. You have your opinion, but you don't need to say things like that. Especially when I can hear you."
If the things she says about you really start to bother you, I don't see anything wrong with calmly talking to her about it and discussing why she has such a big problem with you. Your boyfriend should be included in the discussion as well.
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Take it and be the bigger person.
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don't say anything..b/c maybe you bf loves his mom and if you say anything that'll ruin the realtionship...plus you already no she hates you....do you want her to hate you more??...maybe...she'll come to her senses and soon relize your not a bad gf....or you can just talk to your bf about it...
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