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mom problems and im deppressed gothic and confused
Just 13/f my mom and I used to get along really well but now not at all. Im gothic its what I like and I talk about making out and stuff like that around my friends but not at home im totally different I sit in my room waiting till school the next day or an excuse to leave and sneak to go with my friends places. I love my friends with my life. But my mom hates my friends and me. Everything about them and me. Im gothic and my friends are gothic. But their all I got I love them with my life. And my mom hates everything I wear and how I act and who and what I like. But she has no idea what im going threw. I cry my eyes out without my friends they are the only people in my life that understand me. Around my friends im myself without them im very depressed and very very mad. I cant tell my mom anything she tells everyone everything! So I give up on telling her. I tell only my gothic friends anything and everything. But my main best friend is a guy which I can never ever see as friends. Because my mom found out we both love eachother. Hes the kind of ?preppy?depressed? dork but I love him. Im either with him or my other bffs. Hes the first person to fix my life evey morning. I hate my life when im home in the morning but I love it at school. No mom! But if my mom knew my life shed be so sorry if she had this life but shed kill me if she found out. Im the kind of freaky girl whos never had a boyfriends but a lot of guys love me I turn them down I break to many hearts and im just waiting for my bff to be my bf hes the one I love and he loves me we even talked about what would happen if we would happen to date but both of us said what would happen to our friendship. Hes depressed but wont show it to anyone but me and one other person and my bffs. And everyone is dying so im used to death is that normal? So many people that loved me have been getting killed dieing or suicide. So I cant cry at all I just cant I try. That’s another reason why I have no one else they die. Im gothic I get yelled at and have to change it every time I listen to music I like or dress how I like. Even for any black. im going to explode and I get violent. im so messed up confused and depressed. Every time she says all that’s wrong with my friends I get extremely mad and yell. She hates them but their all I got. And my best friend that’s a guy I cant see either because she found out we liked each other. Our moms are even very close friends. But we convinced our parents we didn’t like each other anymore (but we do) were just hoping about getting in a relationship once this all levels out. But pretty much if you didn’t no it you’d think we were dating. We hug we laugh we kissed we are the closest ever. We have never been sexual together were not even dating and I don’t think I will till im like 15. but we sure talk perverted. But all I want is for my mom to leave me alone about everything. I cannot get a therapist. But what should I do to change her thoughts about my friends, clothes, personality, guys, grades, jewelry, music I can even go on and on about what all she hates about me. also my life is explained by the band Evanescence listen to It youll under stand my life.
A I wana change my mom hating everything about me.
B whats so bad about being gothic we have our own ways of fun and people hate us because when we go gothic but we go gothic because people hate us so leave us alone.
C is it bad not being able to be myself without my friends.
D im depressed at home then at school it all changes. How do I change that.
E is it bad that we wait for eachother and I turn down other guys.
F I hate his mom so does he also. How do I help his life.
G whats wrong I cant cry. To many people die so im used to death?
H how do I get her to like my friends.
I how do I make it so I can see my bff again (the guy)
J is it bad for us to be to … lovey together
K is it bad to think and act perverted I do now my friends are
~please help me~
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I understand where you're coming from basically because I've been there & done that. I went through a goth phase and I had family members asking me when I was gonna be "normal" again. Normal to my family is ghetto or preppy. Which I'm neither of. I just basically wear what I want. When I was in that phase, I hated everyone, and much of my depression comes from those times, but I deal.
I would see a counselor so you guys can discuss things on how to solve your problems & try to be happy again. You need anti-depressants & some anger control medicines.
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Hey, it sounds like you're going through the same thing as another girl I gave advice to on this site a couple of days ago. Please have a look at my answer to her, I think it will really apply to your situation as well.
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