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family and marriage
ok me and my boyfriend are getting married when were 19 but were doing it secretly so my parents don't know. Is this a bad thing to do even if my parents do not accept him. I knooow you might say im too youn but weve been dateing for over 2 years and it's the only way i can be happy because at home with my parents im miserable but when im with him im happy i feel no weight on my shoulders. We've only been on 5 dates sice we have been going out and i only see him at school and thats it. myparents keep me isolated from him. Someone please help i don't know what to do. I love him and want to marry him but then again i feel like imm back stabbing my parents.
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Marriage is one of the most important aspects of your life, and you should share it with your family. Keeping it a secret will only put a strain on your relatonship with your boyfriend, your parents, and the one between your boyfriend and your parents.
Plus, when you're 19, you have so much more life to live. I know you love him and that you want to move out of your parents' house, but you can love him without marriage and you can move out without marriage.
Why do your parents seem to dislike him? I know that one of the biggest mistakes a boyfriend can make is not trying to communicate with their girlfriends' (it can go either way, though) parents. Are you sure that he makes an effort to talk to them? If he doesn't, your parents may not like him because they don't know enough about him.
Talk to your parents. Lack of communication could be the problem here. Let them know that you really care about this guy, and ask them why they don't like him. Tell them that you love them, and that you want them to accept your boyfriend. Also, tell them that it would mean a lot to you if they could get along, since you care about your boyfriend and your parents so much.
Be calm, mature, and polite. Don't throw accusations at them; That'll only make them tune you out and less likely to take you seriously.
I hope I helped, and if you have any more questions, feel free to leave one in my inbox!
-Manders
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Well to be honest you may be a little young. But you also have to do what makes you happy. Sometimes people find love at a really young age. Other people find happiness at an older age. You shouldn't feel like your back stabbing your parents, but you should also if you're adult enough to get married you should be adult enough to tell them. You are of age, and whether they like the idea or not. It's ya'lls decision to do what is best for the both of you, whether it be getting married or waiting and just taking a step back and realizing am I gonna make a mistake or should I just wait and see what happens. Good Luck in making your choice whether you get married or not.
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This may not be what you want to hear, but yes, not letting your parents know about this is not the right thing to do. I think you know this already, since you have enough doubts about it to ask. Your parents love you, and are only trying to protect you. I don't know your story, and why they haven't been allowing you to see him. But they are your parents and deserve to know what you're doing with your life. I know how you feel when you're around your boyfriend, but you should realize that you've only been on five dates with him. Maybe now you feel so wonderful, but later on down the line, responsibility is going to rear its head. Marriage isn't only about love. I have a feeling you're only doing this since your parents are prohibiting you from seeing your boyfriend. If they weren't, would you still consider marrying him right now, at the age of 19? You're still young. I urge you to reconsider, and to think about what all this could mean to you later on down the line, when you're looking back.
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Is there a reason why your parents don't like him? There has to be some type of reason. They can't just not like him for nothing.
Anyways, I think it's a bad idea to get married at that age, AND to keep it from your parents. Your parents are a big part of your life [whether the impact they give is negative or positive], and they deserve to know most things about your life, or what's going on it. You're entitled to privacy, but don't you think your parents would be pretty damn pissed if you got married & they found out the hard way? Mine would. It's best you just tell them & get it over with.
Even if they highly dislike your boyfriend, they want you happy. Believe it or not. And you are backstabbing your parents. It might seem like the right thing to not tell them, but they're always gonna find out no matter what, and it'll just make things worse between you.
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