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How do I convince my dad?
I posted a question about sex and being molested on friday. Many people who gave me advice told me that I should see some kind of psychologist or therapist.
Last year, my parents split and my school councelor suggested a therapist for me to go to.
I went to this lady and she only saw me once, we set up a meeting for another date, and I left. I came back the next week and she wasn't in her office, she wouldn't answer her phone, and I never got any kind of call back from her so I just quit going.
Now the problem is that not only do I not have a school councelor but now my dad is not willing to pay for a therapist and he thinks I don't need any help.
How do I convince my dad to take me to another one?
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To convince your Dad that you need to see a counsellor you will need to tell him the truth. Explain how hard it is for you to move forward in your life whilst trying to deal with being molested. A school counsellor is usually there for problems concerning everyday life in and out of school ie bullying, and not for your kind of situation. You need to see someone who deals more with being molested. A rape counsellor will have more experience - ask your doctor if he can refer you or ring up a helpline. If your Dad still does not think you need a therapist could your Mum help you out if you are still in contact? On behalf of counsellors I can only say that we are not all flaky or sicker than our clients. I wish you all the very best.
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I'm assuming from this that he doesn't know you were molested yet. In that case you need to tell him the truth and who did it to you. This person needs to be caught as you can bet any other girl he's around is in danger.
Tell your father you really need help to get through this ordeal and move forward in your life as it's continuing to disturb you. I'll tell you something about therapists--avoid them. What you need is a psychiatrist to talk with about this. He/she can put you on medication for your anxiety or depression associated with this.
I've seen a lot of therapists and haven't met a single one that wasn't a flake or sicker than their actual patient. They can do nothing for you at all in my opinion other than waste your money can make you talk around in circles every time.
The therapist you saw is obviously not a good one and something funny is going on with their practise. Do not waste your money finding another one. Tell your father the truth and get a child/teen psychiatrist referal from your family doctor.
There is no shame in seeing a psychiatrist but a lot of suffering and shame for not seeing one and needlessly hurting. No doctor can cure or erase what happened over night either but they can give you tools and medications to help you cope a lot better than you can now.
Let your secret out as holding it in is doing nothing for you. If your father knows the real reasons you need professional help you can bet he will bend backward to make sure you get it.
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Tell him how it's effecting you. If he loves you, he'll get you help.
Drop a guilt bomb on him. That usually works for me.
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