|
overprotective parents
do you think it's reasonable for a seventeen-year-old girl to be forbidden to get rides from her friends? i mean, my mom and dad don't let me drive around with my friends. it's not like they're fucking drug dealers or anything, they just don't like it. i try to be empathetic and see things from their point of view, but i don't. i don't argue with them unless i really disagree, and i just don't think it's fair. please tell me if i'm being totally uncooperative in feeling this way. and what can i do to get them to ease up a little? i hate not being able to go anywhere unless they pick me up and drop me off.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
well i think its reasonable, but i dont think its right. if your parents get to know one of your friends that drives, maybe theyll ease up and let you drive with them? at 17, do you have your licence yet? you could probably get a car for relatively cheap, would your parents keep you from driving yourself?
]
Your parents love you and seem pretty overprotective. They simply don't want anything to happen to you. Point out to them that if they didn't want to risk something happening to you, there is no point in you even leaving the house. Ask your parents to think about when they were teenagers. Remind them that you are resonsible. Get a cell phone, if you don't have one, so your parents could call and check on you. Your parents need to see that you are growing up. You are missing out on all the good things a 17-year-old girl should be experiencing. If my advice doesn't work, go to family counseling so an unbiased third party can help you reach a negotiation.
]
I actually have a friend your age & is only allowed to get rides from her parents as well, so don't feel like you're alone out there. Your parents are just concerned & would feel responsible if anything were to happen to you. You should be thankful your parents care about you & are looking out for your safety. You can try making an agreement that you won't ride in a car with more than one other teen (since there's not that much of a distraction for the driver). I know it may be tough & maybe, at times, embarassing or a hassle. But once you're 18, I'm sure you'll have more freedom.
]
Hmm...
I might understand why your parents feel the way they do...
First of all... Accidents are frequent among teen drivers. Not just among the teens that drive intoxicated, or drive like they think they are in the movie, "The Fast and Furious." But also among the relatively safe teen drivers. What it boils down to is a lack of driving experience.
For example... When I was a teenager I was very cautious when I was in my car. I didn't talk on my cellphone, I didn't speed, and I rarely carried passengers because I was afraid that they might distract me. Did I ever get into a car accident? Yep. While pulling out of the parking lot of a grocery store near my house, a truck barrelled down a right turn only lane and ripped the headlights and hood off of my car. I saw the truck coming. But because of my lack of experience, all I could do was watch in horror as the truck came speeding towards me. Luckily, no one was hurt. But if I had pulled out another three feet he would have smashed into my driver's side door. I could have been hurt very badly, I might have even died.
So... I don't think that you're parents are afraid that your friends are drug dealers, or suspect that they drive while intoxicated. They probably fear for your safety just because your friends are young and lack experience. They just want to protect you. I think that's fairly reasonable.
And I would like to say that while I understand how your parents feel, I understand how you feel as well. You are reaching an age where you consider yourself independent. You want to be able to go where you want when you want, and you get frustrated when your parents limit your freedom. Perfectly understandable.
And I commend your maturity. You're all ready trying to understand how they feel, and doing your best to avoid any unnecessary arguements.
My advice... Just try to understand. You're their daughter, they love you and they want to protect you from harm. You might feel frustrated and sheltered now... But soon enough you'll be an adult and able to go wherever you want to go whenever you want, with whomever you want. Try to be patient.
It might help to talk to your parents. Talk to them in a calm, rational manner. Trust me, they'll be impressed by your maturity. Explain to them that you understand how they feel, but that you would like them to trust you a little more. See if the three of you can reach a compromise. You and your parents may or may not reach a compromise that allows you more freedom. Either way, stay cool. If nothing else, your parents will walk away feeling that you are mature and sensible, and respecting you and trusting you more.
-------------------------------------------------
In response to your feedback... I think your idea about letting your parents meet your friends and talk to them is fabulous. Best of luck. ;)
]
Your parents are probably really concerned about your safety. Teens now a days are irresponsible when it comes to driving . Have you heard about kids drinking and driving that is probably one of the reasons why they are strict and concerned about you.
]
what are they going to do when your 18?..
not let you be an adult?.. but anyways, i understand. can you drive?.. if so, then just say your going to a friends house(if you have your own car) and leave from there with that friend.. lying is bad, but hey, if you wanna hang out with your friends, then you have to do something...
how about bringing up the 18 year old thing.
tell them you want more freedom.
hope i helped..
]
More Questions: |