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Heres the deal
I have this friend who did almost everythin with a guy she even made out with another guy wen she was dating some guy and well im kinda with someone and she keeps tellin him tht she did all these things with a guy and wud tel only him not anyone else she even wanted him comin to her house a few times im worried she mite want something from him like being more then jus friends but i feel i mite be blaming her for somethin tht isnt there..i duno wat to think..thx
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
If your best friend if always trying t oget with your BF then tell her is bothers you when they spend alone time together. If shes a good friend shell understand that your not cool with it and back off. You also have to trust that your BF wont do anything with her either.
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i was friends with a girl who hung out with a lot of guys, and complained about other girl's attitude towards her. later on i discovered that she cheated with a guy who had a G-friend, also cheated with a guy while she had a B-friend, she casually sleeps around, and is extremely competitive to steal men's attention away from other girls, including her own best friends... i've seen her go so far as to flirt with a nerdy guy just because he was hanging around and interested in one of her friends, its like she can't bare the thought that her girl-friends are getting attention from guys that aren't into her.
and then she wonders why she is all the time fighting with her best friends.
i think that this is what is going on with you and your friend. i think that a girl who gets attention from a few men love that kind of attention that they get. and they start to see every man in that light, someone that they can possibly flirt with; someone they can makeout with. and not an actual human being.
it is very possible that your friend can't understand that your boyfriend is a human being, and should be treated with respect; and that he is not just "a guy" who'll give her the attention that she wants from him i.e. flirting, makingout, etc.
i'm sure that if your friend had any feelings for the friendship that she has with you then she wouldn't try to undermine the relationship that you have with your boyfriend.
she is not being a good friend to you right now, and i think that you have a duty to your relationship with your boyfriend to spend less time with her... stop hanging out with her, try spending more time with your boyfriend. if she calls you on your sudden absence in friendship just confide in her that you are sorry, but you are spending a lot more time doing things with YOUR boyfriend, and stress that in the conversation. use "my boyfriend" a lot, but not in a childish (myyyyy BOYFRIEND) otherwise she will know that you feel threatened by her.
just be cool, calm, and mature about it.
if your boyfriend still wants to do things with her or starts to wonder why you aren't doing as much with her as you were in the past, then simply tell him that you just want to take some more time to develop your relationship with him right now, and that your friend has other things to do right now... but don't tell him the truth, otherwise he might think you are overacting, and see you as being childish... also, he might tell your friend.
good luck!
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"thx she also started spreadin rumors bout me to other friends lies like i told her things i never did n also makin my rep bad..how can i make this stop?? help lol "
I don't think that she is a friend of yours at all what-so-ever, and the sooner that you drop her the better you and your relationship with your boyfriend will be.
since she seems like a vicious person who would spread more rumors about you, and possibly even make it her life's ambition to wreak havoc on your life and your love life if you cross her. I think the less offensive way to get her out of your life is the best option.
stop hanging around her, if she starts walking your way at lunch, etc. just get up and leave, smile at her, and stop and chat for a brief few seconds and tell her some made up story like.. "sorry, I can't stay, but my parents are riding my butt about my grades and i need to go study." etc. or if you HAVE to sit through lunch with her, make sure that you are not alone, in other words that you have other friends around. and just sit quietly... maybe you can join in with light conversations. don't offer up any information about your life, or the life of your boyfriend to her or the rest of your friends.
if you are quiet more than usual, and they start to ask you about why you are being so quiet just say something like, "teacher so and so, is being a jerk and i'm just bummed about it thats all."
the point of all this is to try and distance yourself away from her to the point that she no longer assumes that you will be reliable "friend" that she can do things with (talk on the phone, gossip with, shop with, steal a boyfriend away from, etc.) and when she no longer relies on you to be her "friend" or as i like to call it her crutch. then you can quietly and gracefully bow out, and start to live your life backstabbing "friend" free.
this method may take some time, but all things worth having usually do, and the peace of mind that a "friend" is no longer in your life to spread rumors, and possibly steal your boyfriend away is worth it.
either way the last thing that you want to do is let this 'blow over' even if she did die down with her flirty ways to your boyfriend and her rumor starting of you, that doesn't mean that she will stay that way forever. it will only be a matter of time before she starts up again on you.
and the other option is to tell her how you feel, and possibly have this thing increase into a vicious fight between the two of you, and no offense but you seem like a nice girl who will fight fair, but she seems even more likely to be a the type that wouldn't fight fair, and therefore i don't think you stand a chance of winning.
so, good luck, and i hope i helped.
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