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important mistake!
so i am going to sound rediculous, and this may be long, i appologize. but i am in a strong need of advice and this is the only place i can turn to without a biased opinion now.
i went out with this guy zach. he was really sweet but kind of immature. but i really liked being with him b/c he understood me like no other person ever has, he was a good boyfriend. well his immaturity got to me and i broke up with him, but we both thought it was only temporary, i know this.
we never stopped being best friends though, the day after we broke up it still didnt feel wierd. its a little bit mroe distant but that was my choice after this happened...
2 weeks later we were talking bout getting back together and we were flirty and he told me how much he loved me. well i have history with this girl in my school, we were friends and we got in a fight b/c she didnt get invited to my party [yea immature little fight that teenage girls get into, i know i was wrong but we all grow up] and instead of just being catty like any other teenage girl she went to the shcool and told them my dad beats me, i had bruises form volleyball but no my family is fine i never told her this she was just trying to cause drama. me and my sister almost got taken out of our house by social services, she thought this was funny. well her name is kelly.
and at this party zach was all over kelly they were cuddling in the bed, fell asleep together, and flirting alllllll night and every1 there [even he admits] that they were acting like boyfriend and girlfriend. this really hurt my feelings b/c it wasnt just any girl, which i would have been upset but not say anything, but he knows what she did to me and he was the one i was crying in the arms of when social services told me and my sister we were going to be taken into foster homes [they didnt b/c lack of evidence, me and my siste rof course denied everything]
it felt liek he betrayed me... i tried to mention it but all he said was "im not replacing you with kelly" and i told him it was about alot mroe than that, he will just make me feel like im being over jealous.
today he asked me out again, he did that with kelly last sunday. i told him im gonna have to think bout it, that hurt me but we are great together. he gets me more than anybody and i love hanging out with him but the kelly thing will always bother me =/
ONE MORE ISSUE, i dnt have alot of time... there is this guy Matt that is the sweetest guy ever. he likes me soo much and i liekd being with him, he makes me feel really good. he's friends with my friends and really the perfect personality but im not sure he knows me at all... he likes me but i feel liek if i let out my crazy side or my temper gets the ebst fo me he will not expect it and think of me differantly
so the questiosn to answer :: should i dump zach? or go for matt?
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Zach might have been trying to get you jealous. But just incase he wasn't ask him whatever is on your mind and he'll make sure he gives you and eplanation but no one can tell you who to go for. And Matt you said he was the sweetest guy ever and you liked being with him. You should talk to him and get to know him he might be your right guy. I hope everything goes well for you!
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Well since you mentioned this other guy. I think you're learning towards him.
Zach wouldn't have done anything with that girl. Especially when he knew what happened between you two. He wouldn't have gotten close to her like that.
It seems like he wanted you to get jealous. Because if you saw him with another girl... you'll supposedly want him more. I think that could have been a plan. But I don't think anyone should tell you who to go for.
And this Matt guy..? I guess you could go for him and get to know each other a lot better. People will always think of others differently when their emotions let loose. But it won't be drastic to I like you to i hate you/You're weird
unless you do something drastic/wrong. Like your temper, if you punch someone. Maybe that's a bit too far.
You could give Zach another chance. But he seems like more of a best friend. He would have put your feelings in consideration instead of getting close to another girl.
You could go for Matt. He seems to make you happy.
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simply, i think you should dump zach. he was doing it to get at you wether he says so of not. kelly is obviously a bitch and he stepped over the line by going for her. i suggest you give it a try with matt. who knows, he might like your quirky side :) one way to find out!
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Before advising you on your boyfriend, I have this to say about Kelly: what she did was positively vicious. Not only was it a grotesque lie, but every time someone files a false report like that, it puts children who really ARE in abusive situations at risk. I hope you've told the entire story to your parents so that they may choose to deal with the situation. If I were advising them, I'd tell them to seriously consider pressing charges against Kelly for slander.
That having been said, Zach displayed total disregard for your feelings by even acting friendly toward her, let alone flirting and cuddling with her. He knows what she put you through and apparently doesn't care that much. Jealousy doesn't need to enter into it - if he respected you, he would give her the cold shoulder. Heck, even if he didn't know you, he should still know that someone who would be so dishonest isn't good to get involved with.
Furthermore, it occurs to me that Kelly did this on purpose, just to upset you even further. Zach should have realized this and not allowed himself to be used. The fact that he went along with it does not speak well of his character or his intelligence. You might mention that to him when you tell him what to go do with himself.
Because that's what I think you need to do: dump him immediately and make it clear that there is no apology he can make to win you back. As you say, if she had been just some girl, it might be forgivable, but for him to do this with someone who caused you so much pain with her lies... that's just plain wrong.
As for Matt, give it a chance. Maybe he doesn't know you so well, but that's part of what dating someone is about. And if you give him fair warning about your temper and your wild streak, he won't have anything to complain about.
But put Zach and Kelly firmly behind you. Don't sink to their level by using Matt to make Zach jealous (that's totally unfair to Matt in any event), and don't try to retaliate further - just cut them both out of your life as much as you can and be done with it. Kelly is a vindictive bitch and Zach is a thoughtless tool, and you're better off without either of them.
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it sounds like your friend Zach is torn between two. he doesnt know whos more important. you saw how they act. you obviously care about zach more than matt, matt sounds less like a player though. so it depends on your type of guy.
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