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i just cant get over it...why??


Question Posted Monday February 5 2007, 11:27 pm

about a week ago my ex of two 1/2 years told me that he couldnt be friends with me anymore bc his current gf was getting jealous.
i dont blame her..he was telling me he still loved me and wanted so badly to be together in the future. as my profile says..i am in a serious realtionship but am still in love with the one i view as my soul mate..well..thats him..
tonight he texted me and now we are talking on aim about it. he is currently apologizing for falling in love with her and ceasing our friendship bc of it...well i went to his myspace and read her comment to him and i just busted out crying and havent stopped...she was saying she loved him sooo much and she'd do anything for him and hes her world..it was soooo hard for me to sit there and read that knowing our past together and knowing he still feels the same way about me that i do him.
im not quite sure what i can do to get over him...its been 6 months since we broke up and we havent really talked at all besides a few brief convos about getting back together..ive tired not talking to him but it just hurts worse..does anyone have any suggestions as to how i can stop loving him???


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twistedsister17 answered Tuesday February 6 2007, 12:08 pm:
This is normal for anyone. You've been in a long, serious relationship. It may of even been your first REALLY serious relationship. Of course, these are always the hardest to get over.

I know it's hard, but you should try to talk to him less. The more you talk to him, the more he is going to tell you that he loves you and blah blah blah, and the more you are going to miss him. If he's not breaking up with his current girlfriend, then why bother with him anymore? When you talk to him and spill your emotions to him, you're only giving him the satisfaction of knowing that you're falling apart without him. DON'T let yourself get like that.

You have alot more in your life than him. So instead of focusing on him, get involved in hobbies. What do you like to do? Spend more time doing it. Some great hobbies to take up are: cooking, dancing, writing, acting, singing, drawing, sports, instruments, etc. Or just focus more on your schoolwork. Another good thing that you should do is keep a journal. Write about how you feel about the whole situation in your journal. It will help to relieve stress and take some weight off your shoulders. You can even write songs and poems about him or how you feel. It will help you channel your inner thoughts onto paper, and it will relieve stress.

Another great thing- get your anger and hurt out of your system. You can do this buy playing vigorous sports, self defense/martail arts, kickboxing, dancing, running/jogging, riding a bike, or just plain working out. Any physical exercise you do is helping you to channel your anger into the activity, so that all your negative feelings are out of you. Exercising also releases certain chemicals in your body which make you feel happy. Plus, you're staying healthy,so its all good!

Remember to take a minute to breathe once in a while. Watch a movie, (Lifetime Movies are my absolute FAVORITE to watch when I feel upset.) have a snack, (like chocolate, which will also make you feel happy.) and relax. Don't wait on your ex boyfriend. The relationship is going nowhere. Get out there and take back your life! Hang out with friends, family, or meet some new people! Find a better guy, I know you can do it! :]

P.S. This is kind of random, but usually after a breakup, I make up a fake boyfriend (usually on myspace) to make my ex jealous. Not the best idea, but then again, when he starts saying how much he "wants you back." you can say, "NOPE too late, sucker!" Lol. :)

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luvbug555 answered Tuesday February 6 2007, 3:08 am:
when you get that feeling, that you miss him, concentrate on a friend, a school assignment, a movie, anything to distract yourself. i think its one of the most horiable feelings in the world, to like someone and not be able to be with them. but this guy does not sound right. iif he is talking to you about how he loves you while hes dating another girl, what is he gonna tell other girls when hes dating you? you need to forget about him. maybe get a picture of an Abercombie (sp) model and keep it next to your bed. imagine this is your boyfriend. give him a name, a personality, and when you miss the other boy, just think of all the bad things about him. about how he would probably hurt you when you start going out. if your mad at him, you wont love him anymore. Anger conquers everything, even love! good luck!
xo

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Annerszz_101 answered Monday February 5 2007, 11:50 pm:
Wow, I`m really sorry, It's hard to get over someone for that long. My suggestion is to try and do more activities such as joining a group or going to a youth group or engaging in sports to get your mind off of him. Try hanging out with friends and I`m sure they can help you forget about him. You could also try keeping an online blog or a journal/diary so you can get your feelings down so you will feel better. Try meeting new guys and hopefully you`ll find someone worth your time.

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