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Boyfriends and friends shyness
So, I don't have a boyfriend, to be honest not any guy friends. I only talk to guys if they break the ice but still then it is only the necessary answer or statement that will get me out of talking because I know if I go on then I will make myself look stupid infront of him (and a lot of times I'm like that with girls too).
Once you get to know me I'm outgoing meaning my friends tell me I'm funny. I can keep a conversation going with a friend but never with anyone other than that. I feel like an outcast because I'm so shy. I don't know how I have friends because I don't talk to anyone very often. Well I can but it's REALLY HARD!
I want to know how to be outgoing to get guy friends and boyfriends but I'm so shy it gets in the way. My resolution was to be more outgoing (it isn't working). I don't know what to say to people so telling me to just talk to them and see what happens WILL NOT WORK!
THANKS SO MUCH>>>>>more answers the better!
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Just like eye color, being shy is something you are born with. You've got to face it, and start off small, but just work your way up. It can't happen in one day. It CAN happen eventually though. Start talking to a few more people each week.
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Hey! You sound exactly like me! I have the exact same problem. EXACTLY. So I'm going to be hypocritical but I'm going to try it too okay? Well have to tell you a quick story first, when I started high school this year and I signed up for musical theatre. I LOVE musical theatre, but I got there and didn't know anyone. So I was sooo uncomfortable. And everyone was like you'll make friends, but I was too scared if I acted weird or outgoing, everyone would think I was weird and it was at school so I was thinking, oh god I'm going to have to know these people for like at last the next three years if I make a fool out of myself and they see they'll tell someone, or they just wont want to be my friend, so I didn' make any friends, and I' going back next year with out any friends, so I decided I either have to take a new approach or have to find some other people to come with me.
Kay. So you called this boyfriends, friends and shyness eh? Well assuming you are like me, you want a boyfriend someday right? Probably sooner than later if possible. Well I think you just have to wait it out. It sucks but you don't need a boyfriend and most of the time they just get in the way lol. I don' have one either, but like I said I'm just like you when guys talk to me I'm like... uh oh. So I think that you figure out how to conquer your shyness and then get a boyfriend. And if anyone ever tells you that it' weird that you'e fourteen and you don' have a boyfriend yet, tell them I'm fifteen and I don't have one either! (That's actually happened to me and I wanted to punch the girl who said it to me. She was like I'e had boyfriends since I was in the fourth grade and I was like, great who cares?)
Second paragraph, again, I swear you'e describing me. As if we are like totally identical eh?
Okay, now before we get over our shyness, you need to know something, (I just learned about it yesterday!!) There are personality types that define who is shy. But shyness and the personality type do not HAVE to go hand in hand though usually they do. So There are two different variations of this personality type, extroverts, and introverts. Extroverts have lots of people in their life, but few good relationships, and introverts have few people in their life and almost all of those are very good relationships. So what you have to understand is that these aren't really things that you can change. You sort of have to make the one you are work for you. So you are an introvert (most likely) so what you have to do, is try and get more people to be your best friends. Now to solve paragraph three. You made a resolution to be more outgoing, so what we have to do, is go to a class with people we don't know. People who don't go to our school, and we probably wont see ever. Then we have to force ourselves to make friends. It will teach us the skills to make friends and teach us that making a fool of ourselves isn't the worst thing in the world. Then we need to take what we learned and apply it to our school friends. We need to try and take initiative and be the first to talk to guys. Guys can be clueless, so we need to take the first step. Go up to one in science and ask them a question. As you do it, think: "I'm pretty, I'm smart, why wouldn't he want to be my friend" and give him a ravishing smile of yours and he'll remember it. Show off your humorous side and show everyone that you can be outgoing and have fun.
Shyness is something that is hard to get over, and we both will have to work on it, but if you want to get a resolution solved it takes work right? Well lets both try it out, and let me know how you're doing later this year kay? Hope I helped a bit (and didn't sound to hypocritical) good luck, and remember you don't need a boyfriend to be awesome! And your friends don't make you the person you are, you do! Love ya,
Angie91
(if you want to let me know how you're doing or just want to compare lives LOL, I'd love it, princess_in_pink723@hotmail.com)
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I am the exact same way. With my friends, i can be stupid and whatever, but if i'm around strangers I can't talk very much. Don't worry about getting a boyfriend. I'm 15, and haven't even had a kiss, let alone a boyfriend. Whenever you find "that guy", you will know. And I bet when you do, you will be able to talk, despite your shyness.
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