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jealous
16-f. my boyfriend and i have been together for about 5 months [we go to diff. schools, just incase that helps]. and im TERRIBLY jealous and i hate it. pretty much all of his friends are girls but hes not a player or the type that flirts around, hes only had 3 girlfriends before me [likewise with me], so im only jealous because i freak out that hes going to like some other girl and leave me, but hes never given me a reason to be jealous. he reassures me all the time that he loves me more than anything and would never leave me and wants to be with me forever, and sometimes i can snap myself out of feelin jealous and feel better, but other times it just drives me insane and makes me feel sick to my stomach i worry so much. what can i do to stop feeling like this? ive already talked to him about it and again he keeps reassuring me that he couldnt love anyone else as much as me, and dont say just realize that hes with ME and not them and be greatful, because i know and i respect that but i still feel jealous. even if he just adds a girl to his top 8 or has a random text messsage from one of his friends. ahh!
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ok...well...all i'm going to say is this...you need to stop being so insecure,or your going to lose him...i'm not saying this to be mean...but he might get tired of it...and he might leave you...and i don't think you want that to happen...good luck...
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i feel exactly the same towards my boyfriend of a year and a half. he goes to a different school. the way i feel is that im a girl and i know how girls can be when they want a guy bad enough and it scares me that he might get dragged in with the wrong "crazy" girl. but you have a right to be jealous its natural but if theres no reason, like theres never been any suspiscion then just think. he is my boyfriend and hes with me and he has been for 5 months .. hes mine! lol hope i helped
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i have the same problem. i was told by one of my friends "dont worry...youre just acting as you should do...like a GIRLFRIEND!!"
i worry all the time he'll go off with someone else...our guys sound similar, (as in theyre not players, theyre nice and reassures me the whole time). the only way i can control my jealously is by him reassuring me...which sounds awful, but i too, get freaked out when i find texts, or myspace messages etc.
it really bugs me about his ex though, they get on, and only even talk on msn...and i dont know why im paranoid theyll get back together. they only went out for 5 mobths, and ive been with my boyfriend since last year in september. its actually almost impossible that they will ever get back together...but yet i stupidly worry.
you have to weigh up the differences...e.g she hurt him, he hates her, you ll never do that...he loves you. if you get me.
the only reason we worry is because we love our boyfriends, and you always worry and care for those you love. its a natural instinct.
the girls he is friends with ...you shouldnt worry about as long as they only touch him appropriately then its fine. if they touch him inapropriately, then THATS the time whrn you have to have words with either them, or your boyfriend.
he sounds like a typical nice boy, who was brought up properly and taught not to treat a girl disrespectfully, just from his description.
i also know the main reason why i worry, which may apply to you too. my first boyfriend treated me really badly, and cheated on me. it only lasted 3 months, but they were the longest, worst months of my life. this, i think emotionally sacarred me, and im convinced that all my future boyfriends will do as he did to me.
the only way you can over comethis is to believe what your boyfriend tell you, and if he says i love you, you have to believe him. he may get offended if you reject his emotions. (i know mine does, and this happens as paranoia gets in the way)
dont get yourelf worked up over nothing. i do that too much, and you feel like shit for the rest of the day. if youre ever upset, tell him, as if he loves you, he should be willing to discuss any problems you have :)
ive learnt not to cry or worry about something until its actually happened (though i still do it :S)...it depends how bad the situation is really.
im sure things are great for you two though :)
good luck, chin up
im here if you need me
i hope i somehow helped you :)
dia (alex)
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Relax, sweetie. He has given you no reason to think this way, this means it is your problem and not his. However, if you continue to seek reassurance from him, he will eventually tire of your lack of trust in him and move on to somebody who trusts him more.
There is an old saying that what we fear the most, we create for ourselves. If he actually DID cheat on you, he wouldn't be much of a boyfriend, would he? It is not the 'other girl's' fault a boy cheats, it is the boy's choice.
You either have to learn to trust him, or face the possibility that he will not put up with being put on the defensive all the time. Trust is a personal choice. You must choose to trust him and choose to believe him and believe IN him to do the right thing. When you start to think bad things about the other girls, just remind yourself that he hasn't chosen them as his girlfriend, he chose you. You need to reassure yourself that he is worthy of your trust.
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