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around my time.
im 17 and i have a job but i work maybe 3 days a week. My dad never works around my schedule. he always plans Activities on the days that i work. And he does it purposely. Like the whole family will go bowling, out to eat, to an amusement park or the movies. And of course i have to work. And when i get upset or pissed about them doing things without me i get yelled at about it.
its drving me nuts. Im still part of this freakn family. What do i do?
thanks
- We can do these things everyday of the freakn week but its always the days i have to work. I have explained and begged and said please plan things when i dont have to work, but they dont.
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Maybe it would help if you didn't yell and just talked about it. Yelling probably only makes the problem worse. Hope I help;)
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I think it's great that at 17 you still want to do family things. Your Dad should appreciate that. In addition, it's great that you are working..I am giving you a pat on the back:-) It would be nice if your Dad would be more understanding. When my oldest was 17, he never wanted to go anywhere with us as a family. He always had some excuse, and would have rather been with his friends. That's pretty normal, chosing friends over family. I am guessing your Dad doesn't realize that he should be honored that you want to spend time together. You are growing up and will move on with your own life someday soon. Your Dad will probably regret that he didn't make an effort to make arrangements to include you in the family outings. Perhaps you could point that out to him.
In addition I am wondering what would happen if you would plan some family activities on your days off? Tell your Dad that since he overlooks your schedule, you just wanted to be sure you were included. Make him feel really important..tell him that you miss him! Guys (even if they are our Dads) like to feel important you know. Best of luck :-)
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Ok first off could it possibly be a question of money? With you not there it is cheaper so thats just something to think on.
Secondly, you need to have a calm discussion, not one when you are upset, with your mom not your dad if possible. Explain that you are hurt by this and that while you understand that you won't be able to always be a part of all activities you would like to be a part of some. By going to your mom you are hopefully showing her a mature young women and she can talk to your dad for you.
Lastly, is it possible that your dad doesn't want you to work? What he is doing sounds alot like he is being passive aggresive and purposely planning stuff you want to do but that conflicts with your work schedule which in the long run would make you want to quit your job.
Without knowing you or your family this is the best guess that I can give you. Hope it helps.
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