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Flaky husband
My husband and I have been married for almost two years. We married after finding out I was pregnant with my son. I've followed him to his home town, far away from what I know. I've had a hard time relating to his family. He promised me stability, (a house, a good job for him, an opportunity to go to school) We've been here 6 months living off unemployment. He finally got a job, but wants to quit. We just moved out of my in-laws place and into an apartment. (more bills)
He is even considering the Army national guard. We were active Army before, (where we met)I spent my whole pregnancy alone, cause he was deployed. I don't want to go through it again. I can't divorce him, nowhere to go. I am afraid of what a divorce will do to my son. Any advice? Experienced advice appreciated
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well, actually, i have gone through the whole parent in the service thing and my mom married my dad because she was pregnate and they are no longer together... we now live with my aunt and uncle and are just great.... we have a roof over our heads and food to eat... we get to go out with friends and everything that a normal kid/teenager should do... my mom and dad gave up custody to my aunt and uncle and we have lived here for 10 years... plus all the time we lived here with our parents and my aunt and uncle (that was before they decided to divorce). My mom got remarried and i like my step dad to an extent... i cant really completely except him because my mom promised me she would NEVER remarry and she did... my dad turned to drugs and went to jail for about 7 or 8 years of my life. and he just got out... but hes doing much better now and wants to be a part of my life now... and if you ask me from seeing my parents yelling and stuff, the divorce was for the best and we are so much better off now than we were when we were when they were married.... they both have there lives on track and are able to pay bills and they help with the things that we need and everything. but thats about the best i can give at this point... i hope i helped at least a little bit...[[good luck on whatever you decide]]
Destiny
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First, you need to talk to him and explain that his marriage to you is a commitment and at this point in time, with a young son, it should be his priority. Unless he has a real reason for wanting to quit the job, he needs to stay with it.
If he's unresponsive or simply doesn't care, you should definitely consider divorce, even if it means having to stay with your family. I would not stay with your husband for your son's sake- my mom did the same thing and it just made things harder. When your son is older he'll have more feelings about it- at this age it's not going to make a big difference. Divorce is much more traumatic for teenagers and older children.
If a church or somewhere nearby offers free or cheap family counseling, or you can find a way to afford it, it would be a big help. If not...sometimes just the threat of divorce can make a husband improve his behavior. He might not even have realized how you're feeling.
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well dont you have framily that will take you in cause hes not going anywhere with you so kick him to to the curb you need soeone that will fill your needs anyone else is not good enofe you need to find a daddy that will be there for you and chur son
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divorce isnt the answer to everything, but you cant talk to your husband and explain to him that chnages have to be made then that might be the only answer for the sake of your happiness. he has to understand that he can not just be getting jobs and quitting them, he has a family and bills to pay. he has respocibilties and if he doesnt want to own up to them you will find someone who can or learn to do it on your own. yes, divorces can be hard on children... but your son is still young. do you really want him to spend his years going through what you are because once he gets older he will realize how things really are, and sons hgave a tendency to lean towards their mothers, so if your not happy chances are he wont be happy either. but dont just jump into a divorce. really sit down and talk to him and tell him what you want and give him a chance to make the changes. good luck.
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