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Brother & Best Friend
My best friend (who is 15) is dating my younger brother (who is also 15). Sometimes I feel left out because I'm 18... But I just found out that my brother had sex with her. I really don't know what to say. We are a Christian family. I should tell my parents, probably. I just don't know what to do. What if my best friend gets mad at me?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
You can't do very much in this situation that will have a good practical effect, unfortunately. You can let them know that you think their new relationship a bad idea; they probably won't care, but go ahead and say it anyway. Make sure they understand that you have no intention of running interference for them, that you won't help them cover anything up or keep secrets, and that you won't lie for them. Tell them that if your parents ask you directly whether they are having sex, you will say, "I believe they are." (Unless you've actually caught them in the act, that's all it is - a belief.)
As to whether you go out of your way to tell your parents, that depends on circumstances. Was this a one-time event, or is it an ongoing thing? If it happened just once, then whatever damage from it is done and telling your parents won't help anything. If I were you, I would make it clear to them that what's past is past, but if their behavior continues you will feel compelled to act in what you feel to be their best interests, and tell your parents about it. Remind them that no method of birth control is foolproof, and that their actions do NOT affect them alone; they may end up affecting an innocent child.
You may lose your friend over this, unfortunately. If it's any consolation, it won't be your fault, but hers for failing to act responsibly (having sex when one is not prepared to deal with possible consequences - for example, a baby - is irresponsible behavior).
Once they reach the age of 18, however, they are then adults and what they do together is no longer anyone else's concern.
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Why would you tell your parents? You should counsel them on birth control options and let them know that you don't think it's a good idea to keep up the activity but that's as far as you have any right to go.
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well i dont think u should tell your parents but i think you should try to persuade your brother to tell your parents , and you should also try to talk ablout it with your friend and also tell her that your some times feel left out and try and work it out between you all. good luck !
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try talking about this situation with your best friend first. let your best friend know that you're concerned with the situation and discuss what you all should do. when you bring up the subject, she might not know how you found out and if you've already told other people. reassure her that you haven't and that she's the first you're sharing the knowledge of what happened. figure out what the best thing to do is and try to work it out. it might be hard to bring up the topic with her, but try to find the right time and everything will follow along. hope everything works out for the best for all of you! (:
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