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confused friendship
I have been friends with this guy since i was 12 im now 17 in the past year n a half we became really close to the point where he will stay at my house and stuff... he went to college but every weekend he would come home and stay here... I used to like him and i told him and he told me that he didn't wanna ruin the friendship and that he didn't feel the same way... One day we were layin in my bed watchin tv and we started messin around and ended up havin sex. It only happen the one time but now he like comes over more and we are always together and everyone thinks we are a couple but were not. All my close friends tells me that he likes me he just won't admit it and i don't kno what to do or think Help
sorry its soo long
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You really need to sit down with this guy and talk about all of this. You say that you have spoken with your friends about this and you have their opinion but what about his?
I know that there has been some feeling so far that he might have used you. I'm not going to deny that as a possibility but it isn't the only possibility. It might be that he likes you too but can't admit it.
However, he shouldn't be having sex with you if he can't tell you how he feels and you shouldn't be having sex with him as long as you don't know where you both stand.
Next time you see him, try and talk to him about this. Tell him that you really like him but you don't know how he feels and you need to know. I would recommend staying away from any phrases that might suggest you can have sex again if he says he likes you, just to be on the safe side. However, do tell him that you have liked him for a long time and you have a right to know how he feels about you. Wait and see what he says to this and then you will have to work out what to do. If he says he doesn't really feel anything beyond friendship for you or if he says he doesn't know how he feels, do NOT have sex with him again, at the very least until he is sure he has feelings for you.
The fact is that although most men don't see it that way, sex is actually quite emotional for most women and if you get into a sexual relationship with him when his heart isn't in it, you will come out feeling the fool and your poor heart will badly broken. So make sure you know how he feels first and then take it from there.
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Well, obviously he used you. I'm not sure if you realize that or not but he did. He won't admit he likes you, yet he had sex with you? That's sad. He is very immature and I wouldn't continue to do physical things with him. If you're friends, that's fine. If you're a couple, that's fine. BUT the line needs to be drawn and you both need to be open and honest about your feelings.
Most of all you need to stop having sex because you can't raise a kid together if he won't even admit he likes you.. and kids come from sex..
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he likes you.
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i think you should ask him how he feels towards you so you can know for sure.Ask him and if he says NO, then stop having sex with him cuz hes obviously taking advantage of the fact that you used to like him so,he thinks that if he has sex with you,you wont say no.if it turns out he dont like you dont have sex with him and tell him that you are only freinds.
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Well, while it does sound like y'all have a consisten frienship, I think there might be a possibility that the guy may be taking advantage of just how much you are willing and care. I know in the past you have let him know how you feel and his response probably made you feel slightly rejected, but I think the best thing for you to do would be to try talking to him again. Express to him how you feel for him. Don't go over the top though and scare him. Just get your point across. Tell him you enjoy spending time with him, but this "couplely-action" is giving you mixed signals and not really fair to you. Especially since sex is involved, you are probably even more attached to him. Make sure that he is not taking advantage of the fact that you'll have sex with him. You need to ask him straight up what he wants out of this. I know it may be tough, but if doesn't want a REAL, official relationship with you, I would start to distance yourself from him. I don't mean y'all can't be friends or hang out, but don't do things couples would. It would be okay if it's what you both wanted, but I can tell you want more. And although you probably like that attention from him and the security of "having a guy" you need to clear this up before you get hurt. Good luck. :)
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