|
Confusion about co-worker
Okay I will try and keep this as short as I can, but there's a lot to tell. First of I am a 25/F and I have this ongoing issue with a guy at work. I am older than him and a bit higher than him on the heirarchy of positions but not technically his boss. Anyhow there has been some flirting back and forth, so I think anyway, we are both very discreet so it's really hard to figure out what the true intentions are. He is so confusing, I have never had this problem figuring out a guy's motives. Maybe I should just list of the things he has done and said I think that would be easier. Besides finding him staring at me and the long gazes between us, he has found ways of touching me, from the shoulder, forearm to the small of my back. He has ran his hand through my hair more than once and his sideways hugs have turned into full frontals and really tight bear hugs. If I have a new bracelet on he holds my hand with both of his and inspects it for what seems like forever. He has held my hand randomly at numerous times. He will walk by and say my name and then some comment about how I am his favorite or his best friend there or more recently that I was sexy. He also every once and awhile makes sexual jokes that come off as invitations, and my replies have started to be something like don't tempt me. However for all these signals he is sending he can act very aloof and somewhat ignore me. He drives me crazy but we are friends and I don't want to screw anything up or lose us our jobs. I also found out that he's seeing this girl that he's apparently all about but he keeps it very secret and when people say anything about him having a girlfriend he replies that he doesn't have one and that he's a pimp. So that makes me think he is a player and I shouldn't waste my time. But when he's not in front of other people and just with me he relaxes and seems totally different. Also if he's all about this girl then why does he mess with me? Does he really like me or am I just something to play with while he is at work? I don't see him act like he does with me with anyone else so I just don't know what to think. I really like him but I feel like maybe I shouldn't and I am just setting myself up to be hurt. I hope I made some sense here and any help would be appreciated.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Work/School Relationships?
Dear,Confused It sounds like your guy is Obsessed as far as what you've told me it seems as if he's using to play around with..i think if he's going out with a girl or even talks about her that you should stop the flirting..even if it costs you your friendship you need to let it go if it's bothering you as for your job you should get fellow employes to keep in eye on him too. Your friend Violet
]
First of all is there a rule at your company about dating co-workers? If there is then walk away now its not worth losing your job.
Secondly it sounds like he is flirting but if he acts differently infront of others then that is one of 2 things either a. he's just playing you or b. if there is a rule at work then he is playing it safe.
From personal experience it is never good to date someone you work with, yes for some people it has worked out but for the majority it doesn't and then you are stuck seeing this guy every day it can be really uncomfortable.
In the long run I think that if he truly does like you then he will make the first move by asking to see you outside of work. Just be careful.
Hope this helps.
]
Well its really complicated so Im not sure what to tell you. Based on what you said hes definitely flirting with you and it sounds like he likes you. And if you like him then maybe you should tell him and try to start something. If he doesnt have a girlfriend already youll be able to tell... cant tell you how but its this sense all females have =]
Some guys say hes a PIMP as a joke. Like oo I hook up with girls at bars cause Im single so im a PIMP. does that make sense?
I dont think youll lose your job, cause you said you guys were really discreet, which should help you.
I know that me and my guy friends flirt and they say stuff like that to me all the time, but kiddingly. But then again, we`re teenagers, and your adults. It sounds like he likes you, but I would talk to him about it first. Like next time he makes a sex joke go with it. Drag it on to make it sound like your interested and see what his reaction is. Just remember that in a work setting, and a friendship deal, it can get ruined when its over.
Im sorry I was all over the place, hope I helped.
]
More Questions: |