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Which boy??
So I like this guy in my last class but he has a girlfriend. But he hits on me all the time. Today his hands were never in appropiate places (i was willing so it wasnt like he was being a dick) But he still has a girlfriend. PROBLEM. I also like my ex-boyfriend.. i hit on him a lot but not so much with him hitting on me. I think if i tried i could get this guy back, he was really great. But I dont know what to do. One has a gf the other i've already dated!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I would advise very strongly against going after this guy who has a girlfriend. Other than the fact he is already taken, he clearly has no respect for this girlfriend and there's no reason to think he would show you any more respect if you were to take her place. If he was to dump her for you, you would hardly be very popular and that's not the sort of reputation you want.
As for your ex, this situation is entirely up to you. There's nothing wrong with getting back with an ex as such....but if you broke up with him, you might want to think about why you dumped him in the first place. Did he cheat on you? Was he not there for you? If he behaved badly, you can't expect he will behave any better this time. If you think he might be able to get his act together then by all means give it another go but be prepared for the fact that he may just let you down again.
You might be better off forgetting both of these guys and finding someone new. Someone who respects women and doesn't hit on other girls when he has a girlfriend. Someone who you haven't already dated and someone who truly deserves you.
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alright i had this problem once! forget the old bf theres a good rule of thumb for these things and its that if it hasnt worked before and he wont hit back on you then its pretty easy to tell that it wont work agian. so this new guy about him. you should tell him that you dont want to be the girl that helps him cheat on his girl and that you like him and that if he wants to break up with his gf thats fine but otherwise you dont want to do anything that could hurt the girl not because you like her since you are trying to steal her boyfriend, but as a girl theres this sort of code and your not going to help a guy cheat since every girl knows how much that hurts. but i wouldnt if i was you consider dating him cuz see if he does this to her and cheats on his gf then wouldnt he cheat on you also? once a cheater always a cheater. so before you have that talk with him consider that. if you want to IM me and talk my aim sn is oxmisslizxo and we can chat about it.
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Let me address the two issues seperately. Let's take the first guy who hits on you who also has a girlfriend. Put yourself in his girlfriend's shoes. A guy who is dating you but hits on other girls. At any moment he could dump you and date someone else, or worse yet, will date other girls behind your back. Is this someone you want to date? If this is okay with you, and you trust him and are up to the challenge, then he would be a good choice. If you wouldn't trust him, would feel disrespected by someone who hits on other girls while he is dating you, etc., then he may not be the right choice for you.
Ok, let's move onto the other guy, the ex. Isn't there a reason you guys broke up in the first place? Who did the dumping? If he did the dumping, and then he is not responding to you when you hit on him, then you need to take a hint and leave him alone. A man does not respect women who are desperate. If you did the dumping, and then have changed your mind are hitting on him, he may not repond because he is resentful. Nobody likes someone who keeps changing their minds. If this is the case then he may be resentful or may not respect you. This is not good either. If it was a mutual decision and you both were in agreement that the relationship should end, and you guys left on good terms, then this would be your best bet. Be careful of falling into the on again off again relationship though.
All in all, neither may be good choices for you, but at the core, you really are the one with the most information about your situation, and the best one to decide. Any advice you are given is based on the limited information you are willing to share. Good luck, and feel free to share with me the outcome. I'd love to hear how things turn out. -Thanh
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