Okay, I have a boyfriend and I love him more then anything. Only theres this little problem. I haven't gotten over my ex boyfriend. Me and him have been goin on and off for the past year or 2. He's moving at the end of the year and he now has a new girlfriend. He told me that once he could drive he would come back for me. (We're both 13) Only he told me that a few months ago before we went out again. I sort of flirt with him alot and don't realize it. My question is, am I cheating on my current boyfriend in anyway by flirting with my ex? He doesn't flirt back or anything because im pretty sure he doesnt like me like that anymore. I dont want to cheat on my boyfriend, and if I did i didnt mean to. Please help
I'll rate high im desparate for help =[
girlygirl answered Tuesday April 4 2006, 3:42 pm: If you are saying or doing anything that you would not do in front of your current bf, then you are cheating. Cheating doesn't always mean the physical aspect, but the spiritual one.... See, your current bf trusts you and you are not being true to him or the relationship. [ girlygirl's advice column | Ask girlygirl A Question ]
tipsy_gypsy answered Tuesday April 4 2006, 3:09 pm: You're not cheating on your boyfriend... but you're walking on the line. The question is, if your flirting with him were to make him want you back, would you go further with him? It's one thing to flirt with people for self-esteem, and flirt with them knowing it's just harmless flirting, that nothing will come from it, nor would you want anything more... but it's another to flirt with someone you want, while you're in a relationship.
You're only thirteen. You'll go through several more boyfriends during highschool, and you'll think you love them all. It's teenaged drama, it happens to everyone. If you're 'in love' with your current boyfriend, then you should be over your ex-boyfriend. If you still have feelings for your ex-boyfriend, and you 'cant get over him', then why are you with your current boyfriend? Isn't that unfair to your current boyfriend?
You need to give up the ideals and fantasies of your ex-boyfriend, and focus solely on your current boyfriend, if you really do love him. That's not to say you can't still be friends with your ex-boyfriend... but only that. Nothing more... not even flirting. Turn the tables around for a minute. If your current boyfriend couldn't get over their ex-girlfriend, and flirted with her, how would that make you feel?
I hope everything works out. I know teenaged draman and angst is difficult... but like I said, everyone goes through it.
badmammajamma answered Tuesday April 4 2006, 2:51 pm: Cheating? No, everybody needs to flirt to keep their self-esteem up. It would understandably concern your boyfriend though, that you're flirting with someone who you might actually become involved with. It's not wrong yet, but it is not the right track. [ badmammajamma's advice column | Ask badmammajamma A Question ]
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