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friends
I'm 14 and I feel really bad because I don't have any friends. Girls just seem to not really give a damn about me. I'm so lonely and depressed right now. I haven't had any friends since I was in the 5th grade. I haven't had a person my age at my house for a long time. I don't know why, either. I try to make friends. I rarely badmouth people and I try to be friendly and pleasant to talk to. Why doesn't anyone like me?! I've tried everything; nothing seems to work. Pleaaaase don't say "join a club and meet people who share your interests blah blah blah" because I've tried that millions of times, and I try to be friendly, but nobody really seems to want to talk to me.
I've also tried asking people I know over to hang out. They almost always say they're busy, or if they're not, they either spend the whole time checking their watch, or we have a great day and the person acts like nothing happened the next day.
I feel awful. Can anyone help me?
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Friendless,
Maybe you are too desperate. Have you heard the phrase "Love comes when you arent looking"? Well, its the same with friends. Just lean back and have fun. Maybe when you are in school or at a function of some sort, just be yourself. Lets say you want to befriend the person sitting next to you in class. Just say something that you two have in common. Like the book you guys are reading. Say "omg I looove this book." or "this book really sux." But, dont come off as negative. You know, just bring up some stuff to talk about, then poof. You have a friend. I dont know about "poof". It might take awhile to be "Buddies" with someone. Anywayz,,, hope this helped.
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I spent a lot of Middle school like this because I was too shy and didn't know what to say to people, I was just really quiet. As I got older I met different people, and eventually I just found ones that I liked. Don't blame yourself, you just havn't met the right people yet.
I was gonna say clubs, sorry. You say you've tried it a million times before. You should keep going, so you form relationships with the people in those groups.
You could try inviting some people from that group out, like to see a film in town, or to go hang out in the park and get drunk. You could also throw a party. Don't worry if you don't think loads of people will turn up, you can start with small gatherings, just chilling out and watching a film or something.
Don't act too desperate to make friends, even if you are. Act cool. This means not appearing to be bothered whether they like you or not, or if they care about what you say. You'll look desperate if you're always looking at them when you say something, like you need to nkow their opinion, or if they approve of what you just did.
Maybe you seem bland to other people? Establish an identity! Decide what it is that makes you you. Wear clothes that you like, not what's in fashion. Don't worry if people think you're weird, because weird is interesting, and people will be interested in you.
Also: never say no to any opportunity. If someone says, do you wanna come out with us this evening, DO NOT SAY NO. Say sure, why not, I got nothing planned. This includes school activities and trips and even stuff you're not sure about. TBH you will need the experience.
Sorry if you think this is rubbish or condescending advice but its what I would have told me if I could send a letter back a few years!
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i was gonna say try just being friendly, and smile alot cus people like people that are happy and confident and have a good attitude. but you say you try being friendly and obviously it isnt working. really the only thing i know of is to make new friends ..try hanging out with the guys for a while ..im not really too sure of anything else...good luck hun
♥ evy
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