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what do you do when you fall in love with your best friend (of the opposite sex of course) and they dont know and you dont want to ruin the friendship? im a girl by the way.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Take it from someone that knows. Ignore it for a while but if the feelings keep on getting stronger then act on it by telling someone. not nessicerly them. maybe a counslor or a really well trusted friend. [♥]Lej
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Well...
If you really think that a relationship with your best friend will mess up your obviously good friendship... then maybe you should wait a while before talking to him about it.
My boyfriend [of 9 1/2 months] was my best friend before we started going out. I realize, of course, that sometimes it doesn't work out the way we want it to... but obviously you get along well with him. He's your best friend!
Ask him... if he likes someone. If he says "No..." or says Yes, but won't tell you who, then... there's a possibility that he's afraid to say something.
I loved my boyfriend before [WAY before] he even knew I liked him. And though you might be skeptical, I know what love is. And I loved him. I loved him enough to sacrifice my own feelings and put his first.... but that's another story for another time.
If you're afraid that it'll mess up your friendship; then wait. See if your attraction lasts for a set amount of time [two months.. six months.. whatever seems right for you].
You could tell him that you're attracted to him, but don't want to pursue a relationship outside of friendship because you don't want to lose his friendship.
You could... ask him out and hope for the best. This, of course, is not what I would do. Some guys don't like girls who make that much of a first move... some do... but doing something like that gives you a great chance of being hurt, rejected, and losing your best friend.
My suggestions...
- Think. Hard. A lot. Think about what you feel for him, and if you're ready to pursue a relationship, and if you could see yourself with him five years from now.
- Wait. At least a little while.
- Observe. Watch him carefully, notice his faults and strong points. Write these down, and think about them.
- Question. Ask who he likes... if he likes anyone... what he thinks about you... what he likes about you [as a friend]... what he thinks his strongest charactaristic is, and what he thinks his weakest charactaristic is.
And if you're sure you want this, then tell him that you like him as more than a friend, then go from there.
-FunnyCide
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If you really think a relationship could mess up your friendship, I would think hard about it before making a move. I would take things very slow and just see how it goes. You could start by giving the friend a hint and trying to find out if they're interested as well. Perhaps something in a joking manner like "We spend so much time together people are going to think we're dating." and see how it goes. If the friend is interested, he'll probably pick up on it. If he's not, you've found out without having to spill your emotions. Good luck whatever you decide.
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