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confused
Well ive had a b/f for 11 months now and i do love him or else i wouldnt be so confused....Theres no spark anymore because hes so up my butt lol...He doesnt leave his dark room to hang out with anyone else because he said he might miss my call and he hates everyone because he said he doesnt need friend he only needs me and im only 17 so i dont want a relationship like that. and there is this guy and when ever he flirts with me or even talks to me i get excited.....and smile but i know if i break up with my boyfriend he'll fall hard and cry n stop going to school and do stupid things and i wouldnt be able to handle that! what should i do?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
If you really feel you want out of this relationship then you have a perfect right to do so- you are not obligated to stay with this guy and you are not responsible for what he does if you leave him. If you want to make it work you have to talk to him gently but firmly about giving you some space and generally getting a life outside of you. You may be the best girlfriend in the world but you are not his mother and every guy needs friends.
Your crush on this other guy seems to basically represent the freedom and fun you're not getting from your boyfriend so you need to decide whether you want to try to get those things from your bf or if it's time to move on to someone else who can give them to you.
good luck
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Hey its your life, why should you be unhappy just to please that nerd? Go with the man thats makes you tingle inside! Trust me, you will be 10 times happier! Your ex needs to learn to move on or he won't survive in the real world, he will jsut be stuck in the dark room. ok so thats my advice! good luck
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Space is needed in most relationships. You need to find a way to evict him from your butt. Everyone needs to have friends. Even if they are just a close few.
You can't and shouldn't be this guys entire life. What he does in reaction to you is up to him. Those are his actions and whatever he chooses to do he needs to own.
If you are unhappy then you should leave. Don't stay because you are afraid of what he will do. Staying only makes it worse and he is more likely to try to keep you by guilt.
I know there are medications to take that will eject things from your bum, but I believe they are ment for tape worm, not clingy, dependent boyfriends.
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I think what you should do in this situation is talk to your current boyfriend about it. Tell him everything. Let him know that you're not ready to be that serious yet and you're worried about him. Tell him that you're finding yourself interested in other guys. Tell him the spark is gone because you want a fun relationship instead of a serious one at this point in your life. Tell him what's bothering you about him. Let him know that he could lose you if he doesn't give you what you need. This could either a) tear the relationship apart, b) change absolutely nothing, or c) actually make it better! If nothing changes, with a sufficient amount of time for him to get over being upset, calm down, and try to change, then it would be best to break up with him. Break ups happen and he'll be able to handle it. Don't put yourself through lots of pain just to keep him from feeling any...that's just not fair! Talking about it first though is the nice thing to do. He deserves a chance especially if you've been with him for almost a year. I hope that everything turns out the way you want it to because, remember, your happiness comes first. He can take care of his own. Good luck!
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Wow so if you would break up with him..You feel like it would be your fault if he did all those stupid things..
You could get excited about this other guy because he isn`t up your butt..Its something that happens uncalled for.. Its not an everyday situation..Maybe thats what you need with your current boyfriend..Talk to your boyfriend tell him how you feel about this..I wouldn`t bring up this other guy cuz it def. sounds like you want to make things work with your boyfriend your with now.. Tell him to go out and do things and that he does need friends.. Tell him to not make you his only thing in life cuz thats not a garantee..*He might think you don`t think you`ll be with him forver or not want to last a long time*but mention thats not it..Tell him your only 17 and your not thinkin about things like he is.. Hope i helped.. ♥Dez
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That sounds familiar.
I was with someone for almost two years, and then I went to college. I started meeting new people, and the connection I felt like I had with him faded fast. He, too, said things like he doesn't need friends and he just needed me. At the time I was 17, too, and I did NOT feel comfortable having someone cling to me and depend on me.
In the end, I broke it off. I'm with someone else now and I beleive breaking it off with the other guy may have been the smartest thing I ever did.
What was hard was realizing that I wanted to break it off, mostly because I knew what he would be like without me.
Your guy sounds exactly like that guy I was with. Where breakups are concerned, you've got to be a little selfish. What would be best for YOU? If staying with this guy is going to kill you, then don't do it. Definitely don't stay in the relationship for his sake. If you stay, stay because YOU want to.
From what you said, though, it doesn't sound much like you want to. You don't sound like you're ready to be tied to anyone.
If you break up with your boyfriend, it may hurt everyone for awhile, but eventually he will get over it, and eventually you will come to terms with what you did.
If you don't, you may be miserable, especially if this guy who gets you excited and makes you smile decides he doesn't want to wait for you and you lose your chance with him. Your boyfriend may be happy, but in the end, if you think about it, if he figures out that you're not happy, he won't be happy either.
The choice is yours, but in your shoes I think I would try to talk it out first - explain to him that if he doesn't start trying harder to spend time with you, and if he doesn't work at the relationship, he's going to lose you. If he's not aware there's a problem, he can't fix it. Give him a chance to fix it, and if it doesn't work, then you can give up on him.
Unless, of course, the spark is already so far gone that you don't think he can revive it. That was the case with me. If that's how you feel, you may have to grit your teeth and tell him you want out.
While you may love him, you're not married to him. You can get out if you need to. Keep that in mind, and when making your decision, keep YOUR best interest in mind. Not his.
I hope this helps - good luck.
-Siren =)
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