I broke up with my boyfriend about 4 months ago. Since about the week of our break up, I've been hanging out with one of his best friends, and we've become extremely close. I'm beginning to fall for him, and likewise... but whenever this happens, I change my mind. I like the challenge, but once the other person starts to have feelings for me too, I'm bored and don't like them anymore. I really don't want to do that this time... because I really care about him.
I'm afraid to have a relationship, because I know that, being the way I am, I'm going to ruin it and lose an amazing friend.
Help?
hotrod answered Sunday January 8 2006, 11:08 pm: ya i know how you feel. i had this problem a long time ago. it sux. it was simply a phase for me. i hope itll pass for you. it sux. i know. i think what you should do is tell him that you care for him. but you dont want to make anything exclusive. because your afaid to hurt/be hurt. k taht way he has an idea of what i going on in your mind. hell respect that. if he doesnt, he isnt worth it. k sweetie. i hope i helped. xoxo hotrod [ hotrod's advice column | Ask hotrod A Question ]
Bella12 answered Sunday January 8 2006, 9:00 pm: You know what, the same thing used to happen to me. What you need to do is make sure that you are serious about this guy. Whenever i went out with a guy it didnt take too long and we'd be breaking up because i would loose interest. I think this happens cuz even tho you like this guy he may not be your type, and even if you dont know this it might be true. I think you should let him know that you cant rush into things and that you wanna be sure about things befor you take it any further. If he sticks around and you dont loose interest you will most likely be positive that you arent going to loose interest for no reason this time, if he doesnt stick around you know he was only up for a little fling thing and that saves you heart ache, but like i said dont do anything until you are completely sure, and dont shrug off any doubt you may have until u are completely positive about your feelings for each other and your relationship and i can almost guarentee that you will not just loose interest out of no where, and if you do i can almost guarentee it wont be untill a long while after you are dating and all the good times you guys will have will be worth it. [ Bella12's advice column | Ask Bella12 A Question ]
LadyGoodman answered Sunday January 8 2006, 6:48 pm: Why don't you explain this to the guy? It would help for him to know and maybe it would help him not throw himself at you and make you lose interest. Also, it would be best to drag out the time before you actually date him, so that when you go out with him, you will have stayed interested so long that you are practically sure that nothing will fade. [ LadyGoodman's advice column | Ask LadyGoodman A Question ]
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