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i lost him
Me and my bestfriend had a fight...I told him that I was talkin to someone that he doesnt like, im the kind of person that doesnt judge before actually getting to know a person, so he got really mad and told me never to talk to him again. I dont know what to do he wont answer me when I talk, and he ignores me. It's hard to just say "oh well i'll move on" because we shared so many things we even thought about going to prom together (im a girl) and now he doesnt even want to talk to me or anything. I dont know what to do I want him to be my friend again. I know he wont talk to me b/c he is doing it (not talkin to her) to someother girl who was talkin to his ex. He is the kind of person who holds grudges alot and cant forget things easy.
I just want him back :(.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Something very close and similar happened to two friends of mine. I don't recall exactly what it was about, but things got a little heated cause one was super-stressed out and lashed out (with words) at the other and so for quite a while they didn't talk to each other and it was hard to talk to talk to one about the other cause they each wanted to be friends, but couldn't connect. While they haven't been close as they once were, they are okay with each now.
The moral of the story? Just be patient. The stressed one, the gay guy, in my case also is the type to hold a grudge or two, but he came around eventually. If a friendship is worth it, you just have to have patience and caring. You can't force your friend to speak to you.
In the meantime, hang out with other friends. Of course it won't be the same, but there's no reason not to have a good time cause one person has issues and put you in the middle, even if they are your friend.
Have fun, enjoy life. He'll be around eventually.
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You are in a difficult position- naturally you don't want to lose your best friend, BUT at the same time it can't be denied that he's acting unreasonably. I'm sure it's already occured to you, but does he perhaps have stronger feelings for you than those of ordinary friendship? It could be that he just feels jealous of your talking to other people.
Having said that, the reason for his acting up is actually fairly irrelevent. More to the point is the fact that his strange attitude is judging you for being the wise, kind and sensible person that you clearly are from your question.
It's his problem, not yours!Knowledge of which is, of course, no help to you in dealing with the situation now that it's blown up.On the other hand, it should help you to know that you really shouldn't apologise to him, however tempting it might feel and however much you miss him and feel that apologising would bring him back. The best thing you can do is to tell him that while your love for him is unchanged, you will talk to who you want and make friends based on how you think people behave. In short, you're not controlled by him!
(I do suppose that if this person that he didn't like actually did something real to upset him, you could promise not to get close to them, but the principle still holds). Basically, try to make your friend feel as secure as possible, but not to the extent that his friendship will become a stifling burden, stopping you from behaving naturally. No friendship is worth that price.
The very best of luck and enjoy the prom, no matter who you take as your date! lucretia xx.
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He really is the kind to hold grudges, isn't he?
To be honest, I'd say that you might be well out of this one. No boyfriend has the right to dictate to whom his girlfriend talks and I really wonder what's going on that your boyfriend is so concerned with your talking to someone.
Yes, you've shared a lot together and it'll take time to get over it - no one likes getting over it. But, in time, you will and you'll be able to move on.
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that exat thing has happened to me yestorday, i lost my best friend over a stupid thing. :((
hope it gets better for both of us
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