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Love Gone Wrong
My husbands’ best friend, Bill, dated this girl for 4 months or so and then she started acting weird. My husband and Bill were also very good friends with Josh, the three of them were always going out together, etc. The three of them were each others best friends. Anyway, this girl, Ashlee, was pretty nice, but one day Josh came up to Bill and said that - Ashlee has been cheating on you with me. I love her and we have been together for a month now. After this there was a fight, and now no one is friends with Josh or Ashlee. Bill was very hurt, he couldn't believe that his best friend could have done something like this, couldn't believe he was stabbed in the back by two people he trusted. I don’t know what to do or say if I see those two, and I know I will see them no doubt. How should I act towards them, next time I see them? What could we talk about to keep the waters calm, or should we talk at all?
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I was dating another man when I met the man who is now my boyfriend (who was his best friend). No, there was no cheating involved because I broke things off with guy #1 before even even considering starting with guy #2. Obviously that is what should have happened in your friends' situation, along with Josh asking Bill if he minded. Since they handled it the way they did (i.e. wrong)they it puts friends like you in a uncomfortable position. I would avoid the couple for awhile while Bill gets himself together, and even then never invite all of them out in the same place. Of course if you don't want to be friends with them anymore, you certainly don't have to, but if you do make it clear to everyone that you refuse to take sides and refuse to gossip about the others.
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First you have to decide whether you are still willing to be Josh's friend. In saying this you may also have to realize that you may lose another friend in the process. People's egos have been hurt and this is a very tricky situation. Upon coming to this conclusion you will realize that all you can do is be a good friend. It is not your fault that these happened. You should not beat yourself about what happened. If the frienship is rock solid there may be a possibility of salvaging some part of it. At the very least people can be cordial to one another. In all honesty adults don't have to be friends with everybody. That train of thought goes out the window in kindergarten. It is not your job to make everybody friends either. It is just a fact of life.
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Well... are you mad at them??? They didn't necessarily do anything to you, so yea, at least be civil to them. You can ask them how they've been, talk about your life... and such... just don't mention Bill.. haha Good luck.
xoxo
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Try not to get personally involved, as hard as it is. By involving every single friend and their wives you are going to make what is a very messy situation absolutely disastrous.
Just be civil and attempt to speak as little as possible to them. No doubt they will try and convince you how happy they are together and how their love was worth the pain they caused. They are building teams and they want you on their side. But this whole thing isn't really any of your business so just walk away, and don't feel the need to relay every word spoken by them to Bill.
They way they have behaved tells you they aren’t people you really want to be friends with, so talk to them that way, calmly and casually, about the weather or local politics or something equally blah.
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