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Lost in Texas
I am 21, female, and in a committed relationship. I love my boyfriend... but everytime he tries to do something special it reminds me of my ex who was abusive in many ways. I keep on finding ways that he is like him. I don't want my fiancee to think I am crazy but I can't forget what I went through. What should I do if anything...??
Lost in Texas, Suz
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
It sounds like you have a little bit of post traumatic stress disorder. There is not really much you can do about it besides seeing a psychologist or psychiatrist. Explain what happened with your ex to your fiancee and tell him how you feel. If he really loves you, he will help you through it and make you feel a lot better about it.
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I would talk to your current boyfriend about it. See what he has to say on the matter. Then, I'd try to focus on all the things about him that are different from that of your ex. If you focus on all the good, hopefully you will eventually forget about the bad.
Good Luck =]
-Laura. (16-f)
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Dear Lost in Texas. Before I start, I went through something similar, only I was on the end of it. No matter what nice thing I did, I always reminded her of an abusive ex. I wasn't her ex, nor did I look a thing like him. He did nice things for her too but he'd beat on her. Guys love doing nice things for the woman they love. At least here in Texas, you should know, you are from here too. Guys that do nice things and are abusive usually have some other motive to be nice, like a con-artist would. If that's your current boy friend, drop him.
You must realize that this guy is different. Your ex had good qualities and that's what attracted you to him. His bad just out weighed the good. Open up to him, tell him how your ex seemed nice but he was abusive. I am sure he'll understand. He'll probably even say, "Well I am nothing like that..." Matter of fact I'll bet you five dollars he will. Honestly, I think you owe it to yourself and this guy to speak up about your past.
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