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what to do?
Im a female and 15. Well theres a guy ive liked for a few years that i went out with before. We're really good friends and i know hes someone who i can count on. Well i kind of fooled around with him before but it didnt really change anything, still good friends, and not going out. Well my friends think im going to have sex with him and i kno that he wants to.. He told his best friend whos also my friend before he wouldnt go do anything with someone he didnt care about or have feelings for. i dont know if i should avoid doing that though or not. And rght now im not a virgin anyway so i dont see it as a big deal but ive only been with one guy. I really want to be with him and everything and he's told people he likes me but he doesnt want to be in a relationship rght now but im hoping i can change his mind. I dont know what i could do to get him to want to be with me again... But i would do anything. Please help with tips or advice Thanks
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
If he doesn't want to be in a relationship right now respect his feelings.Everyone is in such a rush! Your sex life shoud be none of your friends or his friends business. So don't be rushed into anything on their account.
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well if he wants to have sex then talk about it with him. tell him that you want to be in a relationship before you have sex with somebody. if he cant deal with that then thats his problem. and dont let him fool you... he might ask you out just to have sex with you so wait a while if you do go out with him. good luck!
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Hello,
I am concerned about your thinking and want to respond. YOu said you can count on him. That is important. Sometimes that is more important than a sex partner. They usually go away after they get what they want. If you have sex with him, knowing that he does not want to be involved right now...you will loose a friend and someone that you could count on. If you want to feel lonely, go ahead. Because that is all you will get out of it. A few minutes of companioinship and being with some one who seems to want you for the moment, then months of loneliness. It is better to be alone by choice YOURS, then alone because you were used and dumped. Don't give anyone the opportunity to use you. You can remain in control. When that boy or man comes along who wants you for YOU, you will know. he will not be in a hurry to use you, only anxious to please you. You say you are 15 and no longer a virgin, you have had one lover, Please stop now. In the future you will meet a man who wants to be your ONLY lover and you will want to be his ONLY lover. Like or not, he is going to ask you how many lovers you have had in your life. Of course you don't have to answer, but wouldn't it be nice to be able to say, just two honey, you and a fling I had when I was younger. END OF STORY. Sorry, I know that my advice is old fashioned, but women have not found a way yet to have casual sex and not be profoundly affected by it when the guy doesn't call.........
Michele
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I sense a disturbance in the Force. Methinks you sound desperate. Don't be. If he really wants you, make he work for it. While I admit I'm no saint, every girl that I've always wanted to be with me after I've sex'd them were the ones that made me work for it. Seriously, if the boy wants you bad and isn't just in it for the bed squeakin' he's gotta put out 110% effort. Anything less means he doesn't care as much as an easier girl. You're not easy are you?
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I firmly believe that you should not have sex with someone you don't care about, or who doesn't care about you. There are a lot of consequences that can result from casual sex. Think about what life would be like if he got you pregnant at 15. It would change your life, not to mention any STDs that could get around. Be with someone who's willing to take precautions or take the consequences along with you.
I know sex can be fun, and I know it's a way of being close to someone. But it is not a way to make someone want to go out with you if they don't want to anyway. They'll take the free sex and move on and you'll end up feeling used.
Sex is a big deal. I'm not going to say you're too young to do it. I just hope you can use good judgement in who you sleep with. It's a lot more fulfilling when it's with someone you really care for.
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You have to make a choice at this point, do you want to keep him as a friend or go further with the relationship, but once you cross the line and get romantic the friendship will never be the same, so make sure you are ready to give up a friend if it doesn't work out. Maybe that is what he is thinking too that is why he is pulling away.
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