|
Note or something like that.
I'm writing my boyfriend of 7 months a note, I really want it to have an impact on him. He's amazing and honest and wonderful and I don't know what I'd be without him, and I've expressed that alot through the letter. Last week, I screwed up majorly and that's why i'm writing this note to him.
-- Last week I went snowboarding and I met this guy, before an hour had passed he had asked me to make out with him, since I have a loving and caring boyfriend I didn't make out with him because it's wrong, right? Like always, NO never works on a guy, so naturally he kept on harassing me. Insted of making out, we agreed on hugging. I told my boyfriend this, and to some people this might seem "over protective" or "obsessed", but he got really upset with me.
Everything is wrong now, so I told him I didn't hug him, i just dont' want to lose him. I know i should have confessed and stayed that way, but you've got to see it from my point of veiw. What I'm trying to say is, is there anything more to put in the letter to make an impact on him... I also need to have advice on what to say to my boyfriend about the other guy.
Please help, I'm desparate.
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Did you tell your boy friend about the fact that this boy wanted to make out? If not you maybe should. Tell him that this boy was sort of harassing you. And besides I think it was also peer pressure what this boy was doing tell your boy friend that tis hug was to make this boy leave you alone before hee pressured you into doing something "worse" I hope it works out.
Karazi Kenzee
]
Just don't say anything about the other guy.Don't keep him thinking about it.
Do write the letter. I'm better at expressing thoughts in writing than talking. I write my hubby almost every night and leave him email!So go for it.
Just one more time tell him nothing happened and you want to drop it about that other guy. Next time just leave and don't talk to a guy like that.unless your avaiable.
]
I know that what I am about to say is going to sound harsh, and I am sorry. I know that I am not really answering your question. Again, I am sorry. But I would like to point something out...
You did nothing wrong. I REPEAT, you did NOTHING wrong. You told the other boy no, and did not allow yourself to be a victim of pressure. So you hugged another boy. Big deal.
Please understand that I am not accusing your boyfriend of being a bad person. I'm not accusing him of being a bad boyfriend either. He's jealous, and that's natural. But relationships aren't built on love alone. Relationships are built on trust. If he can't overcome his own insecurities and learn to trust you, this is only going to be the first of many problems.
Yes, I agree, you should tell him how much you love him and reassure him. But I also think that you need to stand up for yourself. You need to point out that you didn't do anything wrong, and he doesn't need to be jealous, he needs to trust you. I'm not suggesting that you be mean to him, all of these things can be said in a caring and gentle way. But this is something that he needs to get over right now.
He needs to get over it right now because there are other boys in the world. You are going to have friends, and just friends, that are boys. Is he going to get mad at you every time that you hug them? And if he does, where does he draw the line? Will he get mad at you for simply talking to another boy next? Or looking at one? Is he going to demand that you can't have friends that are of the opposite sex? That's unfair. What are you supposed to do, avoid anyone with a penis? That may be difficult, considering about half the population is male.
My ex-boyfriend had a lot of faults, I admit. And while he did confess that he was insecure, and often became jealous of one male friend inparticular, he realized that he was over-reacting and being unfair. He never demanded that I stop talking to this person, or that I not demonstrate friendly affection towards this person either. If he was feeling jealous, he simply said so, without accusing me of being unfaithful in some way. Then I re-assured him, and he admitted that he felt awful silly because he did trust me. He knew that I would never, ever deliberately hurt him. Especially by being unfaithful.
Bottom line: I say write that letter. But remember that you aren't the one that needs to apologize, he is.
]
Writing your boyfriend a love letter is a great idea. Be personal, be specific (say WHY you love him, WHAT it is that makes him great, HOW he makes you feel special, etc.)
However, confessing your actions with this other snowboard guy is probably something you should do in person, not in a letter. Make these two separate things.
In private, in person- talk to your boyfriend, and tell him the truth about what happened with the snowboard guy. Explain why you did what you did, explain that it didn't mean anything, and that you DO love him, and listen to him. Tell him you want to fix it, since it seems he's hurt. Listen to him- let him explain how he feels. Hopefully you'll work it out.
Do the letter seperately, and when you write it and give it to him, let it be for no other reason than the fact that you love him. (or perhaps "love" is too strong of word... but you know how you feel, not me)
]
Forty-two
]
you should tell him you love him and that you were only hugging the guy, and ask him to forgive you. do that and hope for the best!!! hope i helped!!!
]
well first of all he probably only got really upset because he loves you and doesnt want to lose you! just start by telling him the truth and apologizing for lying to him and just say i didnt want you to get mad because i really love you and i dont want anything to ever happen between us, and say a hug is nothing.. you give your best friends hugs even just regular friends, he wouldnt stop bothering me and i just wanted him to leave me alone. hes probably just a bit jealous and if yall just talk it out i know he will get over it! this is a silly little thing that doesnt even matter. he wanted to make out with you big deal, you said no, because you love ur boyfriend! trust me.. he will understand. but you have to tell him the truth and not keep lying about it because if you dont tell him somehow he might find out and that is much worse than you confessing a lie. and the thing about him getting mad and people thinking that is obsessive! well they are totally wrong. not obsessive at all, he just cares alot about you! soo dont worry about what other people think, and about the letter thing just think and make everything you say come from your heart and truly mean it. tell him things like how your life has been the best its even been since hes came into your life and that these 7 months have probably been the best months our of your whole life! after you talk to him even put stuff in the letter that you said to him in person and say how you screwed up majorly and that you shouldnt of even given the guy a hug! and just tell him over and over and over how much you love him and how you dont know where youd be without him! the letter thing is a really great idea.. he'll love it!
]
More Questions: |