So there's this guy I like who likes me back.. the only reason we're not going out is because he lives in another city really far away. But its sort of understood that we have this thing going on. Anyway.. he's always talking about how hard it is for him to communicate openly with girls considering he doesnt have many female friend... ha yeah right. I just so happened to have guessed his email password (wrong I know.. but I have it and now I cant just not have it anymore!) and he has a ton of emails from all sorts of girls. There are "xoxo"'s and "love so and so"'s everywhere!!! I know Im not technically supposed to be mad considering Im not supposed to have been in there anyway.. but I cant help it. Is there anyway I can confront him about the girls.. ask him if there's someone else.. without him knowing I went in his email? Or should I shake it off and leave him and his email alone?
Cath answered Sunday March 27 2005, 4:09 pm: Hi Sweetie,
OK, reading his email without his concent wasn't exactly something Jesus would do (l.o.l.) but you know that as I can see from what you wrote to me. However wha's done is done, so feel free to be pissed off. ...HOWEVER he CANNOT know you went to his email. If he does HE will be pissed off and manage to turn the situation on you. ...This makes the confrontation difficult.
I don't know exactly what you want to do, but this is what I would do. I'd go to his email account a few more times (from a pc nobody would find out I'm checking his email on) to investigate a litle bit more. ...Exactly what kind of relationship do these girls have with him? Is he leading them on... going out with any of them... are they just internet whores... chick friends he denied having... or something else. ...If you already have figured it out then skip this step. This step isn't much help... but it's always good to be SURE of something then to be unsure. ...Maybe he has some weird mental illness and sents emails to himself pretending he's some chick (I highly doubt it, but it's just an example of how it's better to be sure of things than usure).
Once you figured that out you talk to him. Maybe the emails will give you clues on what to say... like if he ever meets the girls in public you can say that a friend (never give out this friend's name... just say "A friend") "thinks" he/she saw him with someone on the same date one of the email chicks arranged for him and her to hang out somewhere. If he reacts too defensive then that's a bad sign. ...Then you should just shake it off and start looking around for Plan B guys incase the situation with your guy gets worst.
In my experience letting guys know you honestly like them gives them something to think about when other girtls are flirting with them and gives them something to have in their conscious. Tell him once and say it clearly that you like him. ...Then it would be a good time to ask if there's someone else he might be interest in. ...You know him and you might even know body language habbits he does when he's lying so examine how he responds your question. Don't just take his word for it.
I'm sorry my answer is so long, but I have some OTHER ideas you might want to try. Send him an email or an e-card and then when you're in a room with him (...but he lives in another city... just in case you are in a room with him) that has a computer and interet access tell him you want to see the email you send him and don't take no for an answer.
Whatever you do he must NEVER know you were on his email. I'm sorry I can't help much. I have never been in this situation myself. Well take care and good luck!!! Have a nice day. ~Blessed Be... [ Cath's advice column | Ask Cath A Question ]
openears answered Sunday March 27 2005, 3:19 pm: ok it could be a joke i one time did that to one of my friends i mean who know rubber ducky was such a comman password go to yahoo make a free e-mail account and be like its sharh (example)so funny in school today kisses gallor love ooo muck byeness xoxox. and see what he says he could be liying to you but on the other hand relationships are built on trust [ openears's advice column | Ask openears A Question ]
pretty_n_punk09 answered Sunday March 27 2005, 10:32 am: Just forget him. He lied to you and you found out, even though it was a lil wrong, but theres nothing wrong with a lil detective work :). He must not like you if he lied to you because he obviously knows how to communicate with girls. I say you just let him go or, if you really wanna know if there's another girl in his life, just be straight with him. "Is there any other girl in your life?". It doesn't matter if he asks why your asking him that, just make up something, like saying he's acting like he's not that into you anymore. Good luck on whatever you decide to do.
shake answered Sunday March 27 2005, 1:31 am: Start sending rude emails back to the chicks then he'll be telling you the truth when he doesnt have any girl friends. [ shake's advice column | Ask shake A Question ]
TheTeenGirl answered Sunday March 27 2005, 1:25 am: I think you should let this guy go. He just sounds like a guy who plays with peoples' hearts, and obviously all those girls could be victims. This is an online guy right? If it is, I don't think any guilt should be felt about guessing his password and seeing that many girls are falling for him. Hes a probably a cheater, so don't let yourself love this guy any longer, block him. Thats what I say.
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