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Best Friend or Boy Friend?
(13/f)My friend, Amy, got me together with a guy called Wayne as a joke because nobody likes Wayne. But I started to really like him. I could tell him anything. He was my best friend. However, he can't stay out of trouble and I found out his grades are really low. So I broke up with him. Now he says he wants me back but he won't change to meet my standards He says he'll try but he doesn't put forth much effort. I told him I just wanted to be friends but it's hard for me because I'm not over him yet. I still want to treat him like a boyfriend. What should I do?
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Hi Sweetie,
If he really likes you he has to put effort into things from him part. He may not quite understand that though, so you will have to make it clear that you want him to be more focused. You're goimng to have to treat him as "just-a-friend" for a while and give him some space (although he may try to follow you around and call you all the time). Once he sees you're serious and that you care about him enough to want him to have good gardes and stuff and that its the only way to get you back he will do it. Once you start seeing him TRYING to get better grades then you can start getting closer again. Just don't demend too much... just ask him to "try" to stay out of trouble. If he doesn't... tell him to "try" harder. The key is to NOT say "do it" but "TRY to do it". Hehe. He'll do it.
My best wishes!!! Take good care!!! ~Blessed Be...
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Instead of telling him to get his grades up and letting him loose, get back together if you really like him. Meet him somewhere and help him with homework, (but don't do it for him!) and give him alot of encouragement. Instead of condeming him when he gets into trouble, help him straighten himself out, and offer different solutions to what he could have done instead. Some people just need that extra little push, and maybe you're the right one to do it.
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well you should see how he reacts to getting back together. he might want his reward in advance to doing his work. you might motivate him or something.
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well since his grades are dropping you should help him study or have him do extra credit.. something like that, tell him that you still want to go out with him and everything and then he might change
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His grades shouldn't be a problem with your realationship. I mean that's his problem and if you like him you should still stay with him.
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he shouldn't have to be up to your standards frankly his grades are his business.. I understand that you want the best for him.. but if your going to judge your relationships on grades of the boys you date.. then you might missing out on some great relationships... just express your concern for him... but that should be no reason to not date him.. although if by dating you gets in the way of his studies.. then just tell him you won't talk to him everyday after school or make plans with him until all of his homework is done.. that way hes motivated to do it... its different by saying you won't do something.. then by saying you have to change for me ... hope you understand
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Follow your heart. If you really truly like him, then go for it. You can meet half way on the standards. Talk to him and set certain limits. Don't make them too extreme too fast. Take it slow, if he really cares for you then he'll try his best.
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If you like him, I'd say go with it. Maybe, you could both put forth an effort to meet eachothers standards. You can still like him and use will power to not do things you know you wouldn't normally do. Encourage him to work hard and help him too! Hope I helped!
~K~
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