|
Boyfriend going away for college...
Hey...I don't really think you can help much with this, but I'm curious to see what you think of it all. This is probably gonna be long. Sorry.
Okay. My boyfriend and I are really close in every way. We love each other completely, and we're technically engaged. The only thing is...he'd told me he was staying here for college, but then he went on a trip with his family to see the rest of their family this break, and all of a sudden decided he wants to go there for college. That would be a four year separation, maybe more, and I don't know how to handle it. He went away this summer for 2 months and it, like, killed me. I can't imagine not seeing him for a year. We're not going to break up or anything, and I'm not going to try to make him stay (though I'd like to) because he'd resent me, I'm sure, if I did. I don't want to make him stay here for me, but he's planning to go to tech school. Can't he just stay here? I would go with him, but there are absolutely no good vocal programs where he's planning to go, and I already got accepted into a college here that does. (I'm doing vocal performance as my major).
Anyway...I don't know what to do. I almost don't want to talk to him about it because I'll end up crying and making him feel bad, then feeling bad about making him feel bad. Lol. Plus, I hate for him to see me cry.
So...anything to say?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
If I were you, i would have to handle it and try to keep in much contact as possible. I would talk to him over the phone, computer and even in chats on your phones. Don't let this mess with your head, visit him on breaks and weekends and ask him if he'll come see you when you can't go up to him. Just make sure this doesn't affect your love life. I hope my advice helps!!
]
okay well it might be hard when he goes away but he will be getting and education in a carrer and if its ment for you to , to be married then its gonna be a big deal if he doesnt go to collage. and you will always see him on holidays. and be able to talk on the phone and the computer by email or instant messaging Good Luck-Ashlee-
]
You need to talk to your boyfriend about this, and go through the options together. Explain that you can't realistically go to college where he wants to go because of the course you want to do, so he understands that if he goes away to college, you are going to be in a long-distance relationship. He may well just not have thought things through in the excitement of finding this place, and once he realises the practical implications, he'll reconsider.
If he really wants to go, talk about whether you think the two of you could cope with a long-distance relationship and not seeing each other very often. Long-distance tends to exaggerate any already existing tension points in the relationship, and you have to both be willing to really work on maintaining the relationship, or it just ends in hurt. I think if you honestly wouldn't cope with a long-distance relationship and he's absolutely certain he wants to go away to college, then you have to be fair to yourself and break up now. If you can't do it, save yourself the heartache. It sounds harsh, but it will hurt less than having your relationship slowly crumble, and perhaps having such a strong stance will make your boyfriend realise how much he'll loose by insisting on going to college far away. Good luck, and all the best.
]
Coming from a long distance relationship myself, I can understand your concern. The thing of it is, it's relatively easy. You'll be able to talk on the phone, write letters, and maybe visit sometimes.
If you love him then just talking to him should be able to ease your mind a bit.
Stay strong, it'll all work out.
]
you can take a trip every two weeks or whatever and go visit him! and if he really loves you, he wont do anything with another girl..plus if he does..ill beat his ass! lol
]
This is a hard one...Because either way one of you are giving up something...You can give up your chance to go to college to be with him or you can try and get him to stay...but either way one of you are giving up your dreams...You guys just really need to talk and all that stuff! Hope I helped
]
Dear College-Relationship Dilemma,
You seem to care a lot about this relationship. You are going at extra lengths to get others opinions on the choices that are being made here. It is obvious in black and white that you are stuck and you have no idea what to do, because if you did you would not be here in the first place. If this relationship is so important to you and your fiance, you both will find a way to make it work. He is your fiance, right? You both are lacking on your communication skills. This move will change the rest of both of your lives. Grab your fiance and sit him down for a little one on one talk about everything. Do not leave anything out. You might risk your relationship on it. Long distance relationships are so hard and I don not like seeing people go through them; but if it is true love then the distance will never matter. Good luck.
♥Sarah
]
okay!i no thats a really hard thing to have to do so here is what i have to say..Try telling him how much you really want him to stay..also...you seem the age that u will be choosing a college also so maybe you should go with him...if that doesnt work then allways visit him!!
DB
]
aw hun i'm sorry, maybe if he goes to the college down there he will make better money because he might be going to a better school, you know how that works.. but hopefully he'll decide to stay around here, i dont really know how to put it, but my bf and i have been together for over a year now, and hes a senior and hes planning on staying here and going to a local college until i'm out of highschool, but then sometimes he has these crazy ideas about going to the marines, and i dont wanna bring up about anything after highschool, cuz the same thing happens to me, it just makes me want to cry because not seeing him like for a long time just hurts me! well i hope he'll change his mind or something. x0 Renee
]
More Questions:<<< Previous Question: Pores
| Next Question >>>
|
|