well i have had many boyfriends in the past but they all have been behind my parents back because if i tell them they r gonna begin with (this is them)"ur gonna get pregnent mess up ur future not get a job!!!" and so on but im not cause i respect myself and know when things go to far and i dont like the idea of being with a boi behind my parents back anymore and i wanna tell them now but i dont know how without them acting all mad and crazy.so any ideas ppl?
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Families? JamesBaybiGurl answered Sunday January 30 2005, 1:24 pm: Heyy Be'Be Girl, Thats really good that your not wanting to hide it anymore. My mom gives me that same speach but the wierd thing is she accepts the fact that I have a bf. She met him and everything and likes him alot. But I went out with this boy like last year and all I did was kiss hug..you kno and my mom loved him as much as I did..And like I started spendin alot of time with him, And I swear I kept the house clean my room everything, so that way if I wanted to do stuff everything was always clean, and she got into an argument with me one night and told me I never do anything im always with my bf and Im probably gonna end up gettin pregnent messin up my dreams of becomin a soccer played ill drop outa school wont get a job, everything you could think of. And I told my aunt how I felt cause we are reaaally close and she told me that if my mom really cares about me and stuff and I told her that you kno I respect my body more then anything and I am not gonna go do that because I have alot of respect for my parents to..And she told me that if they ever brought it up again to tell them, I told my mom exactly how I felt and never again has she said anything like that to me. I feel ya I used to cry and everything when they told me that because it hurt alot. So I understand best bet is to tell your mom next time she says anything that u respect her and ur body and you would never do anything to hurt the family by bringing another life into the world!!
Katie answered Wednesday August 4 2004, 2:26 pm: It's good that you don't want to go behind your parents back anymore. I give you a lot of props for that. All I can tell you to do is be honest. Maybe find a way for them to trust you more. Show them your responsible and that you know when to say "no". Get on their good side also. Let your parents know how much you care for your current boyfriend. Have them meet him. And in time, they will accept him. Most parents have a hard time dealing with the fact that their kids are growing up. But they will get used to it. If they freak out on you, be hard on them as well - but in a respectful way. Keep the convosation going by TALKING not yelling. That's the only way to get to conclusions. Find out where they are coming from. And make sure they know where you are coming from. I hope I helped
Goodluck and God Bless!
<3
PS: I know it sucks with your parents not being able to take you dating but trust me (ive had experience with this) everything will be okay. [ Katie's advice column | Ask Katie A Question ]
xoMarisox answered Wednesday August 4 2004, 9:48 am: Usually with boys I like to bring it up with my mom. I know how you feel so maybe if your parents saw you with a boy or know that you call or IM him they would start to relize that you are growing up and are mature enough for this situation. Or go up to your mom or dad and say: "Hey Joe Shmo wants to know if I could go to the movies with him? I'll be back by ___. See what they say. Hope I helped! Good luck! xoxo,Maris [ xoMarisox's advice column | Ask xoMarisox A Question ]
kevin1986 answered Wednesday August 4 2004, 2:18 am: If you're not having sex with them,then you're not going to get pregnant. Your parents sound very controlling if they have no confidence in you whatsoever about being smarter than that. Unfortunately,that's how your parents are and that's how they'll stay for the rest of your life. They'll always view you as a baby who can't think for herself? What can you do? Well,you're gunna have to tell them,"Mom,Dad, why do you treat me like a child when it comes to guys? Don't you think you raised me better than that? Why do you feel that I'm too stupid to go out with anyone?" You can make up some more stuff too. [ kevin1986's advice column | Ask kevin1986 A Question ]
xShAdYzBaBi3x answered Wednesday August 4 2004, 12:14 am: Well I would tell ur mom first because I think ur mom will b more understanding bcuz she's probably gone through the same thing.. Just tell her next time b like yah. this boy asked me out.. and see wat she says. Just explain to her that ur responsible enough to not to do that sorta stuff. Im sure she'll be fine with it!! I hope I helped!! any other ?'s just ask!! I hope everythin goes well! <3 x0x [ xShAdYzBaBi3x's advice column | Ask xShAdYzBaBi3x A Question ]
LEFTalone answered Wednesday August 4 2004, 12:13 am: just straight up tell ur parents u r not a baby and u can take care of urself and ur old enought to take care of yourself in bad situations... also ur parents cannot control who u date so tell them no matter wut they do u can always have a boyfriend so they need to accecpt that. tell me how it works out.
much <3.
--later.! [ LEFTalone's advice column | Ask LEFTalone A Question ]
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