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I shave my legs,
I sit down to pee.
And I can justify any,
Shopping spree.
Don't go to a barber,
But a beauty salon.
I can get a massage
Without a hard-on.
I can balance the checkbook,
I can pump my own gas.
Can talk to my friends,
about the size of my ass.
My beauty's a masterpiece,
and yes, it takes long.
At least I can admit,
To others when I'm wrong.
I don't drive in circles,
at any cost.
And I don't have a problem,
admitting I'm lost.
I never forget,
an important date.
You just gotta deal with it,
I'm usually late.
I don't watch movies,
with lots of gore.
Don't need an instant replay,
to remember the score.
I won't lose my hair,
I don't get jock itch.
And just cause I'm assertive,
Don't call me a bitch.
Don't say to your friends,
Oh yeah, I can get her.
In your dreams, my dear,
I can do better
Flowers are okay,
But jewelry's best.
Would you look at my face,
Instead of my chest
I don't have a problem,
With Expressing my feeling.
I know when ur lying,
You look at the ceiling.
Don't call me a girl,
A babe or a chick.
I am a WOMAN,
Get it, you prick?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Gift Giving?
haha.. ive seen that like 2 yrs ago though.. in a email though.. but it never does get old lol i dont think you made it up though-trix
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Birthed the universe
Is all a man is and more--
Goddess is woman
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That has got to be the best thing I have ever read.
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Haha! I love that poem! (except I like gory movies too...^^;) Heh....wonderful!
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i like that
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Wow. That is basically all the problems with gus summed up into one great poem.
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I think maybe you should lose the text speak but otherwise it's good.
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Of the 5 poems you posted, this is also my favorite. I like the angry, cynical, sarcastic poems. Anger works better than depression, as long as you don't hurt anyone with it (like in a poem.) It energizes.
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