I'm an 18-year-old girl who is cheerful,understanding and a good friend. I like to listen to other people's problems and give advice. I've been told I give good advice,so I decided to start an advice column on this site. I have good qualities and I'm aware of them,but people always mistake that for being stuck up. A person who is stuck up only thinks they're great and tries to show it to everyone. A person who isn't (me) is aware of what they're worth,but have no need to show everyone,because the right people will always acknnowledge them. If you want to ask anything,feel free to. I will really pay attention to what you're telling me and answer the best way possible. I'm looking forward to being a good Advicenator :)
Gender: Female
Location: Serbia
Occupation: Student
Age: 18
Member Since: January 4, 2013
Answers: 7
Last Update: January 14, 2013
Visitors: 1727
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F/16
We've been in a relationship for 4 months now, the first 3 months was all sweet, we would talk for hours, we would talk about the future together and having children, they wouldn't be a moment in a day where we wasn't texting or on the phone. After the 3 months, we started constantly arguing because the lack of communication, jealousy, effort and etc. After we would argue, we would make up, but nothing would be the same anymore, I'd try making plans, talking about the future, just so it would go back to normal, but it wouldn't, somehow I felt like he's withdrawing, he wouldn't share his idea's on the future anymore, he would start to seem bored with our texting and phone calls and he wouldn't make plans into doing things with me. We argue almost all the time, then once we makeup, nothing is the same. I feel emotionally attached to him, I feel like I need him because I can't see my life without him, I see him in my future when we're settled down with children, I love everything about him, his flaws make him more perfect to me, I'm unsure whether this is love or infatuation and I'm confused whether he does care. Since a couple of days we've been arguing and not really speaking, I asked him if he even cared and he told me to go away. Can this relationship even be saved? I explain myself to him and what I'm feeling but it doesn't seem like the understands my feelings and words, a week or so ago, I ignored him and used the no-contact rule because the lack of communcation and I felt like I wasn't being cared about, then he texted me within 2 days and he was making the effort and it felt like US at the start of our relationship, but once we started talking and I started making much more effort (because when he texted, I never really made an effort into speaking) but then I started to and he went back to the way he was again. Has anyone got any tips on what I can do? If this is love or infatuation? Can this relationship be saved? Or do I just let it go and move on? Also, he told me to go away after I asked if he cared, I'm not going to text him, but he'll text me now he knows I'm not communicating, how should I respond? In what attitude and what do I say? (link)
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I can't really tell you what to do or say,but this is my honest opinion. This guy is definitely confusing when it comes to showing feelings. First,he's all lovey-dovey,then he's cold,then he starts acting like he cares once you start giving him the cold shoulder. What you feel might very well be love,but it also might not be. Either way,this is starting to be one-sided love. Sorry,but this guy is just not worth it. You're 16. Think about it: a girl like you,young,probably beautiful and smart,holding onto one guy like there are no others? Please don't do that. I'm just a bit older than you and I've gone through the same thing,but it just won't work. There's nothing you can do,aside from keep using the no contact rule. Show him he can't take you for granted,and give him the taste of his own medicine. Once you feel ready,dump him. The sooner,the better. It may sound cliche,but you really do deserve better. No girl deserves a guy who will be like that. I know how it hurts to be treated like that. That's why I'm telling you all this. The point is:you need to end this,and by no means should you let him talk you into continuing to be with him. Hope this will help you.
Good luck,whatever you decide to do.
StarPrincess
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i cant store book language in my mind (link)
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Try to do so by drawing pictures which will help you remeber it more easily. Or write some sort of famoous sentences which include the language you're having trouble with. It's not all that hard.
Hope I helped somewhat.
StarPrincess
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I just dumped my boyfriend of two month's two weeks ago.Why?
Because he told my brother to tell me that we are still together,but he's also dating someone else.I was really hurt.So I broke up with him.I told him to never talk to me,and I gave him all his gifts back.
But the wierd thing is,I miss him,and wish he would talk to me.
I also found out from his best friend that he cheats on alot of girls.
I feel like it's my fault he cheated on me,even though it's not.
He only did it,because I wouldn't kiss him.
I'm just confused as to what I should do.Should I give up,and accept that we were not meant to be?Or should I try to fix things? (link)
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Fix it? No. Cheating should never be forgiven. And I mean NEVER. If he really liked you,there would be no reason to cheat on you. I know you're hurt and that you may still have feelings for him. But if you get back with him,he will keep cheating and you will be unhappy. Guys like that don't change. Besides,if his best friend told you so,it must be true,because guys wouldn't normally say that about their best friends. Don't punish yourself with that kind of a relationship and that kind of guy. In time,find a guy who will make sure you know you are all he needs,and who proves it every day. Wasting time on losers is not what you need. You are absolutely not at fault because he cheated. Don't ever feel like that. Hope I helped.
Best wishes,
StarPrincess
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Okay well im 18, me and my ex boyfriend ended like 7 months ago. The problem is that well yeah he dumped me and such and like im not over him and i know he ain't too.
What bothers me is that he says he doesn't care what i do and stuff... as in date someone else (even though i haven't dated anyone after him)
so then on twitter he goes on like he cares, it's as if he doesn't like me being happy since i show it on twitter... even though he doesn't exactly know i feel ...
why does it feel as if he don't want me happy? does he still care and feel the same?
we decided to be friends well since he came back to me, lol what makes me mad is that he said he missed our friendship but doesnt bother communicating with me? i bet it's cause he knows im there. Well too bad i'm not cause i don't want him to see that i care anymore, he obviously doesn't care..
i know he goes out with girls and stuff, i actually don't see why he said 'lets be friends?' must that mean something? on new years it was me who wished him a new years, not him..
he got drunk and said all these things at the end he was like how he misses me..
next morning he goes he was chatting rubbish typical right?
ah i acc don't know what to do anymore this sucks cause i do feel alot for him ah please try help me... (link)
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Just move on. As you can see,he's constantly on and off about how he feels. I'm sure you're a great girl and you deserve someone who will come clean with their feelings. You can't know how he feels,as sad as it may sound. Guys are just like that. I've been there. You don't need to date someone right away. Give yourself time to heal and get over it. But whatever you do,DO NOT get back with this guy. It's bad for your health,cause you seem to be stressing out too much. It worked for me. Later,I found a great guy who treated me right. Still does. Don't cling on to him. It's over. Gone. What you can do now is try to entertain yourself or go out with friends to help you stop thinking about him. This guy sounds like trash. And you don't go picking up trash after you throw it away. So just relax and live on.
Good luck,
StarPrincess
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hello,
i have been dating my bf for 10 months now and when we were first together i fell for him very fast. without really getting to know each other we kind of jumped in a relationship. However, now i feel that everything he does kind of makes me mad, i dont think i made him work hard enough for me. he doesnt bring me flowers or take me out. things seem like theyve faded, im not as attracted to him and he gets on my nerves very easily. when i go out with the girls i love the fact that i can just forget about him and go have harmless flirtation with guys. i love my bfs family and friends, they mean so much to me and i really dont want to lose them. I still love him but the spark isnt there i feel and he has a full time job so in the nights he wants to hang out but im going to school and i need to do my home work and he doesnt understand. i think i am over thinking everything so i need someone elses help ! please!!!
thanks
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Relationships aren't about him bringing you flowers or taking you out. You got it all wrong. Just because he doesn't love you the way you want him to,doesn't mean he doesn't love you the best way he can. Just saying. Maybe you're expecting too much from him. Yes,you are over thinking and over reacting. No relationship is ideal. You need to tone it down a notch. Romance dies out after some time. I've been dating my bf for a year and a half. He's definitely not as romantic as he was when we started dating. But he shows love in in different ways,although he seems cold sometimes. Just because it isn't the same,doesn't mean he has lost interest. And you shouldn't either. You say you love him. But the spark isn't there. It doesn't need to be. Feelings are enough. It's enough if you can just spend time with him and feel at ease. Sure,I sometimes flirt harmlessly too with other guys,but that doesn't mean I don't love my bf. It's good that you can find something else to do rather than just thinking about him all the time. The point is-everything is just fine. Calm down a little and you'll see it was all in your head. Good luck.
StarPrincess
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frinds i just wanna share something with you all hope may some one help me out.
im n love since two years, but unfortunatly she never try to understand me :/
thats true she love me and i trust her as well
but she dont :/ honestly i love her since im with her i never even think about someone
she always need a time i give her as i can bec i work and some time cant pull time for her but every night i talk with her on cell
she need 3 to 4 hours but i cant as im so far :( she alawys give me hard time like u did not msg bhal bhal bhal i explian her many time after all my try she dont understand me she always give me alot of tens what i doooooooooooooooooo ? please some one help me out thx regards (link)
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Ok,this is going to sound harsh. Love IS understanding. Which means that she doesn't really love you if she's acting like that. My ex boyfriend was like that when I was really busy with school. We live in the same town and all,but I was just too busy and had a bunch of things to work out,not only school related. We were together for nearly a year. I loved him with all my heart. But he kept accusing me of not having time for him. He'd never listen to me. I'd try to explain every single day but no. Called him every night. Do you know what he did? He said that I'm obsessed with school and other things and that I will never find someone because of that.
I have certain goals I want to achieve and that's my priority. I can tell your job is important to you and that you are working hard. Basically,the point of my little story here is that she just isn't the one if she can't understand you. I know you love her and I know long relationships hurt as hell when they end. But are you really going to put up with emotional abuse? Because that's what this is. Don't go all hate on me,I'm just being honest. I'm not gonna tell you to break up with her. I can't make decisions for you. But think about it-is that kind of girl really what you need? When you figure that out,you will know whether you should stay or leave.
Good luck no matter what you do.
StarPrincess
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I had sex with my boyfriend and he wore a condom, but the next day my period started. I always have regular periods, but this one was two weeks early. Can having sex make you start your period? (link)
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It happened to me too. And everything was ok after that. It seems that it can start your period,in fact,it started mine a couple of times. It is nothing to worry about. If you still feel worried,don't hesitate to visit your doctor. But for me,it turned out alright.
StarPrincess
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