Dear 21/F
Diet, exercise, and vacations are all great sources of stress relief; however after reading your question, I suspect you have access to these common sources of stress relief. True stress relief starts from the mind. We as humans beings then to feel stressed (when we feel we are not succeeding) from our attempts to exert control over a situation we expect to have control over.
So it's perfectly normal to have an attitude of intensity over school grades and exams, but what about your crohn's in the equation? Coupled with your kitten and two jobs? In your situation it appears a distinction must be made between what is urgent and unimportant and what is important but not urgent. School is always going to be challenging and demanding, friends will let you down, now and again, and you also have to deal with your health. It sounds like the only way you can successfully reduce stress is to achieve a true sense of peace in your mind. I would suggest the services of a therapist.
Good luck and take things easy,
Ugo

Dear 28yr old,
If expenses are an issue, I would strongly recommend group counseling. For a fraction of the cost, you can receive the help you need and support from other group members going through the same challenges you are currently facing. If you are employed and or have health insurance, your carrier should cover costs for mental health counseling, most health insurance companies do so these days. There are also lots of literature out in the market today that provide self help information for others in your position. I would encourage you to simultaneously explore all options; as even though you are able to intellectualize what changes you have to make in your life, you will need all the support you can get, as years of habit will be challenging, but possible to change.
Best of luck.

Your grief is normal for women who have gone through what you have. It sounds like you deeply regret your decision and you are beating your self up. I would advise that you seek counseling, because you need to forgive yourself. This incident while it is one you regret, is a symbolic one, because it represents a lot of life lessons for you to learn which will help you prosper in the future. However if you continue to wallow in depression, you will not be in a healthy state of mind to adequately process the experience. Your experience did not occur in vain; forgive yourself, you are worthwhile and you deserve to be forgiven.

I do support you in seeing a therapist, it sounds like you struggle with the unknown, and you try cope by asserting control over situations. Learning to let things go and accept the things that are out of your power will go a long ways in helping get over your anxiety attacks. It however takes time, hard work and plenty of support.
Good luck.

All factors play a role in having a relationship. While I am curious as to how you know you are autistic and who diagnosed you with the disorder and when? The important thing is that your issues with shyness and low self esteem is a big factor, and you gaining strength over this issue will give you permission to take risks, be assertive and meet women on your own terms.

-Good luck.

It's sounds like the support you are currently receiving from your family could be better. First and foremost, your health is the most important thing at stake here, and I would suggest you see the doctor she is referring you to. As far as money is concerned, your school psychologist should be able to direct you to community resources which can financially aid you with your clinical fees. That being written, I suspect the reason your family is reluctant for you to sign the form is because they are probably afraid that your personal information could be leaked to the wrong parties, (think prospect college). Before you sign the form, understand what you are signing and the terms of confidentiality which come with it. While confidentiality is never fully guaranteed, since you are 18, you can set reasonable boundaries (in writing) with your school psychologist and you new psychologist regarding your expectations on who has access to your records.
Good Luck.

Based on the manner and consistency of the composition of your question, I wouldn't be in a hurry to jump into conclusions about your mental health.
Your first two symptoms sound more like a potential hearing problem than anything else. My advice to you is to get your hearing checked. As a matter of fact I will further suggest you get your self a full physical, so you can get a peace of mind.
Your tendency to become easily angered in public, coupled with you feeling your heart rate increase, might be you experiencing an anxiety attack.
I don't have enough information to render an advice, pertaining to you seeing small animals that others claim not to see, because it very well could go both ways. In regards to you actually experiencing a hallucination, or more than likely you really do see what's actually there. (Keep in mind, that small animals tend to be shy, and move very fast.)
I don't think you are going crazy, I suspect you might struggle with anxiety issues, and you might want to get your hearing checked.
Good luck.

I would say that your depression is due to situational factors, and from the sound of things the events that taken place in your life are things you can do absolutely noting about. It's normal to feel saddened over a break up, we have no control over how people feel about us. It's also normal for anyone in your situation to feel saddened with your family life. But what can you do about your mother and sister? Nothing, except praying for them to get better, and for your father to be a more patient person. I wonder if your sleepiness is due to you fretting over what you can do to make your current situation better. My best advice is for you to find someone you can talk to and get a lot away from your chest. Perhaps a counselor at school? I would say that besides airing out your grievances, you can also work with a counselor to learn to cope more effectively with painful situations that are beyond your control.
Good luck.

Everyone has their degree of personal space, so on the surface there is nothing wrong if your bubble is a lot bigger than most people you know. However, if you feel uncomfortable with the physical distance you prefer from people, such as you can't resist the urge to move a few seats away from your friend, even though you don't want to. It wouldn't hurt to explore with a therapist, your personal history and understand the origins of your preferred physical distance from others.

Most colleges should provide free mental health counseling services for their students, as well as free medical services. It should be factored into your tuition. My advice is for you to consult with the student services department, (or whatever they are called) to find out the services students are entitled to.

It's sounds that common sense tells you that you are jumping to conclusions, when you feel everyone hates you, but your heart tells you a different story. There are plenty of things you can do to get better, but it is a process, and a process best archived through counseling. Things don't have to be severe in your life to receive counseling, ever heard the phrase, “prevention is better than cure?” Your fear of everyone hating you is not what I would call paranoia, perhaps a combination of being hypersensitive and anxious. One method you can use to ease your fears is through logical reasoning? You can always ask yourself a question like, “Have I done anything to warrant being hated?” (If you have, forgive yourself, make amends and move on.) You can also use reminders like, “I prefer to be liked by everyone, but that's not always going to be the case and I can deal with it. Most importantly always see and appreciate the good in you, and others.

I understand where you are coming from if you have no desire to continue using medication. However one thing that helps is learning and implementing behavioral coping skills for those intense moments, combined with medication. Perhaps you can consider learning coping skills while taking a lower dosage? (Easier written than done).You getting better from your issues with anxiety is not going to happen overnight and it sounds like your medication has helped take the edge of things in the past.
Good luck.

It's not unusual for people to experience visual and auditory hallucinations. Such events usually occur during the wake/sleep circle. However if you are hearing a running commentary of voices in your head, or see images (not there) for longer than two seconds interacting with you, then you should seek consultation with a psychotherapist. Schizophrenia is a combination of delusions, hallucinations, and importantly, a disorganized form of thinking, which is revealed through speech and written words. Another sign of schizophrenia is just a general apathy towards daily hygiene. It sounds like you struggle mostly with anxiety, and as a result, your visual and auditory hallucinations are amplified in your mind. Ether way, it wouldn't hurt to consult with a school counselor to process your stressful thoughts and feelings.
Good luck.

Manic depressive is another term for bipolar, and I would agree with your friend that the symptoms you report are characteristic of the disorder. You are also correct when you write about medication not being the cure all answer, however it shouldn’t hurt. I would suggest you keep an open mind towards all possibilities of getting better and visiting a psychotherapist.

Good luck.

What you have described is consistent with an impulse-control disorder called trichotillomania. People who struggle with this disorder usually complain of an increasing sense of tension before pulling their hair or when they are struggling to resist the temptation o pull their hair. Others report experiencing some level of pleasure or relief from pulling their hair. Now usually, it not always the hair on top the head that gets pulled, it can be hair found on other parts of the body; the eyebrows with some people who suffer from this disorder is not an unusual target.
My advice is you see a therapist, to find out if this is truly what you are going through or get it ruled out. Needless to say it might take a lot of convincing with your mother. I would suggest showing her this response.
Disorders like trichotillomania are usually symptoms of a bigger issue, a coping method of sorts, while not a healthy one. Seeing a therapist should allow you the opportunity to process stressors you might be struggling with which may not be at the fore front of your consciousness.
Good luck.

Panic attacks are brief in duration usually lasting about two to three minutes, and they are intense during the attack. The intensity of panic attacks are so great at people who experience panic attack usually develop a fear of this attack, and this fear sometimes becomes a trigger for more panic attacks, which usually leads to panic disorder. Panic attacks are also accompanied by physiological symptoms, such as a rapid heart beat, excessive sweating, and lightheaded amongst others. Anxiety attacks are also accompanied by physiological symptoms, and the intensity can be just as intense as a panic attack or sometimes milder, it just depends on the person, however the main difference between panic attacks and anxiety attacks is anxiety attacks are longer in duration, and they usually last from days to weeks or more. In regards to your second question, you can experience a panic attack anytime even from your sleep at night. In the case of anxiety attacks, the onset is gradually and usually predictable.

It’s hard not to give you advice in regards to your cutting, because your self mutilating habits and your difficulty in coping with the hurtful things people say to you are all interrelated. So I guess I will give you advice in regards to your self esteem issues, since cutting and a difficulty in dealing with hurtful words are related to feelings of self.
The individuals calling you a self mutilator; seem to be only encouraged more to tease you when you react angrily to their comments. In truth, there is nothing you can do or say to control what comes out of another person’s mouth, so the first part is coming to terms that you have no control over others. The second part is relearning self love. You, like every other human being is worthy of love regardless of the adversities you face, so if you are feeling depressed, humiliated and saddened, treat your self like you would treat a best friend who were feeling sad. You wouldn’t cut or slap a rubber band against a best friend, who came to you for help, would you? Of course not, so treat your self with the same compassion and dignity you deserve. (I am going somewhere with this…)
So the next time someone calls you a self mutilator, you can speak for yourself like you would for a best friend. So instead of resorting to obscene gestures, you can inform the person that;
“Yes, I have a history of self mutilating, and it’s something I am working and improving upon. Just because someone cuts does not mean they have to be subjected to name calling and ridicule.” This may sound corny, but it works. By speaking to the issue, you are refusing to jump on the band wagon to shame yourself, and reassuring yourself that you are worthy of being loved by you, plus, regardless of what the person may say in response, you will feel a lot better about your self by performing that simple act.
I know you don’t want to read this, but as social animals it makes no sense in you going through this by yourself, I applaud you in seeking help through your question, but it would also help if you confided in somebody, (preferably your parents and or a therapist). –Think about it.

Good luck.

Bulimia and Anorexia are both serious and life threatening disorders, the problem is you have described some symptoms which over lap and others which should rule out each diagnosis. At 5’7” weighing in at 131 pounds, it is concerning for you to see yourself as being chubby, your over exercising is another concern, as well as your feelings of guilt and depression when you feel you have eaten too much.
Disorders like anorexia and bulimia as symptoms of a bigger issue, most commonly a fear of rejection or a pronounced need for acceptance. With the popular media constantly depicting “sexy” people, especially women, as being skinny, it would make sense that someone with acceptance issues will attempt to model themselves after a popular image.
In response to your question, my first advice will be for you to see a therapist; I imagine and hope that your mother and sister already are seeing therapists. Secondly, accept yourself unconditionally. Regardless if you see yourself as being chubby, give yourself the self love you deserve, if you feel your stomach is full, pat your self on the back, no one should go hungry. The way to stop your obsessing and guilt associated with eating is to change your beliefs about body images. For example, you can practice telling yourself “chubby people can be sexy too,” (even though I think you’re skinny).
Most importantly, you should see a therapist.
Take care,

P.S 1000-3000 calories a day is a significant difference. I wouldn’t recommend going below 1600 calories per day.

Dear William,

My condolences to what you are going through. Your story is all too familiar and not uncommon from someone suffering from drug and alcohol addiction. My advice is that you need to get into a residential treatment program, it will do two things for you, first you learn the tools you need to get back into a sober lifestyle, and secondly you will get the time out you need from your community in order to get your life back together. Right now not only are you suffering from your addiction, you are also caught up in a negative circle, where you are constantly responding with the same negative responses to the same triggers and people. You need a break.
In regards to your family, I don’t believe they dislike you, I do believe they don’t trust you, but that’s the nature to drug and alcohol addiction. Talk to your family about your need for help, tell them what you are going through, if your family has difficulty to locating resources to get you the help you need, you are more than welcome to email me. I will be happy to give you a list of programs and people who can guide through the initial process. You are not a “stupid” kid; you are actually very bright, for having the insight to recognize you need help.
Good luck and stay safe.

I don’t know what you are preoccupied about, but it sounds that you became really anxious about your disappointment. Perhaps it’s not just the fact that you were disappointed but that you feel this disappointment will become a routine. Either way it sounds like if you don’t learn to accept disappointment, the episode you experienced might happen again and become routine. Disappointments are a part of life, it’s how we learn, one way most people learn to deal with disappointment, is by becoming cognizant of situations and events they have no control over, learning to accept these situations and focusing on the positives. I would suggest seeing a therapist and processing your disappointment and episode.

Ugo is a licensed professional counselor in Arizona. He holds a Bachelors in Psychology and a Masters of Science in Counseling Psychology. He is also the host of Road 2 Resolutions, a web site dedicated to addressing questions on mental health issues and conflict resolution issues.
Please visit Road2Resolutions.com for more questions and monthly newsletters.

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