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October 27, 2007Answers:
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so my prom is coming up, and i don't have a date. my friend from school told me he would take me, but he's taking someone else. so i was thinking of taking my other friend, whom i really really REALLY like.
the only problem is that he doesn't go to my school, and won't know anybody there. i'd feel weird if i go off to talk to my other friends while he just stands around doing nothing. plus, neither of us dance. so we wouldn't have much to do. anyone have any ideas on what i could do?
You really need to talk to him about this. Ask him what he would like to do, and if he would feel comfortable in that situation. Then if he says he doesn't mind, then go ahead and ask him.
Me and my girlfriend of 6 months decided we need some time apart to find ourselves. Its kinda like a break but we dont know if we are actully going to get back toegether. We are takeing time apart because we have started to take each other for granted and we have become people we are not. However we love each other as much as we know. The day was going fine the after we hooked up we sat around and both got crabby, then it all came out. The twist is we are both seniors in high school and we are going to dfferent collges far apart. Is it worth getting back toegether? How do i get her back if even its just as a friend?
Well, if you guys really like eachother then maybe it wouldn't hurt to try to get back together. But, if you have any doubts about this girl whatsoever, you need to just let it go because it's not even worth it. Ask yourself- is this break really hurting me? Can I live without her?
Do you even care that you are taking a break?
Is it hurting you?
Answer these questions, and then tell me how you feel after you have figure that out.
Post as a question on my coulumn.
I would love to further help you:)
Kaila.
Mmmmkay:)
I Think I Need To Be In Tough Love Bootcamp:)
Alright. To Make this Long Story Short,
I Live with My Aunt, Uncle, Little Brother And Younger Cousin. Recently (A Year Today) My Dad Died. So Thats Why My Brother and I Live With Them.
Okay, So Recently My Cousin Got on the Girls Basketball Team, And I Go Twice a week To Her Practices.
She Has A Friend Who's Brother, Who Is Ahhhdorable;)
But Apparently; Has Never had A Girlfriend And "Doesn't like girls" Said His 10 Year Old Little cousin.
No I Know for SURE He Is Not Gay.
He's Just Really Shy. And Thats What I Need Help With.
What Do I Say to A Guy, If He Isn't Even Interested? Or I Dont Even Know If He Does,
Ahhhhh! Help! Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeee:)
xoxox Cassidy
First off, Cassidy..
You need to be yourself.
Do NOT throw yourself at him too much, or make it seem like you are too interested in chasing after him to even bother for him to become friends with you, you don't want a guy to think that.
Secondly,
Just start a casual conversation.
Get his number.
Facebook him.
Get to know him.
Wait a while, and when you have become good friends, then ease yourself into letting him know that you like him.
But do not rush things in too fast.
If you don't think it's worth the wait, then he's not worth your time.
Just, Talk to him.
Okay. I'm a fourteen year old girl and my boyfriend is sixteen (we'll call himm T). We've been dating for a little over three months. I've been hurt in past relationships... a guy only wanted me because he thought he could bang me. But he's the past. I love my boyfriend now. About two months ago I found out something a little shocking. So he used to date this girl (we'll call her B) and I haaaaate her. She goes to a different school, and even before i knew my bf,i severly disliked this girl. I'm not gonna lie though, since ive been dating T ive disliked her even more. I always have thiss problem of comparing myself with her... it sucks. So when i found out that he had fingered her while they were dating it really upset me. Because T promised me, before we started to date, that we would take things reellay slow. Yeah well here I go being stupid and comparing myself. T is perfect. He said that he regretted doing that with her, and that he doesn't expect anything like that from me, he wants to do only what I'm comfortable with. But I really like him... And I don't want to lose him like I did with that otheer guy. Whatever, no excuse. I let him finger me tonight. And now I just don't know... After he did that things were awesome. I felt happy and good about it, and we cuddled and joked around and it was perfect. Then I left his house and we started texting. He was being short with me, and he said he was just tired. I don't know. I was going to call him but he fell asleep... but I really need to talk to him. Truth is, I regret letting hiim finger me. I wish I hadn't... And this sucks because what if he regrets it too? I don't know. I don't know what to do and I'm really confused and I just feel like crying right now but I love him and I just need some help... And the worst part is, I feel like I can't talk to my friends about it. They wouldn't understand... They'd be shocked that I did somthing like that. I know its wiered but they're such good girls and I was too and maybe I still am but I feel so dirty...
You aren't dirty. You shouldn't be ashamed of this. It's something normal that most people our age (i'm 16) do. You need to talk to your best friend. Because he/she is going to be the one that understands you the most, and is going to be the one that is there for you through everything, and if they can't accept you for who you are or the mistakes you make, then they aren't good friends anyway. I know you may not want to hear this, but If your boyfriend had been telling you that you don't have to do anything you don't want to, but he already did this to you.. Then he may not care as much as you think he does. He's not perfect. No one is perfect.
Many girls compare themselves to their boyfriend's girl best friends, or ex girlfriends because they are insecure or scared. You don't have anything to worry about. As long as he isn't cheating, or talking to this other girl like he talks to you, then don't stress so much over it. You are who you are, and he obviously likes you because he is going out with you. But I think that you need to call him or talk to him in person about this, and tell him how you feel. Tell him that you aren't really comfortable doing things like this, and see how he takes it. If he doesn't, then he's not the right one for you.
I hope this helps:)
Please feel free to ask me anything further on my page. I'd love to help.
Kaila(:.
This is a reply to your feedback:
Well, talk to your boyfriend first. You don't have to tell your friend if you don't want to.. But if you ever need someone to talk to about all of this, go to them. Make sure it's okay with your boyfriend first. But, you can't let him make every decision for you.
So I was with a guy for 10 months then I seen an old friend. We knew each other for 5 years and have always liked each other then we exchanged numbers. Well I fell for him and he did me so we broke up with who we were dating and hung out.We had been kinda dating for the last month like saying how we felt having sex and kissing. Well yesterday we went to the movies with some friends and then we got into a fight because I bought the popcorn and he said he should of and I told him that it was fine. Well we got over that then on out ride home I got a text from my ex asking me back out I realized it would have been our anniversary and got a little sad because I still liked him. Well we got back to his place and he said he still loved his ex as well so we agreed that on valentines day we would pick who we wanted and we were both sure it would be the ex. Then he said he was never going back to her cause he loved me and I said that I would make up my mind the 13 and tell him who I pick.I wanted to surprise him when I picked him. Well today he told his ex he was going to be with her on valentines day and we stared fighting and crying now he wont talk to me and I feel like crying. I feel like I love him he has been my friend for 5 years and now he is just leaving without a good bye or anything... Is there something I can do? I don't even care if we date I just love him enough that being friends and seeing him happy would be good enough.
I am going through the same thing as you. I can tell you that it is definatly one of the hardest things that you will ever have to go through- loosing a friend or someone you love to someone else. But, you have to know and ask your self if it is the right thing to let them go. Is it? Or should you continue to chase after him for a long time, not knowing if things are going to work out. You still have your ex, you still like him.. he still likes you. Don't wait around for some guy who is not going to talk to you. It's not worth it. It may seem like it, but it's not. Go for the one who is willing to love you for you, and not love someone else in your place and forget about you. Don't call this other guy, let him call you. And if he doesnt? Forget about it. Let him be happy with this other girl, and don't even worry about it. Always go with the ones that you know will stick around and love you for anything.
I hope this helps.
If you need any further advice,
or you are questioning what I said..
Please leave a question on my column.
I'll be glad to hep you :]
good luck.
i had a weird dream last night, and this girl I've like since 8th grade was in it. it wasn't sexual or anything like that, i cant remember it exactly, but I've had dreams similar to this before with her in it too, i definitely still like her, but i haven't hung out with her in awhile. i go to a different school and stuff now. I don't know why, if it was coincidence but her bf just broke up with her a few days ago too. How can we get reconnected again, without it being awkward? I really really wanna get back with her again
Well, to be honest.. I don't think you need to base anything on dreams. Then again, maybe it's fate. I sure to believe in serendipity, but maybe it's not. If you have her number, call her up and chat for a while, maybe get to know her and her life a little better. Meet for a movie, or dinner. Anything casual- just to get to be friends again. If you don't have her number, then email her or facebook her if you two have a facebook. But, if she doesn't respond, then I think it would be best to let go.
so me and my boyfriend have only been going out for 2 weeks and it will be three on valentine's day. Obviously im not expecting much and neither should he.I feel as though he isn't even going make me a card or get me flowers or anything ,because he hasn't said ONE thing about valentines day.I've mentioned it several times and he barely acknowledges.I wanted to get him this shirt that he picked out that he really likes and some home made cookies and a little card...but i have no clue if he's even going to the trouble to do anything for me .He doesn't drive but I do ,and if he came up with a cute idea for something for us to do on valentines day,i'd be happy to drive..i just don't know ! Do most guys recognize valentine's day ? I don't know what to do!
You know, Some guys don't really have the interest in romantic encounters. They just expect for you to do all of the work, and in hopes that you wont recognize that they really actually haven't done anything to help. It really depends on the guy's personality, wether or not he is going to do something for you. If he seems like the type that might be interested in mushy things- he might be interested in being romantic on valentines day. If he is the kind of guy that is only focused on sports, or seems to be jumping around from girl to girl, he might not be as interested as some other types of guys might be. It would be my best guess to tell you that you need to talk to him before you do anything, and ask him what he would like to do. Don't just wait for him. You need to step up and take charge.
is it possible to love someone who doesn't love them self? i have anorexia nervosa and though my boyfriend has told me he loves me almost every day for a year, i am not so sure that he can if i have such a hard time tolerating myself. i am afraid that he does not love me any longer.
I hope this helps.
A lot of guys pay attention to that stuff, an some of them dont. You really need to be yourself, and love who you are. If your not proud of who you are, others might reflect and catch on. You dont want everyone to know you dont like yourself because they will learn to not like you as well. Never be in a sour mood becuase of something happening in your life. Dont let it show... it will only bring you down more. Besides, if he was a REAL boyfriend, he'd tell you everyday your perfectly imperfect. He would encourage your confidence and brighten your attitude torward both him and yourself.
Please, take my advice, and dont hate yourself.
Remember...
always be yourself no matter what. Dont change for anything, or anyone, anyday.
PS: if he already hasent said something He might not care about it that much... and that can come both good and bad ways.
HOPE I COULD BE MUCH HELP!
good luck!
God bless you!! :]
**Kaila**
Im 14 years old. and im so prude (scared to kiss and stuff) and i was in a relation ship with someone the other day we were going out for a while. he broke up with me because i wouldnt kiss him. He kept asking when hes gonna get his kiss. and i would say idk. and he would hate it . he would get so close to my face to kiss me and i would say stop. Idk what to do. i reallly wanna have my first kiss =/
Dont puch yourself to hard sweetie,
its obvious your not ready yet.
IF you are, like you say, and your sure your ready to have your first kiss, try buying some magazines. read kissing tips and practice. [[not in public though]]
but, if he broke up with you becuase you didnt kiss him, he apperantly isnt the goog guy =)
you'll find the right one. one that will love you for who you are, and what you want to do.
not who he wants you to be, or wants you to do.
hang in there sweetie,
you'll find him. and im sure u'll know when you have, but wait until for your first to be when you want it to be,. not when you feel you have to.
the right guy wont make you feel that need and pressure.
-xoxo-
im here to help, ask any time,
Kaila
Theres this guy I have a crush on, its mutual for sure though. Im running out of things to say when I text him. How can I make him ask about me
If you are texting this guy, and he is texting you back, you can obviously think he is into you. But, if you find yourself trying to be something your not, he's not going to want you to know anymore about you. The odds are, if he hasent asked you to talk about yourself yet, i dont think he's going to unless u speak up. Try to star a convo with him. Go easy at it. Dont say randomly text things ,like, "MARRY ME!" ha ha, you dont want to seem too obvious. But, always remember to be yourself,and he will learn to like you.
(this question is mostly for guys)
what do guys like in girls and what do they dislike in girls?
well, to tell you the truth, guys like a lot of stuff in girls, and they can dislike a lot too. It depends on what guy and what girl...a lot of times, a guy likes a girl to be funny, and fun. Other guys might like a girl he can talk to and be best friends with. Like I said, it just depends. You can certanly write me a question on my column, and i would be glad to answer it...
nice talking to you...i know this may not have worked out becuase i cant tell you unless i know exactly what he is like, but everyone is different. Kepp that in mind =)
i have been dating this guy for a while and we havent been doing well lately. we love each other but he doesnt seem to make an effort into seeing or talking to me. how do i get him to want to see me and want to be with me?
Well, what you want to do first, is make sure that he knows that you are uncomfertable with the way things are going. Then, if problems get worse, or just continue, you might consider breaking up. But, if you truly dont know...well, what i usually do is sit down, and on a peice of paper, and list all the pros and cons of him, or you alls relationship. ZIf it ends up in a tie, call a friend, but dont tell them what the sccore is, but ask them to name one pros or con. It works, but just focuss on talking to him!!
Hope this works out between you 2, and i hope i was some help!
I live in Florida and my best friends cousin lives in Westvirginia.
We have so much in common and we talk about how much we like eachother.
Me and my parents have already discussed that we were to be moving in the next year or so.
But... I don't know what state they have in mind and if they think of one before I can ask them to move to Westvirginia,Then me and him wont be able to be together!
I've already looked at houses and careers/ jobs for my parents...can't seem to find anything they would like.
I really have feelings for this boy and long distance for me wont go so well.
How do I talk to my parents?...And should I do long distance relationship till we can be together?
help!!! AsAp!!!
Well, if you really like this boy, I dont see why not to have a long distance relationship with him, but as far as talking to your parents about moving... first, you need to know why you are moving, when, and where. then, take them and sit down with them, and then talk to them about your problems. You wont feel better unless you speak up.