I am a level headed 21 year old with lots of wisdom due to watching everyone else in their situations and experiencing a lot of my own. Feel free to ask any questions, If I don't know the answer, I will find a suitable one for you. Best of luck to all.
Gender: Female
Location: Pennsylvania
Occupation: CNA
Age: 21
Member Since: October 5, 2009
Answers: 35
Last Update: January 20, 2010
Visitors: 3113
Main Categories:
Love Life
Friendship
Families
View All
|
| |
19/F
I've always been very picky about who I would want to date and wanted to make sure it was someone I could really have a real relationship with. I never wanted to date just to date and I never dated anyone until January last year. My boyfriend was the first guy I went on a date with, my first kiss, and various other firsts. We've been together a year now and are absolutely perfect for each other. We're already thinking and planning our future life together and I already know that when the time comes for him to pop the question I will say yes.
I'm not asking for advice really but more of a Poll of sorts. How common is it for someone to marry their first boyfriends? Am I just really lucky that I found the right guy on the first try? Also just out of curiosity how many of you think I'm nuts for marrying my first boyfriend? :P
Anyone's thoughts are great. I was just pondering this and thought I'd ask. (link)
| |
I'm also not sure as to how many people marry their first boyfriends, and although its good to have past experiences to learn from, marriage is about both of you having the commitment and drive to make it work because you love eachother that much. nothing else matters as long as you both are sure that even though there will be ups and downs, you will work together and make your relationship work through ups and downs. i work at a nursing home and ive met plenty of people in their 80s and 90s who have been with their spouse for like 65 years and they were their first loves. Your life together depends on how much you put into your relationship. I wish the best of luck to you, and do not think you're crazy. Just make sure before you do that you absolutely know that he is the one you want to wake up next to every morning, the one that will take care of you no matter what, that will wipe your tears when your sad, that will understand when you need your time alone, and that he's as committed as you are. With not having any experience dating I would say that your biggest concern would be in a few years or maybe 10 that you will be curious about what its like to be with someone else..because he's the only one you've ever been with. Hope this helps./
|
Okay so my boyfriend of a year and 7 months just broke up with me. It feels weird and I feel alone...I talked to him and the reason is for distance..."he wants me a lot closer". Is it okay to still hook up with him? We're both in love with one another and I honestly don't want to move on. I think he maybe be the one. Bad idea? I don't know this just seems weird and I'm not feeling right.
(link)
| |
Hooking up is a bad idea. That gives him the illusion of a relationship without actually having to have one with you. If he truely wanted you, and wanted to be closer to you, than he would make the move. I think he's using a rediculous excuse. You aren't going to feel right, you were together for a year and a half. You have to find yourself again to feel right. If you're both in love than he would want to compromise. This doesn't sound like the case. Nobody wants to move on, but we do. We push forward, and find ourselves a litle bit every day. Best of luck to you.
|
|
I broke up with my boyfriend last weekend. We decided that we don't want to hate each other and want to be friends and talk but when would be a good time to talk? I'm over him except that I miss talking to him but I'm 90% sure he still loves me. (link)
|
That's one of those things you have to deal with when you break up with someone. It hurts but you have to give yourself and the guy time to heal before you can talk about being friends. They say it takes half the time you were together to get over eachother. Either take that, or if you really really want to talk to him, just say I miss talking to you, and that's that. You don't want anything more or less than talking. Good luck
|
|
i am usually working a lot so when I am off which is 2 days during the week and every other weekend i stay at my girlfriends house but I went yesterday to go see family for 2 hours and she got upset how can I tell her we need to be able to go see family or other friends without makin her mad? she even got mad because i had to go home before dark once to help my mom with something outside. (link)
| |
She sounds like she always wants to spend all her time with you, and thats not fair. You have your own seperate life, as well as one with her. You can do what made me learn pretty quick with my one boyfriend, which would be to say "I want you, I DON'T need you. I will live without you,even though I won't want to, so if you don't let me go and do things on my own, I will be permanantly on my own." But then you will have to reassure her that you really do want her, its just you need some time for you friends too, and if she is going to keep getting mad about every little thing than she needs to find someone who will have no problem being stuck up her ass 24/7. As for my boyfriend who told me that, we get a long really great now whether its him going to the bar with his friends, going to his moms, or me going somewhere. She needs to have friends too. A lot of girls give up their friends and stuff to be available for their man all the time, every time. She needs to have her own life too. She has no right to get mad at you for wanting to do stuff without her. For christ's sake, if you were ever going to propose to her, you wouldnt be able to do it without her knowing about it with her head shoved so far up your ass like that. If she doesn't give you space to do things, she will end up losing you completely, leading to A LOT more space than she wanted you to have. If you have never done anything to make her mistrust you, then point that out. She needs to trust you to do whatever.
|
|
i'm female, 38 years old. I cannot come to a decsision about leaving my 9 year relationship. we are not married and have no children. he is a heavy drinker and smoker. he will not consider stopping drinking or smoking. he works but i know that i will not have a secure financial future with him. i have a good job and pay a majority of the bills. i love him but cannot decide if financial security is a good enough reason to leave. (link)
| |
Financial security isn't a good enough reason to stay either. What is he providing for you? Because if he really loved you, he would want to stop drinking and smoking or whatever, to be a better person FOR YOU. When you're in a relationship, you do things not for yourself, but for your significant other. Either take a list, divide it by pros and cons..and see which list is longer with the more valuable qualities. You don't sound like you're happy to me, and after 9 years, you should have been married, dont you think? You may love him but he obviously doesn't love you if he's not even willing to meet you half way. I think you would be better on your own.
|
So I'm 16 and a junior in high school.
There's two guys that im "talking" too.
One goes to my school,is a junior and really nice and friendly and funny and whatnot,but he's really nerdy and not that good looking but I like him for his personality ,but i barely find him attractive at all.We get along really well,but he's a virgin and has never really done anything like that,which I have and I'm popular and have a lot of friends and whatnot,so it'd be out of the ordinary for me to go out with him,but I do like him.Then theres this 19 year old,who lives near me and is pretty cute.He as well has a good personality and is really nice ,he's got a good job and ofcourse he's not a virgin so he's more experienced and such,but he doesn't know any of my friends and he's so random but we are still talking and I still like him as well too.
I don't know what to do! I don't like either one of them THAT much,just a little bit ..if even that.
Should I just hangout with them separately a few times and kinda pick from there? Or what?It's nothing serious with either guy. (link)
| |
My advice would be to NEVER, not see someone just because your friends will think he's a nerd. Some of the coolest people Ive met were nerds believe it or not. Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. If you don't find him attractive though, maybe he isn't for you. There does have to be some base of attraction. On the other hand, dating an older guy is more work. They expect more maturity when it comes to situations, some that you may not be able to handle as a 16 year old. They have stresses and worries from jobs and everything else that you wont understand unless you actually have a job. I wouldn't date a guy based on his experience either. Experience in the sexual area is nice, but so is inexperience. That way you can teach him the way YOU like it, and you can be the one teaching him things. Take your time and just see where things go. Good luck
|
|
Hoookay....so I've met this guy online (this was almost a year ago) and we've decided we are going to meet eachother in person for the first time...(We're meeting in a VERY public place, and I'll have someone with me and such) However, I think it's possible that I might really, really like this guy! I know I won't know for sure until I actually meet him, I'm still scared...though he's seen my picture and told me that I'm pretty, I'm still not entirely confident about my looks (Particularly my teeth...) and I'm worried about saying or doing the wrong things, yadda' yadda'...so I guess what I'm asking is for advice from anyone who has met someone online and then in person...thoughts? Suggestions? (link)
| |
Meeting people whether they're online or not when you're insecure about yourself is nerve racking. If you are yourself, and the guy likes you, great. If you don't act like yourself, he will find out your true colors eventually and he will not appreciate not knowing the real you. Just be you, im sure it will be fine.
|
|
hey! I am 17 years old and a female. So I'm issues on being fucked over by guys. It starts out the same. A guy n I are friends, kinda like each other. the guy tells me, and then we kinda have a thing. but after awhile of being in this thing, we start doing stuff.and I know we both want it. But then after awhile he just completely stops talking to me! ): and I know what it is, so I just completely stop talking to him as well! I'm sick of it! I would rather have a relationship and not a thing or "friends with benefits." but also, I'm not jumping into it. i actual start liking the guy, and I think he does too but I'm gettin heartbroken by being fucked over! also, now I'm afraid to even start liking a new guy cuz i dont know if he is gonna do the exact same things the other guys have! ): please any advice? help? (link)
| |
Stop giving them what they want so easily. Honestly, if you're worth it to them, then you're worth waiting for. Sure you have your sexual needs, but when you really want a true relationship, you'll see who really wants one with you if you make them wait.
|
|