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Razhie. Advicenators Member Since: June 13, 2005. Answers: 5077. Visitors: 211514.
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The Question
I'm in a long distant relationship. I met a girl who is also in a long distant relationship. We were honest with each other about our relationship status. I thought she was ready for us to be friends with benefit until she won't let me have sex with her the day she slept in my place, sleeping on the sofa in the lounge and insisting I go sleep in the bedroom. I cut things off of her. She keeps texting asking why I cut off. I told her I find her attractive and want us to be friends with benefit. She says she doesnt want that. And that she doenst find me attractive. I keep cutting her off but she keeps texting me. Came around once, keeps feeling at home, eats my food, even once asked me to buy her groceries. I feel like she's just a gold digger. I cut off again but she keeps asking why I am avoiding her. Is she playing hard to get? Or is she really a gold digger hoping I will keep tolerating her with the hope that I will eventually get some? I am male, working class. She's a student.
The Answer
Dude. She just doesn't want to have sex with you.
She's in a long distance relationship with someone else, and so are you. She clearly likes talking to you, but doesn't want to fuck you. She's not 'playing hard to get'. She's been total honest and direct with you: She doesn't want to have sex. She has said those words, and her actions back it up entirely.
There is basically no way for a woman to be more respectful and clear with you, then to straight up tell you she isn't going to fuck you, and then make sure that the arrangements are not at all confusing for you, and that there will be zero opportunity for fucking.
Don't be an idiot. If you don't want to be her friend anymore, then stand up for yourself and don't be her friend anymore, but don't start insulting her and calling her a gold-digger. It's not her fault you keep thinking with your dick instead of listening to the perfectly reasonable things she is saying. She's a perfectly normal human being who doesn't want to fuck you.
If her only value to you is as someone you maybe one day get to stick your dick into, then end the friendship. She'll be better of without you.
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