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December 15, 2008Answers:
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Hi, I'm Courtney. I want to become a pre-school teacher :] and I've been though a whole heck of a lot, so feel free to ask me anything, i'll do my best to help ! xxo."i refuse to sink."
advice
I have a boyfriend i have been with for a year and he has always been controlling. I am at the point were i cant take him telling me what i can and cannot do. I have told people about him and all of them have said get out now he is going to become abusive. I believe them because there have been times where he gets so angry that he is about to punch me but ends up not doing it. I am so sick of all the pointless pain. I am trying to get out now but he keeps saying i will change i cant live without you. I can't get out someone help. Please :(
I was trapped in a relationship similar to this one.
It started off like this.. he would get so angry and yell. then it escalated to whenever he got mad at me or something, hed punch a wall (putting holes everywhere) or drive SUPER fast in his car to scare me, and he would just scream at me, not stopping. saying hes in control and he'll slow down when he wants to. he would also raise his hand like he was going to hit me or something, and i would yell at him and threaten to leave. after this it escalated to him grabbing my arms so tight it left bruises. Even further than this, he started getting really rough with me and started throwing me around... i wont go into detail, but after all of this, I kept trying to break up with him and he said the same stuff to me like yours is to you.. "i love you, im sorry." "it wont happen ever again, please dont leave me." "ill change for you, i swear, just give me another chance." "i cant live without you, ill die. ill kill myself." and then he would actually call me and tell me he was holding a knife to his wrist and that nobody would believe me if i told them. it was just ... a terrible, terrible experience.
I'm a smart girl, and I'm sure you're a smart girl too, but I wasnt smart, and I stayed with him because i felt trapped and alone and i honestly thought nobody would believe me. but you NEED to get out. even if youre afraid.. you need to let him go and cut him out of your life for good. if he loved you, he wouldnt even raise his fist. lets put it that way. he obviously has anger issues and needs help, but you cant wait for that to happen.
if you end it (which im hoping you do/did) make sure you are in a public setting with lots of people around. make sure people know where you are and maybe even bring a friend or two along just to stand in the background to keep you safe because he sounds like hes starting to become a loose cannon.
you CAN get out, because he does not control you, and you know you deserve better. this is nto a healthy relationship, in the long run you will be so much happier without him. i promise. you can do this. :]
hope i helped, xxo.
(Rating: 5) Thank you so much! I finally got out of the relationship and im alot happier now :)