|
| |
Hi I'm 19/f and my boyfriend is 20/m. We've been going out for 2.5 years now and like every couple, we have our share of arguments.
The problem with my boyfriend is that he's beginning to develop a short fuse. The reason I say develop is because his anger has never been this bad, not until recently. Fortunately, he doesn't get violent, but he does say a lot of mean and hurtful things that he admits that he regrets later.
When I talk to him about it, he sincerely apologizes, and tells me that when he gets angry now, it's hard to control his anger. It's really bothering me that he's like this because it seems like he gets irritable more often over the silliest of things and his hurtful words are taking its toll on me and our relationship.
We've decided long ago to keep our disagreements and conflicts civil to the best of our ability, and it was working for the most part, but now I'm the only one putting in any real effort.
I know he doesn't mean it, and my question is if there is anything I can really do to help him? I'm usually good at giving myself advice on how to handle situations like these, but I feel I've tried everything. I've confronted him about it, when we fight I hardly raise my voice and I tell him to calm down, I've proposed taking breaks, just anything you can really imagine. Some say that I should threaten to leave him or something along those lines, but trust me, it only makes him more angry.
It's like male PMS or something, he gets more irritable than me sometimes!
And no, it's not because he's sexually frustrated. How I know it's not a problem is because we are very honest and open about sex and everything for that matter; our communication and sex life are great.
So really I need advice on if there is anything I can do (that I haven't tried) and if anyone knows where this sudden bad temperment could have come from? Thanks so much! (link)
| |
He has to g to counsling or anything to control his anger the reason is almost all cases of physical abuse begin with verbal abuse.. now he might just say hurtful things now but one day he could hit you now i know you are thinking he would never do that but you have to a counsler with him to get his anger under control.
|
|
Rating: 4
| |
It's not that I'm thinking he'd never physically abuse me, I know he won't. Sorry if I sound ignorant or naive, but the reason why is because if he had ever wanted to hit me, he would have done it already. Trust me, there have been worse situations in the past where he had the opportunity, but he never takes it. These anger patterns have been very consistent throughout the time span that it has been happening (I'd say roughly 4 months) and never in any argument has it gotten worse. Keep in mind he really can't hit me even if he wanted to, the majority of our arguments happen over the phone. It's just like deja vu, everything happens repeatedly through the same process, cuz I mean, nothing is different! He goes through the stages where I can easily predict what he will say next. As much as I try to avoid his little "stages", it still happens, that's what bugs me. But I will consider a counselor, thanks.
|
|
