Gender: Male
Member Since: November 18, 2007
Answers: 170
Last Update: February 13, 2014
Visitors: 12349
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I am part of a group of a few people (most of whom are guys) and I've developed a sort of crush on one of my best friends. Okay, I'm full-out into him. He's not perfect, debonair, bad-boy or anything like that--he's casual and goofy. Anyway, so for a long time, before I began seriously liking him, people used to tease us...you know the whole "you two act like a married couple." joke, etc. Even my friend's mother thought we were dating! So now that i do like him, i'm delusional because of those things. I told my other best guy friend, who is a close friend of the guy i like, and he told me originally that everyone always thought we would end up together. So now i'm even more delusional. What i'm really trying to ask for here is advice: i've talking to him about a girl he likes...he's never been very clear about it, but i don't know what that means. He has told me someone told him her friend likes him. I asked him (since i'm his friend i can easily ask personal questions) if he would date her, and he told me it depended if he liked the girl or not. Oh dear, a lot of babbling. I really just don't know what to do about the current situation. I like him a lot, and I'm very desperate for a female opinion since all I've got so far is male advice. I spend a lot of time with him, and still, people, like my friend's girlfriend, say we're "cute" together, but he doesn't seem to like me in that way. He teases me, makes eye-contact, tells me if he can't make it to meet after school (we walk home together), we sit together on a couch when we hang out, he puts his arm around my shoulder sometimes when we're walking home, he lets only me wear his hat, and he's really very nice to me. All the tell-tale signs right? Or maybe not. Am I reading too much into it? Is it all just mixed signals on my part? I'm confused, frustrated and upset. It's affecting my life in a negative way, and i can't focus. Overall, I'm very shy and insecure about this and myself in general; I've only been in one other relationship which was counter-productive (and that's putting it nicely). I don't think I would ever be able to confess to him, as my guy friends have suggested. I've asked them, "Does he like anyone?" and "Should i just give up?" They honestly don't know; he's not very open about his feelings, apparently. I've told him i like someone; most likely a mistake. I can't tell him who it is, without lying or embarassing myself beyon belief, and even if, for whatever reason, i'm not being delusional, he probably thinks i like someone else now. I've really dug myself into a big, dark hole. What do I do?! I really need a solid answer or i will drive myself insane. (btw 17/f, and if this seemed really fragmented, that just how jumbled my thoughts are now) (link)
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If you two are such good friends, you just need to talk about it. Don't play any games about it or anything. Surely he would rather know to be able to make a choice. The very worst is you would remain as you are now. You shouldn't worry about him not wanting to "ruin" the friendship. Guys are less worried about dating friends than girls are. If nothing else, you will feel so good that he knows how you feel and it's in the open.
You have had time to do all of the flirting and hoping he will make a move. If he was going to ask you out he would have by now. If he is interested he probably doesn't say so because of the friendship. Guys can't read signals. We aren't mindreaders. Even if he has read them, he probably has thought you were playing around. Maybe he has been flirting and hoped you would say something. If you say how you feel, you will know. Maybe just knowing how you feel would be what makes him interested. If this is the guy of your dreams, games are not the way to go. Yes, you won't have to make yourself vulnerable. But you may end up flirting while some other girl is asking him out.
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(sorry if its long)
heyy guys,
well I have a boyfriend who I love SOOOOOO much!!! and he literally means the world to me, and he feels the same way about me, he says were gonna get married and have wonderful children, and that just puts joy in my heart but anyway for some reason these past couple of days he's been acting weird, like he looks pissed at the world, and when I told him what's wrong he goes nothing stressed with school and stuff. and trust me he tells me everything that's wrong, but for some reason when he told about being stressed with school and work, I get upset because I feel like he maybe doesn't have time for a girlfriend, which upsets me very much, all my friends tell me its ok, he just is stressed with this. but honeslty guys (from your opnion) do u think he'll break up with me cause of this? oh yah and he tells me he's gonna visit me (cause I'm sick) and then he tells me I'm coming over and then he says I'm not gonna make it tonight, he pretty much bailed on me 4 days already, and I'm sorry if you guys think im crazy and stuff, but I also feel like he doesn't care for me anymore, but he calls me and says hey baby, I miss and I love you, but I don't know I'm just so confused, what's wrong with him? what's wrong with me? why doesn't he come visit when I'm ill, and I think he makes up excuses, I'm so confused just please help me guys, I really need your opnion, and did you feel like that with your girlfriend? and he says he feels bad and stuff, well I started crying and so did he cause he felt bad, and it made me feel so terrible making me accuse him of not caring for me anymore (well I said to myself not him) but I don't know just so confused!
pleasee helpp
thanksss soooo much!!!! (link)
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Perhaps it is just what he says. But his bailing and distancing himself does sound like he has someone else. When a person seems like they are being distant for days on end, normally it is because they are thinking of someone else. The phone calls seem almost like it is his guilt kicking in and also as a way to cover his tracks. What is he so busy with that he wasn't with before? If he needs to study, he can study at your place. Normally our gut instincts are correct. But it isnt really too normal for a guy to be to busy for a girlfriend. Nobody comes before the girlfriend in most situations. Maybe family, but if it was a family thing, you'd be invited I'd guess.
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Okay so, me and this guy like eachother but we're not going out because we have before but eh doesn't want to go out because well, he's afraid of the "break up trouble" if you catch my drift. Anyway, he basically NEVER talks to me, and we don't hang out like we used too, I think I don't like him anymore but I don't know how to tell him.
Me and his good friend were talking about it and he doesn't know what I should do either but he told me that this guy does like me. The guy that likes me, tells me he really likes me and stuff, but I mean seriously, how can you like someone if you NEVER hang out. Trust me, I try to but all he says are things like "Hey, cool cool, yeaah, sweet, well bye" and thats it. I don't think I like him anymore but I feel so bad. =/. Plus he talks to a lot of other girls all the time, and he has like secret handshakes, sayings ect. with them but he basically ignores me. Anyone have any Ideas how I can? Please helpp. (link)
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It's hard to tell if you want more or less with this guy but the solution is the same. Move on. If he doesn't want you then you are free to do what you want anyhow. If he does, he has to step up or lose you. Either way it is the answer. You'd be surprised how many guys will want a relationship if they know they will lose a girl otherwise. Fear is an incredible motivator.
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I'm a guy, I always feel these girls like me, but then I find out they have boyfriends and whenever im around them they seem to respond well to me but when there with there boyfriends I kind of ignore them and they seem to ignore me. And when I get to know a girl pretty well and we both want to hook up and stuff she suddenly gets a boyfriend, does that mean she no longer wants to hook up? but ok, the real question is how do I actually know if there attracted to me and I should put the effort of trying to get with them as opposed to just forgetting about it and moving on?? (link)
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You just need a slightly different approach. If you are attracted to someone, find out right away if they are seeing anybody. That way you know. Second, if you find them attractive, let them know very early you feel that way. That keeps things from falling into the friend zone. If a single girl knows you are attracted to her, she will either be happy you are and hope to keep you that way or she will be not interested and will want distance things. You don't have to go overboard with the compliments to let them know you think so. Just saying something like "you're a very attractive girl, your boyfriend is a lucky guy" will kill 2 birds with one stone. If she says "oh i dont have a bf" well why do u think she want's you to know she's single?
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16/f.
I met a guy online (very stupid idea, I know.) and well...we started talking on MSN (he's 18) for a couple of months. and then he starts telling me he cares for me. then in a week, he loves me and he has a major crush on me.
I'm like...wait wait...hold up..WHAT? You don't even know me..!
My question is....is it possible to actually feel love online?
He keeps on insisting it and I don't know if he's bullshitting me.
Advice? (link)
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It's impossible to know whether or not he means that he loves you or if he is only saying it. I do think person can love people he/she knows online. I have friends that I only know online that I care very deeply for and I'd call that love. I would even say that people can fall in love online. If someone can fall in love at first sight, they can surely fall in love online.
Let's look at it this way. How many dates do a couple need before they may feel love? Now think of how many hours there would be put in on those dates. You have couples that think they are in love within two weeks of dating. Let's say that's 6 dates at 5 hours each which totals 30 hours. It's not hard to log 30 hours with someone online in a few months. Also, if you are chatting, it's not like going to a movie or dinner where much of the time is dedicated to not talking.
The guy may feel he has a deeper understanding of what's in your mind and heart. If he is sincere, I would speculate that maybe the guy is a bit new to chatting or girls. Maybe he just hasn't felt this close before.
I do agree with others that if you are uncomfortable to be cautious. Maybe you should distance yourself as well. But the guy may mean everything he says and may be telling the truth.
I do think part of this is because of the difference in men and women. Young guys often develop feelings for girls without actually dating the girl. The guy has a class with a girl, he falls for her and after longing he finally confesses his love only to scare the daylights out of the girl. Sound familiar? lol
First off, be safe. If you feel safe and okay about everything and like his company but dont want his advances, be nice if you can. You can give him the ultimatum of frienship only or no more contact. If need be, you can spend less and less time talking to him and eventually just go away.
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Noone helped me with my question so I will ask again. My face gets super red whenever I see the guy I like. Is there a way to prevent this from happening? (link)
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You shouldn't worry about your face changing like it does. When a person is attracted to someone their tone will change and their pupils will change as well. These things actually make us appear more attractive to people around us. Women use blush to have that rosey glow to attract people. Your body is just naturally doing so. The very worst is the guy may figure out you like him. Guys are thick to begin with so any hint they get is actually a good thing.
What would probably help it most would be to actually talk to him. The more you talk to him the less nervous you would be. For starters just go with "hello" and a smile and work your way up to commenting on his shirt/watch/necklace or whatever. If you talk to him, you will take away some of the mystery and you will become more at ease.
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what's so wrong with washing straberries after they're cut? my family studies teacher screamed when she saw someone doing that! i was pretty scared, but didn't see much of a big deal of what it can do to the strawberries. (link)
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I have to think this is related to spreading E coli. When working with beef, steak doesn't need cooked as long to kill bacteria as ground beef because when the outside of the meat is mixed with the inside, bacteria can be found inside. I have to think it is the same with the strawberries. The knife may spread things to the inside of the strawberries if not cleaned and on top of it, once it is inside it is probably harder to kill it all. I'm glad you posted this question because I never stop to think about such things.
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What are some different ways to eat white rice? I've tried it with vinegar, but I'm wondering other ways. I eat it often but I get tired of eating it by itself or with soy sauce. I'm just curious as to how I can spice it up and make it more flavorful. (link)
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Two of the simplest things someone can do is to make rice with either red or black beans. AKA Red beans and Rice; and Moors and Christians respectively. You could get some frozen asian vegetables at most grocery stores and combine them with your rice. It will give you some variety and it's very simple.
If you were willing to get a bit more adventureous, i'd suggest jambalaya, spanish rice, shrimp creole served over rice is wonderful.
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Ok my and my ex broke up 3 days ago. We talk on the phone and she said i have lost my chances at ever going out with her. She read me her personal journal it made me realise some of the anoying shit i did im not a man, im a kid. She is 6 months older then me. And shes in grade 10 and im in grade 9. I have never felt this way about anothere girl. She flirts with othere guys infront of me. Its killing me inside, and when I tell her that she thinks im purpesley making her feal like shit. How can I talk to her with and act around her that will make her want me back? I know I cant change the way she feels about me. But I might be able to change the way she thinks about me. What are good topics to talk about well im on the phone with her? Something sweet, something that makes me sound like im 15 cause im relly mature she just doesnt see that. She wants somone who is fun but can be serouis. She wants a man. Help me, I cant let her go. How can I change the way I act and the way I talk to her that would make her like me as a lover and not just a freind? If you want to get an idea of how I feel about her listen to the song (broken by: seather) help me please:( (link)
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I feel for what you are going through. Breakups are never easy and emotions stay on long after a breakup. I do see several things you should change though if you possibly can. She obviously is trying to hurt you by flirting with other guys in front of you. You really shouldn't let her know it bothers you. She is doin't it because it hurts you, not because she is unaware of it hurting you. Don't play into her hand.
You want to be more than a friend but you let her remain a friend. You really shouldn't allow her to talk to you whenever she wants. Basically why should she buy the cow when she gets the milk for free? If she calls, tell her you are busy or that you are going out. It may create jealousy but even if it does not, it doesn't let her get her way and you get to have dignity. Frankly, I'd suggest talking to other girls. Maybe go out with a few, or maybe just ask them out in front of the ex. Two can play at her game. The weaker you appear the less respect she will have for you and right now she is only taking advantage of you. Sometimes with relationships you want to do the exact opposite of your instincts. Instincts make you want to pull somebody closer but when you try you will push them away. Get some distance from her. If you are worth missing to her, she will miss you. Say "hi" and act like everything is fine and just be too busy for her. Girls want a challenge and right now she has to feel that if she ever wants you back, you will take her in an instant. Until that day comes, she is going to play the field and have her fun. You don't want to be cold to her because she may let herself hate you. Be your same nice self but with better things and opportunities. If you happen to get a date while you wait, i'd say to go to the ex and thank her for breaking up with you, otherwise you wouldn't have met this new girl.
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