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leeannostroff@gmail.comGender:
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OhioOccupation:
Bachelors in music, music instructorAge:
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foxychick6798Member Since:
October 17, 2005Answers:
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Hi my name is Lee Ann. I am 29 years old and Graduated from Bethany college obtaining a bachelors of music. I am a happily married woman with two kids, ages3 and 2. I currently have six books out on the market, all of which can be found on amazon. The first is called The Leaf: One fallen heart and a burning desire, my second is called Avengement of Glory, my third is called Spiral of Enlightenment, fourth one is called Prodigy of the Immortal, fifth one is called Augment in the Realm of Darkness, and my sixth novel is called Bond in the Spiritual Heart. I started this advice column to see if I could give good advice. Turns out I am pretty good, better than I thought actually. I enjoy seeing people smile when I give them good advice and they use it. It makes me feel better as a person to help people. I want to make the world a better place and I think that starting an advice column is the right way to begin. Writing is a huge part of my life, without it, I wouldn't be able to function properly. After seven years, I think I have done pretty well as an advice columnist.
advice
My period is never the same, but this time it's WAY different. it was lighter than normal and only lasted a couple days.then it started again three days later. I am a virgin, so being pregnant is out if the question. Why is this happening??
My mom had the same thing, she had to see a doctor and they prescribed her some medication to regulate her period again. Seeing a doctor is your only option unfortunately and if not dealt with immediately, it could grow into more serious problems.
I'm 14. I'm supposed to be having the time of my life at school, but my life is anything but fun. I've never had a best friend.. and I'm far from popular. I used to be friends with a gang of girls but when I got close with one of them all of them were really mean to me and started ignoring me. They're the popular ones now. So I kinda became friends with these other bunch of girls but they ditch me all the time and I can tell they don't really care. I just started a new year of school, and I've been nice to everyone I know. And the popular girls talk with me like friends but they just start planning on hanging out even when I'm around but don't invite me. And today I was standing with the only girls who talk with me and the popular girls just called all of them and invited them to go to a movie in front of me but left me out. Like, WTF?! What did I do to make them go out of the way to make me cry? 'Cause I cry everyday and I have NO FRIENDS. Should I just die?
Suicide is not the way to go. Instead of following the people at school and trying to befriend anyone you can, why not start your own image? Look through your closet, match up a new outfit or buy a new one, get a hair cut, and do a makeover. The key to getting girls like that to like you is how you act. If you act like you don't need them, they will come to you. Instead of befriending the girls, you should be trying to befriend the boys. Getting the boys helps get the besties faster. It's not you at all, its how you are presenting it. Girls prey on girls they can make cry and feel like they are worthless, but if you present yourself as this confident, carefree girl, they will respect you. And in turn, want you to join their group.
I don't know if you can get this, but sure I can help more just send me an inbox message.
So...I was wondering.....well I'm 15 years old...and I have never had a boyfriend...to tel the truth I am waiting for the right one...but I always still want a boyfriend...thee problem with me though is that I am overweight....no lie....but I like myself...but why are men so attracted to woman who are really skinny or not plus size? Why am I so different? And why can't I find that right one yet?
They are going through the change and they can't control their hormones. When you get older it becomes alot easier. Finding the right means you have to date alot of wrong ones before finding the right one. Why not search for someone not in your class but a bit older and in a different area. It is hard to date anyone you know, but going on an adventure and searching.
Does andrew like me
It depends, does he talk to you alot, smile at you, can't go a day without either seeing or talking to you, does he flirt...if he shows these signs then yes.
Ok...so my mom is pissed...well she has been pissed since one day this week I got up at like 1 in the afternoon...I'm on sprin break though.....and now she is gtting mad me for whateveri do....I got a haircut and she is like "you made me spend money on that!? Why didn't you cut it shorter!?" And stuff like that...its like whatever I do she is getting mad at me and I don't know what to do...obviously I can't talk back or tell her what I fee because she will just take it all wrong...and so I don't say anything...its very depressing having her scream and get mad me...to the point where I just wanna cut myself everytime because I feel likes its my fault...this has happened before, when I was in 6th grade....so I just don't know what to do! Any suggestions that can help me out?
It all depends on how old your mother is, but there are some rare cases when women go through menopause earlier. If this is the case, it is not your fault at all because she can't control her hormones. My mother was exactly like that a couple of years ago. The best thing you can do is just remember that she can't control it. A good way to look at is, shes acting like shes pregnant. Take in the anger and then release it in a positive way by doing something you love such as music, writing in a journal, learning an instrument, getting a punching bag, etc
Those who wrote about not killing themselves have never faced financial ruin caused by economics.
Money is the breath and soul of life. Those who do not discuss money are hiding it.
Wouldn't you kill yourself if you lost everything as I have? I will find a painless way to kill myself,,, I will.
I have two stories that correlate with that. I have my best friend who was staying over at my house while her parents were arguing over money and world itself. They got so tired of the argument, her father shot her mother then shot himself. I have a best friend who is absolutely devastated that they felt the need to something so drastic as this. By dying they ruined more than one life. I think that if you killed yourself, you would cause more problems than solutions.
The second story has to do with a co-worker of mine. She let her 2 year old son stay with her father before the bank decided to take his house. He has lost everything, house, children, wife, etc. He was so selfish to think that he couldn't survive in this world with nothing that he shot his 2 year old son in the arm to wake him up and then shot him in the head. He decided to set his house on fire, and finally killed himself.
I believe that the economy is really bad and I get why people do what they do. No matter what age you are, theres always a solution. There online jobs, theres telemarketing if your desperate, etc. I don't even know if you are a religious person or not, but I believe this is a test, and you are giving up because you feel that dying is the way out. I am afraid that our death's are the least of our problems.
(I am fifteen, girl, sophomore. He is seventeen, boy, junior). So me and my ex have been broken up for about nine ish months? We dated for eight and had a reeeeally messy break up. While we were dating he, yes, had me pretty whipped. It's something I'm really not proud of. But he took advantage of that in a lot of ways and really hurt me... To sum it up he pressured/guilted me into physcial stuff, dumped me in a text, and told me he only stayed with me for so long cause he liked hooking up and he never actually liked me. Yet yeah, he had me whipped cause he reallly had me fooled that he loved me. He would actually force me to look him in the eye while he said he loved me... Didn't really think someone could lie to my face like that but ugh that's another story. Point is, I found out after we broke up that'd he'd talk a bunch of shit to his friends/baseball team. Just really disrespectful stuff you shouldn't be saying about your girlfriend. Anyway. Even though we’ve been broken up he will still mess with me. I’m pretty sure he gets enjoyment out of it. He'll just rip on me cause he knows I used to take it and he thinks I still will. Which okay... truth time: I'm not a very assertive person, he knows that, I don't know I'm just... a doormat. Or I used to be. For example, last week:
Him: Put some clothes on you look like a whore.
Me: You’re a dick.
Him: You love my dick.
Me: (quietly) Stop.
Him: Make me.
Me: Come on.
Him: You know what?
Him: I think I still have you whipped. I’m pretty sure I could get you do anything.
Me: You’re an idiot.
Him: If I dropped my pants right now would you suck me off?
Me: (attempted to push him away, he stopped me)
Him: I’m not gonna lie sweetie, you’re a tiny little thing. That’s probably not a good idea.
Me: Just let me go.
Him: I can’t take you seriously. You’re just so cute when you’re mad.
This is where he tries to pinch my cheek and I smack his hand away but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me up to him.
Me: Let go.
Him: (Laughing)
Me: Seriously, stop.
Him: Okay, okay. But remember, as much as you deny it you know you’re still mine.
UHM CREEPY?? Like I don’t even know what that means and I’m just so pissed off at him right now, like I honestly don’t even know what to do!! He’s basically dating this other girl so what the heck does he think he’s doing…? I want to talk to him but every time we talk he just has this way where as you can see from above, I can never find it in me to just REALLY tell him off. Sometimes I think he’s right. He gives me all this shit and I can never just yell at him. And it really takes a toll on me… I don’t want to talk to the school and I don’t want to get anyone else involved because I feel like I’m never gonna solve this problem until I can handle him myself. I need to do this for me. That last line has been in my head 24/7 for the past few days because I think he’s right. I need to talk to him and tell him I’m not his toy anymore but I’m scared I’m not gonna have the guts. Please help me… Tips, things to say? Anything.
He seems to think he has control over you because you have no one to defend your honor. He thinks that he can still bother you as long as your still single. Males find themselves thinking they are superior over women and he is one of them. I understand that standing up for yourself is a lot harder than you think. Hes saying your in his control until you say otherwise. Either by getting a boyfriend who won't put up with that, getting a restraining order, suing him for both sexual, verbal, and physical abuse, etc. If you have to go to extremes say something like, "oh my the only reason I stayed with you was because I was waiting for the next best thing and I got it when you dumped me" or if he says that you still want him say something like "whatever helps you sleep at night". If he grabs you say either "quit abusing me" or "let go of me or i will sue your butt for assault". I realize your point for wanting to do this on your own, but sometimes looking towards others is the best scenario.
so yesterday i was talking to him and he told me that i was annoying for texting him and he asked me to stop and he said please with it.
so i just guess i should give up, like i shouldnt even think it could happen? like at this stage i should move on and be done with it?
im sorry, its just i dont know what to do.
Yeah, I said keep doing it until he firmly tells you he doesn't want to talk anymore. Hes not the friend for you or anything more for that matter. To be honest he is a jerk and you can do better.
he said that he accepted my apology now. and i texted him the other day just to talk like casually but he didnt answer again.
like i know you are trying to be positive and so am i but at this point should i just leave it? ask him questions? or keep trying to talk to him? i mean i still have faith cause i dont think he is interested in another girl. and he has shown me that he is testing me. i know the way he is acting and what he is doing but i dont know if thats enough.
and again im sorry for asking so many questions. i appreciate all the help you are giving me. you dont understand how much it means to me.
Sometimes people mean to answer back but get distracted and forget about. I wouldn't read to much into him not answering back. It will happen more than once.
im sorry that i keep coming back to you with questions but you are the only one who is honest and to the point. and you definitely know what you are talking about.
so he texted me and said he accepted my apology and my friends just said to say thank you, i wish i could of said more but they said that i shouldnt strike up a conversation cause that would seem desperate?
and also i just dont know what to do now? like ive earned his trust and if he truly never wanted to talk to me again he woulda said so already. should i leave him alone for a few more weeks? he is in volleyball season and i dont want to bother him.
You don't want to lose contact by not talking for a few weeks but you also don't want to do it consistently. I would text every couple of days, it shos that you still care and you are willing to give him space at the same time. Your friends are sort of right. Striking up a conversation right after might indicate you don't think about what you did wrong, but giving a day of space will show that I know what I did was wrong and I am willing to prove that I am truly sorry.
I don't know what to do with him! I found out from my bff that my bf made a facebook group thing about our relationshp. I went and red a few things on it and it is personal and nothing anybody should know but us so I told him I knew he had a secret he was keeping from me but not what it was so he would tell me or something but he didn't. i kinda thought that he posted stuff and didn't think it was bad and I wanted to give him chances to say so but he just said he didnt have no secrets so i went back to read the rest and he had made it private only so now it is hidden from me.
I guess what I am asking is if he didn't think this was wrong why did he hide it when i found out? He still denies everything and now i got no proof because i cant see it anymore!!! i have been crying about this and i feel betrayed like he has a secret life on facebook or something! should i stay with him if he isn't going to be honest and still hides things?
Sorry if this is too long!
Well, a good detective can make a secret identity, he seems a like he would be an oblivious guy so make a new facebook with a different email even if it is using your parents or something. get a couple of friends to add you in the process, then add him again. You will be able to read everything again. He obviously isn't a faithful person for displaying his relationship like that, if you do do it, your suppose to just list the good. You don't want an honest guy, your right if it was a good guy, he would have come clean and told you everything from the start or at least wouldn't have denied it whne you asked about it.
I signed up for college and start my classes this week but I have a big problem. I applied and got a big student loan to carry me through this year of college or whatever and I just don't know about being able to repay it later. They want me to repay it 2 years after I graduate and I'm like I don't think that might happen because of the economy and how hard it is to find a job. I'm going to be like a teacher maybe but I'm just starting out with basic classes. What happens if I can't repay the college loans anyways though?
You can extend the due year of the loans after you graduate and if you attend a bigger college, they will continue to increase on that same payment thing. You can make arrangements on how much you want to pay on your students loans too. It can all be worked out. I am going to a 40000 school a year and they are working with me.
sorry that im asking a question and im sure you are so busy and im sorry for this.
i just dont know what to do. like i dont know if what im doing will help anything or if he even wants to talk to me or not? like will he seriously just tell me he doesnt wanna talk to me again? or is he showing it through his actions. cause he even said he didnt know if us talking was good or bad either. will he ever talk to me like normal or will it always be this hard?
but i will definitely pray for your mom. sorry if you think thats weird. its just my family is religious and i hope it gets better.
Well, I think my previous answers will pretty much answer these questions, because you asked the same ones before. At least I am pretty sure you did. Thanks and cancer doesn't usually get better, but thanks for the thought.
Hi there,
The user asking these questions:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=585414
... you know the one, is getting obsessive to the point that the other users she is doing this to kinda want her to be issued a warning ban.
Being that you are the one who has fielded the most of her questions, I thought I would ask you if you thought it was time for a wake-up call.
Denial doesn't typically get better if it hasn't gotten better over the course of months. ;-)
I ask, because I am afraid she will run you off the site from sheer annoyance. We would hate to lose you here.
Thank you,
DN.
P.S. If you were waiting for what I was waiting for, namely a guy to answer and tell her the direct truth about this, wait no more:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=585402
... and the feedback: "i agree with you but then i dont. and yes you are a guy but idk."
Do what you think is the best course of action, but I am not bothered by it at all. My patience and tolerance is high.
so ive been trying to talk to him so more and its kind of going good. i apologized for insulting him cause i really didnt mean it.
but then i texted him on saturday and he didnt answer. i know this is only the second time he hasnt answered but i just dont know if im wasting my time or if this is a lost cause or if im doing something wrong? i know i need to have patience with him and i want this to happen i just dont know how to approach it again.
sorry i havent written back but my mom found out she has breast cancer. just keep trying, he may not have answered beacause he is busy and eventually forgot. i do it all the time lol.
so then i just keep talking to him, like normal?
yes
so i apologized and he said okay thanks and then i just said i hope you can forgive me and i hope its fine we are talking and he said i guess and i was like idk if thats good or bad and he said idk either.
so then i just restated that i was sorry and that i made a mistake and he said iknow you did. but you still did it. and then he said he had to go.
im not sure if he will ever forgive me or what i can do to change this whole mess? is this him playing hard to get cause he is acting really tough?
I firmly believe he is acting tough and mean to see if you are tempted to do the same thing again. Once he sees that you are willing to make amends and will not do it again, he will loosen up. This is something that is going to take some time.
so yesterday we were talking and everything was fine. but then he asked why i was texting him and i said cause i wanted to talk.
and he was like idk since you insulted me.
the month after he broke up with me he was being a jerk about everything so i made some small comments that werent appropiate and in which i regret completely because i only said them out of anger.
so i asked him if he hated me and he said idk but i have no reason to believe he hates me cause they werent that bad of comments. but then i asked if he was mad at me and he said alittle. i asked him if he could just tell me but he didnt answer and thats how the conversation was left. i apologized for what i did because i truly didnt mean it.
im just wondering how i can get over it and try to get him to forgive me. like i know he saw me at my worst and i regret it but i also believe in second chances and i want to tell him that but i dont want to freak him out.
and since he didnt answer that last text, what do i do? like should i give it a few days and ask again?
im sorry. i just dont know what to do. it was a rough month for me and i took it out on him. he cant blame me for that.
If you were having a rough month, tell him about it. If he is the understanding person you are trying to make him out to be, he will listen. You need to tell him that you are sorry that you offended him and you will do whatever it takes to make sure it doesn't happen again. If he wasn't truly going to forgive, he wouldn't have even bothered with responding to you. Once he starts talking again, and you guys go back to the usual conversations, you will forgive and forget. Also, a red flag on apologizing and not knowing the reason. Guys tend to get agrivated when you apologize and don't know the reason. If he asks why are you apologizing, say for offending you that day. You were being slightly mean and I said the wrong things in response. I am truly sorry and did not intend on offending. Will please accept my apology?
so i texted him again & he didnt answer. i dont want to give up on this but i dont want him to think im being annoying or pushy?
do i still try and text him or is he trying to send me a message?
I have said this alot, he may be busy. Sometimes I don't text all my friends and I forget to. Still talk to him, I mean he can't answer everyone. Talking isn't being pushy, talking about your past, feelings, and expectations of the relationship etc is pushy.
20F.
Hey! I love your advice and I'm hoping you can help me :) this will probably be long but I WILL definitely return the favor!
So a few weeks ago I hooked up with this guy brad while we were both kinda drinking. We know each other, but we're not really friends. We have mutual friends and we just made out and he fingered me, no big deal, whatever. Well the first time i texted him, before the hookup ..he was drinking and so he forgot to save my number so he does NOT have it. Anyway while we were hooking up he told me "oh my gosh your sooo hot, and your body ..aaaah so hot." something along those lines ;) so I know he's attracted to me and I am a very pretty girl (do not want to sound conceited)
Well now tonight I was with one of my good friends and she has brads number. I find out before I'm gonna go home that she had been texting brad all night about ME. and the whole thing was a lie about what she said to him, I have NO idea why she made it all up?? But thats not what i'm asking ha..
This is the convo:
MY FRIEND: whats up
BRAD: partying, you?
FRIEND:oh just trying to find where candis'(me)drunk ass is partying at haha but when are we going to party again like we did that one night you hooked up with candis.
BRAD: well i'm having a party now, come.
FRIEND: well i don't go to partys alone haha but is there anyone i would know thats there?
BRAD: bring my girl candis.
FRIEND: i can't get ahold of her, try texting her and see where she is (she gave him my number)but i know she is having people at her house next week/weekend because her parents will be gone you have to come
BRAD: ohhhh haha okay i'm not texting her.
FRIEND: why not please she won't respond to me and i'm worried about her and so maybe she will respond to you
BRAD: haha i don't have her number
FRIEND: i just gave it to you, (gives him my number again)
BRAD: i'm not texting her
FRIEND: fine brad don't help me out then!
BRAD: call her.
FRIEND: haha omg nevermind she just sent me a funny drunk text and picture
BRAD: haha nice
FRIEND: (sends this pic of me that she took from a different night, different party, while I was wearing this sexy outfit dirty dancing with another girl)look how hot she looks in that outfit i'm so jealous!!
BRAD: wow
FRIEND: shes so innocent but so crazy and everyone loves her and wants her i'm so jealous but i'm sure you don't wanna hear this i'm going to bed have fun!
BRAD: bye
i'm confused about this whole conversation. I felt good when he said bring my girl candis because it showed he wanted me to be there but then when my friend tells him to text me he didn't want to? I don't know if it was because he was nervous to text me, like i'm intimidating or because i was "supposively drunk" or he just didn't want to talk to me? Or because he was at a party drinking? And then when she sent that pic of me to him and he said "wow" I don't know if that was a good or a bad thing that he said wow. I just don't know what to do..does he seem interested in me? It threw me off that he didn't want to text me? But then the other things he said made me feel like he did want to see me.
What should I do?!
I think he had slight confusion about who you were due to being a little drunk. To be honest, you can't really rely on a conversation between two people late at night while they are partying. When he said wow, he meant that as a compliment like I am jealous I am not there at that party.
Another possibility is maybe he is intimidated by the fact you were "supposedly" partying and hanging around alot of hot men. Why go after a girl that is a hot commodity. He might have felt threatened by that fact. Really you need to gather more evidence to be sure which situation is the best one.
If this were a conversation during the day where they are completely sober, I would say he is the type of guy who does the hit it and quit it method. Where the guy is afraid and dislikes commitments, but just sleeps with a girl and dumps her after doing it. You should find out if he kept the picture on his phone, it shows that he has alot of interest, and likes what he sees.