Hello, call me Abby =] I'm eighteen and a senior in high school this year. I've always had great advice, I'm just not so great at following it =P Feel free to ask me anything, I'll do my best to give you an answer.
Gender: Female
Age: 18
Member Since: February 10, 2007
Answers: 962
Last Update: May 3, 2012
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16/f
so i was in a huge rush to get home, because i was already stressed enough.. so on my way home, i accidentally turned on the wrong street. and so i was planning to do a U-turn, so i was sitting waiting for about 10 minutes because it was traffic time, and the cars behind me were building up. and when i thought that there were no cars, i finally did a U-turn, and all the sudden a car behind me honked, so i hurried and got in the other lane before we got into an accident. so it was a red light, and cars started piling up again, and i was sitting waiting for a green light... then my friend went up to me and said "you almost hit my mom..." and i said "that was your mom?! ohhh sorry!" and he goes "yeah, but i still have to get your license" so he went to the front of my car and wrote down the number. after i got home, i called him and told him to tell his mom that i was sorry, but i didn't hit her car.. because i didn't know why she wanted my license plate number if i didn't. and he said "yeah, you didn't really hit her car, you just sorta hit the bumper but there isn't a scratch or anything on it." so i was just wondering, are they able to report me for "hitting" their bumper with no scratch on it?
and it kind of gets me confused, because they were from behind, so doesn't that mean that she hit me? O_o (link)
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If the car was behind you, I really don't see how you could have hit them. If your friend originally said "almost" and then it changed to "scratched the bumper" it may be the case of them trying to get money out of you. I suggest you get your parents or insurance agent to call them to intimidate them from trying to fool you. Offer to inspect the damage and visit their house to see the car (may be better if you drive by unannounced). Some people are so horrible they dent their cars and blame it on someone else. Don't let that happen. Be saavy, if they go forward with a claim then simply say that you agree completely about submitting a claim because you were hit by them and thats how they damaged their own car.
If there isn't any damage then there really isn't anyone they can report you to. If you hit her, you would have felt it even from inside your car.
I don't expect them to report you if there isn't any damage.
I know how hard it is being a new driver and all I can advise you is to be safe. Next time try to avoid the u-turn and go further down the street, turn into a shop/driveway and turn around from there.
Good luck,
-Abby
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i love my boyfriend to death n weve ben together over a year but he has let himself go n he doesnt care at all about what he looks like.. he refuses n its gross but i love him, how can i get him to workout some or take care of his heigene? (link)
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If you talking to him won't get him to get it together, you could try making him jealous. Pay attention to another guy or mention how hot some other guy is or how much you love a six pack, etc.
Or you could ask him to do things with you like go for a run, go swimming, join a gym.
You can try to change him but just remember all the important things you love about him.
Good luck,
-Abby
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i keep dreamin about pot. smokeing it, dealing it n the side effects. im tryin my hardest to refrain but its soo hard i wana yet i dont wana. what can i do to convince myself i dont want it? (link)
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Why don't you find a goal that can only happen if your clean? A lot of jobs do drug tests, as well as some programs. Find something you can devote time to and be passionate about that will make you have a good reason not to some pot.
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how can i do this?
should i join a gym? and what excersizes do i do? i know "run" but how long?? like an hour on a treadmill?
and im changing my diet to be strict and healthy--fruits-veggies ect.
i want to lose 5 pounds a week
dont tell me its impossible i know its NOT
what other excersizes should i do and for how long?
thanks!
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A gym is a good resource but you can do it on your own if you want. At the gym you can usually talk to employees who can help you choose the best workouts.
Reccomended cardio workouts for adults is 30 mins at least 3 times a week. Thats running, dancing, jumping, biking, anything to get your heart rate up. An hour on the treadmill is a lot of time to devote to it when you first start, so I suggest doing 30 mins each day.
If you want to lose 5 lbs in a week, you can easily lose that much in water weight. Cut out salt (makes you bloat) and sugar.
Add some weight training (increases metabolism). You can go to the gym or buy resistance bands/dumb bells. http://exercise.about.com/cs/exerciseworkouts/l/bltotalworkout.htm
Mix it up and do some different work outs each day. Try a yoga video or a pilates video. Have comcast? They have free workouts on demand. http://www.anmolmehta.com/blog/2008/02/28/free-yoga-videos/#
Diet is super important, but don't start too quickly. Going "cold turkey" is hard, so go slow and you can make a life style change instead of a temporary weight loss.
5 pounds in a week is unrealistic but you can try for it, but you might find that after you aren't trying so hard to lose that five lbs each week you lose weight slower or even gain some back. All I'm saying is take the time to get into a good routine and you will really excell.
Good luck,
-Abby
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I have a 5 year-old daughter studying ballet and dreaming of going pro, her brother is 2.5 years old and she wants him to learn ballet. I also want him to learn, but have a husband that thinks it's gay... Any advice on any side? (link)
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Your son might get teased for it by some people, but think of it this way. If there were no boys in ballet you couldn't have the nutcracker or any beautiful dances that involve romance or male parts. They are needed just as much as female dancers are. Because your son is so young I don't think you need to worry about that right now, the classes that they have for young kids are pretty basic (some tap, some ballet). When I was younger there was a boy or two in classes and for parts in performances they always had more of an oppurtunity to shine since there aren't so many males. See if your son likes it, and tell your husband that this could just be a starting point for if he wants to do other types of dance (aka less 'girly' dancing) someday like hip hop or modern.
And another great point, this is something he can do now. Sports at this age are difficult because they need to develop their motor skills and hand eye coordination. The physical activity and exposure to music and new dance would be beneficial to him in my opinion.
Good luck,
-Abby
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Hey! I'm almost 17 and i just got my learners permit (a little late) in the state of NY. I live on the boarder of NY and CT and my family always drives to CT for everything (taking the backroads into CT without taking any major highways or parkways)
My mom and I were researching wether im allowed to drive in CT or not. I searched on Google and it was like someone from MA asking if they can drive in CT, not what im looking for haha!
Do any of you know wether its legal if i drive in CT or not?
Thank youuu (link)
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Learner's permit drivers are not allowed to drive out of state, I know a handful of people who tried it and got caught and got into a lot of trouble.
Good luck with driving and be safe,
-Abby
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I'm trying my hand at theater/acting. I'm getting an agent. Would getting my belly button pierced hurt my chances of making it in the acting business? (link)
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Probably not. Many actresses have their belly button pierced like Keira Knightly. No one is really going to see it and if for some reason your doing scenes where it would be exposed, some directors would want it in and some would just say take it out and problem solved. However, I don't think you would ever be discriminated against for a part for not having your belly button pierced.
Good luck,
-Abby
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hi
i do often masterbute.since i was 14 and now i am 22 .i.e for six years.so tell me what are the effects of mastu. and how can i avoid it.
my second queston is how can i know if a girl is virgin or not. the first time i do sex with a virgin how should i do it ,should i directly enter my penis or are there other methods (link)
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There aren't any side effects of masturbation, besides mood changes. You may be more familiar in bed with another person because you know your own self better.
And you can't for sure know if a girl is a virgin. A hymen might be present, but hymens can be broken other ways besides sex in a girl's life, and some are even born without it. If it's the first time for her, I suggest being gentle and slow. There are different positions, but its basically a penis going into a vagina, only one hole it can go into (unless your attempting anal sex)
Good luck,
-Abby
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My best friend and I were talking yesterday about racism and we got on the subject of President Obama being a black man. We both heard people saying things like, "I'm not afraid to vote for a black man," and, "I'm voting for Obama because I'm not racist!" A lot of people we came in contact with seemed to not care what Obama was about but focused more on what color he was. Well, we both got to thinking and...isn't it racist to vote for a black guy just because he is black? Isn't that like NOT voting for a black man because he's black? It sounds pretty much like the same sort of racism, right? I don't know maybe we're over-thinking this sort of thing. What do you think? (link)
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Voting for a black man because he is black is racist, against any other race that is running. People think the word racist and they assume its all about black people, but it is discrimination against any race. The person you give your important vote to should be someone qualified and capable of running a country, and the color of your skin does not determine that.
-Abby
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I'm a college student, and have gotten close to one of my professors. I go to a small school where such things are encouraged, and there is nothing overtly “fishy” going on--I'm never going to take a class with this professor again, and there's nothing romantic or sexual going on. However, our relationship/friendship/whatever seems to cause me a certain degree of turmoil.
I don't have any family in the area, so I stayed with her family over spring break. I also nannied for her children over the summer and occasionally went with her family on weekend vacations. Now I occasionally go to her house for dinner or babysit her kids.
The problem is that I feel this professor’s affections are very fickle. Sometimes she’ll call or email and be really interested and engaging. Other times I’ll stop by her office or send her an email and she is disinterested or even mean. Because we aren’t really equals, I don’t feel comfortable bringing this up with her; plus there isn’t really a way I can reciprocate (I can’t, for example, invite her to my tiny dorm room for dinner).
I wonder sometimes why she is interacting with me at all, but I don’t feel comfortable asking her (frankly, I don’t think she’d give me a straight answer). Is she using me for my babysitting skills? Am I pumping up her ego or fulfilling her “good deeds” quota?
So. Is this okay? Is there a tactful way to address my concerns? I'd appreciate the viewpoints of both students and teachers. (link)
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I've had teachers that I have special relationships with and others I have nothing but platonic relationships with. I had this one teacher who was so scatter brained that some days he'd treat me like I wasn't there and other days he would be very friendly. Consider that she is an (older I assume) busy woman and has good/bad days.
But does it seem like she's friendly when she needs a babysitter? Don't let her misguide you if she considers you more of a student and helper than a friend.
I would suggest inviting her to dinner at a restaurant some where for an occasion or just to "Catch up" and see how she reacts. Let her know how you enjoy talking to her and the friendship and see how she responds. You can continue to be working partners in class and even outside but if there isn't a friendship relationship there then don't be dissapointed. Just make the terms clear for both of you.
Good luck,
-Abby
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Why is it that I do better, socially, with people older than me? I'm 20 and almost all of my friends that I talk to are 30 and up. Some are even much older...like in their 60's and 70's. I'm not sure why but I feel like I relate better with them and have better conversations. My time spent with older people is more enjoyable than with those my own age. Is this normal? (link)
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Some people are what I like to call "old souls". Their more mature than their peers. I'm a teenager but some of the things I hear other teens talk about sound incredibly stupid and immature to me. So it's not abnormal that you may find more things in common with someone who is older then you.
-Abby
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Okay, I'm 14, and I received the 3rd and final Gardasil shot on August 5, 2009. I know it's suppose to help prevent me from getting some of the HPV strains but not all of them. Before I started the vaccinations I didn't read up on the Gardasil itself.
I've now read many stories about all these girls having these life-threatening problems, and even death in some cases. I know these things are serious because I had read them on reliable sites. My problem is that I can't remember the sites I had gone to that had this information on it.
I want to show my mom that she and my little sister shouldn't get the vaccination because of the serious side effects associated with Gardasil. Could someone send me some reliable links so I can show them to my mom so she can avoid these sorts of problems? Please and thank you (link)
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http://www.google.com/search?source=ig&hl=en&rlz=&q=gardasil+side+effects&aq=1s&oq=gardis&aqi=g-s4g1g-s4g1
That wasn't too hard, was it?
I haven't had any side effects of gardisal and I believe they are pretty uncommon. The biggest risk is girls thinking they are protected from STDs, which isn't the case. They aren't 100% protected from cervical cancer either.
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For weeks I have been iffy about even writing this.
I am young 18 and just got married in August. I am pregnant that is not why we got married but I think we rushed into it. We were planning the wedding already had my wedding dress before i found out I was Pregnant.
Sometimes I find myself regretting getting marred My reasons. I wanted to work days and go to school nights. It would be tough but id be able to better myself for me and my family he through a fit and didnt support me at all. told me either work or go to school but advises me to work because we need the money. Being pregnant I have my mood swings like most if we have an argument its all my fault he will yell at me and blame me then make me feel guilty by saying oh its always all my fault i forgot your so perfect. sometimes he makes im crap. If i feel nauses or sick at night or anything and he wants sex he pouts and acts like he is mad by not saying a workd until he gets it then goes to sleep. he goes hunting, fishing, baseball teams and tournaments etc. anything he wants and i dont argue about it i just let him.
I have asked a million times to look harder for a job. he works 2 days aweek at a sale barn doing something he likes i work full time on my swallon feet 40+ hours a week and come home exhausted and tired. its like he dont care he doesnt want to even try to look he put an app. in at burgerking one app.. in 5 weeks? we live at my dads. which i dont feel is save but dont have a choice. hes lazy
and to top it off he always wants to spend money. i used to get food stamps which just stopped but hed want a gallon of tea every 2 days. go out and buy food he wants all the time because hes to lazy to cook one thing or wait for it to get done. as soon as he gets paid he goes and spends most of the money on garbage food and gets mad when i tell him i dont want it id rather eat food i cook at home.
I love my husband to death trust me and want to work things out but i dont know what to do i talk to him about it and itslike it is in one ear and out the other. (link)
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This man isn't good for you or your future baby, and the the first step to making progress is admitting that. It's great that you love him, but that fact alone won't help you build a stable and sucessful life for your family. He needs to improve or you need to part ways with him. I know it sounds harsh, but you are bringing a baby into the picture! Your child deserves the best and if he can't give it to him or her then he isn't the right guy or father.
If he loves you he will be willing to change. You need to have a heart to heart with him. I suggest having your father have a "man to man" talk with him as well, since he is experienced and his maturity might affect your husband.
I think you should make a list of reasons why you love him and want to make the relationship work, and another list of how he can make it work and give it to him. He needs to know how tired and frustrated you are. Tell him about the life you want, and how you want the two of you to work hard to accomplish it. Stress that you have a partnership, a team, and that you alone can't support it.
Could the both of you go to marriage counseling? Someone at your local church may be willing to see the two of you for free. He needs to see that he needs to give more to the relationship.
Offer him encouragement. Men sometimes need a push in the right direction, haha. Help him look for a job, write resumes, etc.
Use your resources; your friends, family, community. Child caring classes are usually available and would be great at showing you two how to deal with the new responsibility. However he can realize that he needs to step up is what needs to happen.
If he cannot after all of your efforts be a good partner to you, then you might just have to seperate. I think it would be the healthiest for you. Think about it, do you want two babies in the house? You can try to get child support and share custody to make your load lighter. Don't think that single parenthood is impossible, because it isn't. It can be hard but potentially better for you and the baby if the father isn't ready for the responsibility.
So please take careful consideration, talk to your husband, and make the best choice for the baby, because that is who it's about now.
Good luck,
-Abby
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where can i get a playboy miss may necklace?? (for a sort of low price?) (link)
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I've seen playboy stuff at Spencers and Hot Topic, and I also checked out the official online store and found these Miss May items
http://www.playboystore.com/nshop/product.php?view=detail&productid=PB-1510805&startColor=&dept=women&category=Jewelry§ion=JewelryCollection&groupName=PlayboyJewelryCollectionPlaymateMonth&both=yes
http://www.playboystore.com/nshop/product.php?productid=PB-1454805&view=detail&dept=women&category=Jewelry&groupName=PlayboyJewelryCollectionPlaymateMonth
http://www.playboystore.com/nshop/product.php?productid=PB-1522305&view=detail&dept=women&category=Jewelry&groupName=PlayboyJewelryCollectionPlaymateMonth
But I didn't see the necklace. They sell necklaces off of the official site but I don't know how trustworthy that is.
https://www.metalmafia.com/themetalshop/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=1538
http://www.shopwiki.co.uk/_Playboy+Miss+May+Necklace+Playboy+Bunny+Silver+Plated+Necklace+with+an+Emerald+Birthstone
Good luck,
-Abby
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What is a breakfast that can keep me full for about 6 hours? and that is also healthy for you. but mainly to keep my full with no worries of being hungry....? please and thank you. (link)
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Being full six hours is unrealistic, the point of meals is to keep you fueled through out the day.
Oatmeal is filling, anything with protein is also filling. I suggest a protein shake with thick oatmeal and some fruit and a piece of toast or something. It's a big breakfast but it should keep you full. Stuffing yourself to stay full will leave you feeling slow and groggy early in the morning, and thats not good.
Pack a snack like a energy bar to munch on if your hungry during the day.
Good luck,
-Abby
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so last night i found this kitten..she's abanonded...i cant keep her. i mean she's real cute, but i already have two other pets. i dont want to just dump her again, and it's hard for me to find her a good home...i cant find anyone that would want her. sooo..any suggestions on how i can help her find a good home quicker? (link)
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Look in the newspaper ads for someone who's missing a kitten, though she might be a stray. You can look in the phone book for shelters that adopt out animals, but make sure they are no-kill shelters. Word of mouth is good too, ask your friends to ask around for anyone who wants a kitten.
You could try craigslist, but I suggest meeting with the person and talking to them before giving them an animal.
Good luck,
-Abby
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I just moved to San Antonio, and I was a little desperate to make friends with any of my neighbors. I am white and I befriended a Mexican man, Carlos, living nearby. I started loaning him money and buying him drinks. He made it very clear that he didn't want to date me, but wanted a purely physical relationship.
I ended up befriending his sister "Jenny" also, and she told me that he didn't like me and was using me. I bought her drinks and smokes, not really caring about the money.
I was a little hurt, but continued to hang out with him and loan him small dollar amounts here and there. Although he did try to put the moves on me, I said "no".
Carlos and his friend, Jon, came over to my house one night, so they could download music and play on the internet. They were mad that I had talked to Jenny about my "giving" relationship with Carlos. Carlos told me never to talk about it with anyone. I said Jenny was a hypocrite, because I had bought her stuff also. Jon later told Jenny what I had said.
Jenny confronted me on the sidewalk infront of my house that I had talked about everyone behind their back. She called me immature. She brought up the relationship with my neighbor and my feelings for my neighbor infront of other neighbors. I was mortified, I apologized and ran inside why she still ranted. Carlos watched the whole exchange from his yard and let his dog go into my yard. He smiled while it chased me in the house. I no longer have any feelings for Carlos. However, I did want to get along with my neighbors and make friends.
I am afraid to leave the house, and I plan never to talk to my neighbors again. Can you give me any advice? (link)
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These people sound like trash to me. Honestly, if they think they are leading a real, equal friendship with you, they need to re-evaluate their relationships. Don't let people like that put you down. I know it's hard when you just want friends and people to like you.
You need to show these people you are serious and can't be used. I suggest calling animal control or the police to lodge a complaint about their dog chasing you. You can arange for someone to go to their house and speak to them about it, because it is dangerous.
Break contact with them and if they harrass you, call the police. It is a crime.
I recommend talking to other neighbors and trying to make some allies. Don't talk about your situation up front, but ask if they heard anything about it and see their opinion. If you can sway some neighbors to your side, you will feel better and more secure.
If you ever talk to them and they try to create an altercation, simply say you apologize for offending them but you are also offended by their gross behavior and you wish to let things go and remain civil. You don't have to be friends with them but being able to not argue is important.
Just try your best to be mature and if it escalates see if there is a neighborhood program or home owners association in the area to report them to. If you are really scared, call the police. It's your neighborhood too, don't let them scare you.
Good luck,
-Abby
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is it possible to get a blackberry with verizon without getting the extra 30 dollars a month extra for internet? i dont really use or need internet when im away from the house. (link)
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I'm pretty sure its mandatory that you get the internet. When I tried to get the motorola Q from verizon they said I had to sign up for internet and didn't have a choice. A blackberry is pretty useless without internet anyway, you might as well get a regular phone.
Good luck,
-Abby
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ok, I am 16 years old. ever since i started my period 6 months ago, it has NEVER been irregular. However, this month, about a week before it was supposed to come, i started having a little bit of brown discharge, and now it is actually time for it to come and the discharge is a darker brown, but it's still not here. Last month i started working out every day, but i stopped a week before this scheduled period now. Could that have a factor on when it's going to come even though I stopped a week before it was scheduled to come? I am not sexually active and as far as i know, I am not stressed out. What could be the reason for this? (link)
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Periods can be irregular, even if you have had a regular schedule. Exercising more then usual could change it. I was pretty regular in the beginning but my dates began jumping around the calendar, from the beginning of the month, the middle, and then the end. Nothing to worry about, especially since you aren't sexually active. And the brown discharge could actually be your period. Sometimes i have lighter days then others and days with nothing.
-Abby
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16f I have been talkn to this guy for a while now like over 6 months on and off. He did something messed up to me that we stopped talking. that was a while ago so weve been fine now and then he got mad at me and we stopped talking for like a few days and its been a week that were talking again but its like we never have a full conversation, he answers my texts really late, or doesnt at all. So i heard that to get a guy to want you more its good to act like you kind of dont care and dont be waiting by the phone or let him text you. So guys, does this work when a girl doesnt talk to you.. do you want her more and does it make you talk to her? (link)
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If he thinks you're available for him whenever/wherever, then he might lose interest, or just not work to talk to you. If he thinks your convienant then he won't put effort in. Give him a taste of his own medicine. Don't respond to some texts, answer late, give a few one word answers or sound uninterested. Soon enough you'll have him thinking. Don't do it for too long though, or he may think he's bothering you.
-Abby
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