Stephagy's advice column

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Q: How do you know when you're in love?
What does it feel like?
What will the 2 people feel bout eachother?

ITs something unexplained. Its when ...um ..well your stomach twists and your heart flutters. When they kiss you time stops and your thoughts are just on you two becoming one. And remebering moments that you had together make you blush and giggle gaily. sigh so romantic. Love is when your breathe is completley taken away by every touch, every memory, thought. I guess they don't call me a sucker for romance for nathing lol. Tell me what you think ok
Eiriyuki@yahoo.com
FOREVER,

Q: When i was seven years old my mom [lets call her tina] and her friend [lets call her jenn]went away and i was left with *jenns daughter shauna at *jenns sisters house [lets call her jamie] well *jamie has a son john who was 14 at the time. Shauna was asleep and john had his friend jeff over, also 15. john made me do it with him and go to third with him and he said if i didnt then he would kill me.. is this rape? i am asking this years later because it still bothers me=/

ABSOLUTLEY!!! OMIGOSH THAT IS SOOOOO RAPE! Maybe you should get therapy and go to spas and beaches to relax yourself. Relaxing is always a great way to revive yourself, or forget about things. tell me how it goes ok.
eiriyukipicese@yahoo.com
FOREVER

Q: There's this one girl in my group of friends who moved into town after we all became friends and we sort of accepted her into the group. The thing is, she's always the subject of our joking and teasing, because sometimes she is really bossy and gives empty threats randomly every three seconds (like I borrow her pencil and she says, "Give me back my pencil or I'll punch you soo hard!" even though we all know she never will) sometimes I feel sorry for her, but she gets on my nerves a lot. What do I do?

Like pink princess said. Even if other people tease her you shouldn't because that makes you worse than them. Besides maybe she feels that no one understands her. She might even start bullying peopl,e because of you guys so try not to do it as much. I used to have a friend like her annoying and all. But after a year I got to know her better and now she's my best friend. You never know she might become yours as well e-mail me at
eiriyukipicese@yahoo.com
FPREVER,

Q: i am really having a hard time right now. my parents and i are always fighting.and im not gunna say its allt there fault but like i juss start screaming or they juss start screaming and i cant take it. there so much anger going on in my house. they just dont like me. i cant remember the last time they said "i love you" i cant talk to them about anything. i mean like we say hi and bye and stuff but thats about it. i dont get along with them and they dont get alng with me. i alway dont really have "friends". like sure there are people that i hang out with on the weekends and at school and stuff but i dont have friends like every one has where you can like cry on their sholuder and spill your heart out. not have friends has just put so much on my mind that i cant concentrate in school and my grade are slipping and then my parents scream more. also i have never had a boy friend and thats not that much of a big deal but it make me feel more unloved. i need someone to open up to. i have thought about killing my self many times. i even cut my self for a while but now i stopped. i cray my self to sleep EVERY singlt night. i need someone. i feel so lonely and deserted

im 13/f if that helps

Try telling them how you feel. My mom she put so much pressure on me so I started cutting cuz I felt that I was the mother of my baby-brother and not her. But I realized that she takes care of him everyday. So I stopped and was more appreciative. But this is different this is a faze wher I went through last year. You shoul try talking to them. Talk with each of them in private. Tell them how much you miss there hugs and the I Love You's they said to you. Maybe they'll be more compassionate. Also try to relax yourself that ALWAYS helps. soak in the tub, go to the beach, Go some where where there's moving water. Take up a hobbie, singing, dancing(really good one) Martial arts( that's also a good one). Ok e=mail me and tell me how it goes or if you just wanna talk I'll always reply that's a promise I can keep ok I'm 14 so I know what your going through alright. I'll cry with you tears. Sometimes people need to be heard. If you really need to talk to someone about your age I'll let youhave my cell# ok but not here. since your a girl. We girls need to band together through good and hard times ok
eiriyukipicese@yahoo.com
FOREVER,

Q: I think that my daughter (14) has been using drugs. She hasn't had it easy and I haven't really helped that. A few of my old boyfriends hurt her and violated her. I've stopped dating because of it she doesn't deserve that and I don't want that to ever happen to her again. Recently I've been noticing that she's been coming home after 10 (her curfue is 9) and she acts differently. I've tried talking to her and she says that she isn't doing anything and that she just loses track of time. I don't know what to do. I'm not a great mother but I'm trying as hard as I can. Does anyone know how I could talk to her about this or how I can help her if she really needs it?

I will a rate high to anyone who at least tries thank you ahead of time.

I have seen a lot of cases like these. I may be only 14 but I read like hell. You shouldn't try to be a good mother. You should BE one. Not dating is just the first step to being a good one. I think she feels distants from you because of all your bf's anyway if she is doing drugs you would definitley tell. But try to tske her out more, like go shopping , watch movies. After a while explain to her how much you love her and want to protect her and would never in her entire life let anything hurt her. Make her feel secure around you not the drugs or her friends. Make sure that if she does tell you something like she's doing drugs not to yell at her or punish her cuz it'll only make it worse. Don't push it either. Follow that person's advice if her eyes are blodshot and so on try to get therapy for her and yourself. I hope this works. E-mail me and tell me how it goes ok
eiriyukipicese@yahoo.com
FOREVER,

Q: I really really like this guy named Brian. He's so great and we've been good friends, since 2nd grade. He told me he likes me, but he just wants a break. We danced and hung out at a dance last month, and we had a great time. We started dating then, and we just broke up the other day, because he said he thought of me more as a sister figure and not a girlfriend. I'm totally beat up over the situation, and I'm really not sure what to do. He tells me that he wants to have sex with me (which i wouldn't do, and i think he's joking) he calls me pretty all the time, and tells me he loves me. =( What should I tell him?

OH MAN!! um.. let's see.let's look at the facts. He breaks up with you then he tells you he wants to have sex! I suggest you start to drift from him. Sometimes it might get to a point at which he may start to touch you playfully.But after that things will probably get serious and he might even rape you. Try ignoring him and see what happens. If he asks you why your ignoring him just tell him that he changed and you don't know him anymorwe wich scares you at times. E-mail me and tell me how it goes ok
eiriyukipicese@yahoo.com

FOREVER.

Q: There is this girl named Rachel. When we first met, 5 years ago, I couldn't stand her. But I was her friend because my friends really liked her and wanted us all to get along. Well two years ago I mentioned something about not liking our principal (I have good reason too)and she just exploded at me. She started screaming, "Hannah! You don't need to judge people like that! Judgment is 1 of the 7 unforgivable sins. If you don't stop being evil your going to hell!" Well I got mad and yelled back that she was an idiot and some other stuff *cough*. Well that was two years ago and we resolved our issues, darn those stupid friends of mine, and tried to become friends again. Well now out of no where she has been bad mouthing me and my mother, shooting me hateful glares, make rude comments right in front of me, and declaring that my mother is unfit to teach. Its very annoying so I sent her an email telling her to just leave me alone and be done with it, but she won't stop! How can I make her leave me alone.

Give her a taste of her own medicine. If she cares so much about sins then she must know she's breaking the basic ones. But since that was two years ago maybe you should try bad mouthing her. Sometimes its neccessary. But you should know she'll never leave you alone cuz that's how some people are and the only way is to always be either equal or above her. Don't let her trash you like that. You'll just get hurt worse and worse and the only thing to do before it gets worse iss to get back. Anyway e-mail me and tell me how it goes ok
eiriyukipicese@yahoo.com

FOREVER.
stephagy

Q: Well, I have this HUGE problem. I started to be friends with 4 girls, named; Jess, Rachael, Chelsey, & Mary. Well, ever since I started hanging out with them, everyone's changed, and started to hate Mary, (supposebly they've hated her for a while, but they just never told her) Mary always cuts people down for no reason, at all! It really makes me mad, she'll pick on homosexuals and people who aren't PERFECT. But she isn't either. She'll say that all these popular guys like her, when she's not popular at all, and they wouldn't pay attention to her. Well, we got into a fight the other day because I was "ignoring" her all day. I seriously don't know what to do! When I'm around her it's always like I'm not paying enough attention to her. I'm her only friend, and it makes me mad, because I feel like I'm losing my 3 best friends, and I don't want that to happen. I don't want to be Mary's friend, but I just don't know how to break it off with her. Help? Please.

This is a lot similar to a problem I had back in sixth grade! My best friend was friends with another girl. She was so mean putting other people down thinking everyone likes her. Now that we're both in eighth grade she and I are like enemies. She even said that I was jealous of her because she went out with a guy I used to like but it wasn't true and a lot of people new that. I suggest that you stop being friends with her. As long as your the nice one there's no need to worry. Don't worry about other people hating you because like you said people hate her as well. In order to break it to her, I think since your already ignoring her,you should probably keep ignoring her. If she asks you why then say " I'm tired of you putting other people down just because their not you, in fact your not perfect either. If you can't be true to others and not lie then you obviously can't accept who you are, instead of putting down oters just to make yourself feel better". At least thats what I would say. E-mail me at noriko_keyboard_goddess@yahoo.com and tell me how it goes. ok
FOREVER,

bio

I love helping people, I give pretty good advice at school whenever somebody asks me. I want to study fashion designing in paris then go to japan and study art. I hoping I'l finish my first book and get it published.I'm very athletic. I love Anime. Gravitation, chobits, espicially Spiral.
Um I'm always online, at least everyday checking all my e-mail, for anyone who wants to e-mail me and such. My favorite closing or quote is FOREVER!