leLovely's advice column

is it absolutely necessary to give my boyfriend head before we can have sex? i just hate the whole idea of it and really would rather skip it.. we've done everything else, but does anyone have any experience with just skipping that? or do i just have to suck it up? (i feel like once i do it, then im required to do it again)

any opinions would be nice

You don't have to do it if you don't want to. Nobody has to ever do anything sexual that they don't want to, and they can't be forced into it. Since you don't want to do it, and you just want to go straight to sex, there's nothing wrong with that. My boyfriend's friend did that too. A lot of people do it first because it's just a step closer to sex, because they're not quite ready to go that far yet.

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female.

i masturbate a lot, but i only do it on my clitoris because fingering myself doesnt feel like anything.

am i doing it wrong?

like i dont even feel it when i do & i really want to make it feel enjoyable because whenever my boyfriend fingers me its like nothing happens. it doesnt feel good or like anything.

any suggestions?

It's fine, do whatever you want and whatever feels good to you. There's not really a right way to do it. If you're not getting any pleasure at all, why not ask your boyfriend to rub your clit too while he's fingering you?

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i really want to lose weight. i eat a healthy breakfast and lunch, but the problem is i can't help eating a TON for dinner. i'm on a sports team (but i'm NOT skinny) because we have away games all the time, and all the food that's provided is fast food. or they have granola bars and i always end up eating at least 5. how do i stop? i don't want it to seem like i'm on a diet to the other girls, so i can't bring my own food. should i wait until get home? just eat half? i can't seem to stop eating once i start. the food just looks too good

Maybe you're just so hungry because you're just played a game and haven't eaten since lunch. Bring a healthy snack like fruit or crackers to eat on the way to your game. You're probably just so hungry that you're binging because once the food touches your toungue it tastes too good to stop, and you're eating so much so fast you don't even realize that you're full. When you're eating, try to eat a lot slower and drink more water. It should help you realize that you're not as hungry as you thought you were, and you probably won't end up eating as much. Why do you have to eat the fast food just because you stop? Bring your own dinner or even just a sandwich, and say that you're eating when you get home or you don't really want anything or that you don't have money. Nobody can force you to eat anything that you don't want to. On our rides home from away games sometimes we stop too and when people don't eat we just offer some and we don't think much about it. If you're eating some food, people won't think that you're starving or dieting. Just bring a healthy alternative instead of fast food. =)

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im re-doing my room soon. like im painting my walls and getting all new furniture and everything. my room is like all white now and it has wooden floors so i kinda want to get a rug. if anyone has any cute ideas...

i also want to get stuff from pbteen.com
so if theres any cute furniture from there that you think would look good together and match with a rug and other stuff

thanks xoxo

With a white wall and a wooden floor, you have tons to work with! It's just like when you're wearing a plain outfit, the accessories make it. If you find a colorful comforter, rug, lamps, thing to put on your wall, etc. it would look really good. But if you're looking for colors to paint your room, I just painting mine over the summer. I have two of my walls hot pink, the ones that are across from eachother, and the other two a greenish blueish, but it looks really cool together. It would look neat if you wanted to chose two of your favorite colors that would look good together. I saw somebody with hot pink and lime green, somebody with hot pink, black, and an aqua-ey color, and somebody else's room with lime green and a royal purple, and they all looked REALLY cute. The purple and the limegreen/pink one looked good with a wooden floor.

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I recently had surgery. Recently, as in about a week ago. I had my check-up appointment today and I'm pretty sure they will be taking the staples out. I was wondering if anyone has gone through with the removal of staples. Does it hurt? What does it feel like? Should I take a pain medication before going? I'm kind of nervous; I don't like pain or needles.

Any advice would be great.

The surgery was for appendicitis. My appendix ruptured so I have 3 little holes from the minimally invasive surgery.

I had surgery on my knee over the summer and it was orthoscopic (sp?) so there were a few different small slits/holes and I had staples. Honestly, when I got my staples off it didn't hurt at all. It's probably more relieving than painful. It was quick pressure, a little pinch and then they were off. It's nice because I remember the staples kind of itching and it felt a lot better after getting them off. But, my boyfriends mom got staples taking because she got an ovary, I think, removed, and it hurt for her. You're probably best off asking your doctor if it's going to hurt, because I think it varies from person to person/area to area.

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hi,not to be racist or anything but like i heard the quote
"Black people like their chicken" or something.
What does that mean

it means what it means. it's just basically a stereotype that a lot of people know of.

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I'm having a sweet 16 party next weekend and am down to last minute things. I want to get a tiarra to wear. Any suggestions on what store i can get one for under like $20?

I always see cute, cheap ones at Claires.

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how do i masturbate by myself? i finger myself but is there anything else? thanks for answering

A lot of girls get pleasure by 'rubbing' themselves. If you want some techniques, check out www.solotouch.com

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Me and my best friend are having a birthday party in June. We're planning on inviting 40 people. The thing is, we have no clue what to do. Most of us are 14 and 13. We don't want our party to be boring or anything and we can't think of something that would be REALLY fun. Any ideas?

Since it's going to be in the summer, have it outside. Usually there's a lot more things to do outside. You can have a bonfire. I used to have them all of the time when I was 13, and everybody seemed to enjoy them. Have food! Order pizza or have burgers and hotdogs, along with snacks and drinks. Try not to plan out the activies so much, things will happen on their own. I've tried to plan out everything that we were going to do at a party, and we ended up not doing anything. Just go with the flow and I'm sure that it will be a fun time. =)

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i hang out with the "popular" group at school because im really good friends with them and i also have this friend who's not as popular but i still love her. i've heard alot of people saying that shes trying not to be best friends with me anymore just plain friends, because she thinks im always hanging out with my other friends. im friends with my other friends just as much as she ..like i love all of them but i really dont want to lose her as a best friend. what should i do?

16/f by the way.

You need to have a heart to heart talk with her. These people might have just heard something and completely changed the story around- a rumor. Just confront her. Tell her that you heard that she doesn't want to be as close to you as you were before. Ask her if it's true and why? If it is, let her know that you love all of your friends evenly, it's not like you're chosing a new group of 'more popular' friends over her. Say that you don't want to lose her as a best friend. Just talk it out with her.

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well prussian blue are they really bad and from the kkk becase well i heard a song that popped out and it was pretty good its called ill bleed for you has anyone heard it? and can you tell me background information on them and are they really racisit?

Yes, they're extremely racist. They basically are white nationalists. They believe that whites are superior to other races. Their parents, mostly their mother, has taught them racist ideas since they were born. Sometimes they give Nazi salutes, and they have a grandfather wears a swastika belt and has Nazi symbols on his truck. They both believe that Hitler had great ideas and was a good man. They also sing about racist ideas, too.
If you want to read more, go here or try to google them and get more info.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prussian_Blue_(American_duo)

or

http://abcnews.go.com/Primetime/story?id=1231684&page=1

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i recently lost 4 pounds. im 5'3" and 137 lbs now. but i was just wondering is this okay? and if anyone has those BMI calculators id love that. thankss.

You're at a normal weight.

http://www.nhlbisupport.com/bmi/

If you want to check it out yourself. =)

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ok so everytime i have my period i get bloated. im a skinny person so when i get bloated i look pregnant. im not exaggerating, ill gain about 3 inches on my waist when im bloated. are there any foods to reduce bloating? why do woman get bloated when we have our periods?

"Women bloat when they have periods because their bodies begin to retain more water, causing the body to swell and creating a bloating sensation. The swelling causes the skin to stretch, making parts of the body sensitive to pressure."
- http://www.ivillage.co.uk/health/ghealth/discon/articles/0,,181033_182121-1,00.html

To reduce bloating, cut salt out of your diet. Midol also helps, too.

"Water tablets are diuretics and they increase the amount of salt and water passed in the urine, so as Liz says 'you have to go to the loo a lot.' There are several types of diuretic, some of which lead to loss of potassium so doctors often prescribe a potassium supplement with them.

An alternative to water tablets for fluid retention with PMS is to try vitamin and mineral supplements, especially vitamin B-6 (Pyridoxine) and vitamin E, gamma-linoleic acid (GLA), and calcium and magnesium. These can be effective in lessening breast tenderness and bloating. "

(also from the same website)

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can you wear a tampon while you sleep?
I have a really heavy flow and already had a bad leak while I was sleeping and I don't want to ruin my clothes. I can set my alarm clock and make sure I wake up before having it in eight hours.

Oh and I had a tampon in and a pad underneath and I still got allot of blood on the pad. Did I do something wrong when I put the tampon in?

I honestly wouldn't risk it. You can try to use heavy overnight pads. Sleep on a towel. If you buy underwear that you really don't want to get ruined and gross, go out to like WalMart and get a cheap pack of underwear to wear to bed, so that you're not staining and destroying your other underwear. If you bleed through, make sure to soak your clothes in cold water right away.

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Is it normal to have one boob thats larger than the other?
Is there anything you can do so that they are the same size without stuffing?

Thanks.

And if it helps I'm almost 15.

If one is slightly larger than the other, then it's fine. A lot of girls have this problem. Nobody will notice if one boob is a little bit bigger than the other one, so don't worry.

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Do labias vary in size? Mine seems kind of .. long, like it hangs down a little bit out of the outside lips of my vagina. Is this normal?

It's normal, don't worry. The size of it varies from person to person.

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how come my left boob is killing me and my right is just fine? my left has a little ball in the front and it hurts bad.

Definately get that checked by a doctor. That could be a sign of breast cancer.

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i'll take any answers but i'd like guys opinions too.
for guys, if your at the mall, how do girls normally catch you attention ?

and for anyone, how is a good way to get a guy's attention at the mall? like if its a guy you see there alot but never talk to him but you know he's noticed you before?

If you walk past eachother and he's looking at you, look at him right in the eyes back. I saw someone at a fair two years ago and that's how we got eachothers attention and we still talk now! If you want to start talking to him, maybe ask him a stupid question and then take it from there. I've met a lot of new guys with my friends by just doing that.

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Alright im gonna be excercising to lose some weight but a thought occurred to me. i noticed since well im fat (just avergae) that means certain body parts are like big like my thighs for example. well i have a lot of hair all over my body. when i get skinny will the hair on my thighs/upper body start to like fall off or will the hairs move closer to each other and will i start to have thick hair? because since my body structure is gonna change i wonder if my thighs/upper body are either gonna look hairier or less hairier. i would hope it would look less hairier cause i look like a gorrilla. lol

You'll look the same, unless you starve yourself, then I'm pretty sure you lose hair (not positive) -but don't do that!

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