Take advantage of my years of personal experience in many areas of life; relationships, spirituality and much more. I'm here to serve YOU. Just ask! Be prepared to hear truthful advice.
E-mail: mylordwon@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: USA
Occupation: ~Screenwriter~ * ~Speaker~
Age: 45
Member Since: June 3, 2004
Answers: 190
Last Update: May 10, 2015
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MY FRIEND ALISA IS A 34 YEAR OLD SINGLE MOTHER OF 3 YOUNG GIRLS. ALISA HAS BEEN GOING DOWN HILL FOR SOME TIME NOW, HER HOUSE IS ALWAYS DIRTY AND SHE SPENDS MOST OF HER TIME LOCK INSIDE HER BATHROOM
SMOKING CRANK. 3 WEEKS AGO SHE GOT A VISIT FROM CPS AND THEY GAVE HER A DRUG TEST - SHE FAILED SO HER CHILDREN WERE SENT TO LIVE WITH ALISA'S DAD AND STEP MOM UNTILL SHE CAN GET ENROLLED INTO A YEAR LONG REHAB PROGRAM. THE PROBLEM IS SHE NOW HAS THE FREEDOM TO RUN THE STREETS WITH OUT DRAGGING HER KIDS ALONG - THATS ALWAYS EASYER TO DO. SHE HASN'T EVEN TRIED TO FIND A PROGRAM YET AND WHEN I ASK HER ANYTHING ABOUT HER PLANS SHE SAYS SHE DOSN'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH DRUGS AND DOSN'T FEEL SHE NEEDS REHAB. SHE SAYS SHE LOVES HER GIRLS AND THAT SHE WILL GO JUST BECAUSE SHE'LL NEVER GET THE KIDS BACK IF SHE DOSN'T.
EVERY WEEK FOR 3 WEEKS SHE HAS PROMISED THAT COME NEXT MONDAY SHE'LL TRUN HER SELF IN TO A CENTER - YET SHE IS STILL NOT THERE.
I'M SO VERY DISAPPOINTED IN HER , IF SHE DECIDES TO JUST LET THE KIDS GO AND STAYS IN THE SHAPE SHE IS IN RIGHT NOW THEN I WANT NOTHING MORE TO DO WITH HER !
WHAT DO YOU THINK I COULD DO TO HELP HER MAKE A WISE DECISION ? (link)
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She has to admit there's a problem. She has to WANT to give up the drugs. Doing it solely to get her kids back won't work because the root of the problem will still be there.
Adiction is a merciless master. The drugs are her god and the only way she will ever overcome this is to CHOOSE the God that saves. That God is Jesus Christ. Worldly methods can help ease the pain like Tylenol relieves a headache, but only Christ can heal the source of her problem.
To help her make a wise decision, get her a bible and point her to Jesus. If YOU don't know Jesus, read the bible yourself first. Start with the book of John. You will be amazed at it's healing power. My husband overcame alcoholism - hasn't had a drop in years. He chose Jesus and his life was transformed.
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I have two younger sisters. I suspect the youngest is doing drugs. She has been divorced three times and is currently living with a schizophrenic boyfriend. She has three children and I am very concerned for her and have told her so. I have told her she needs to change the way she lives.
The other sister babies her and tells her that she's just had rotten husbands and bad luck. She tells her things like, "Oh, poor baby."
How do I approach this sister and tell her that she is hurting her by babying her? (link)
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I believe that you need to be as frank with your sisters.
But first, lets consider the depth of how you've spoken to your youngest sister about your concerns for her. If you haven't already, you need to specifically ask the sister you suspect is using drugs about her drug use (how often, how much, for how long, etc). Drug use is a manifestation of an
addictive spirit, so before there was drugs, there was probably something else (perhaps contributing to her divorces?). If she gets defensive and angry, so be it- you've planted a seed of thought. She will seriously think about what you said. It's easy to rationalize our behaviors when the world is telling us what a raw deal we've gotten in life.
In our society, everybody's a victim. When we go
through life feeling that we've had it so bad, we think it absolves us of personal responsibility. It doesn't. We are all responsible before God for our choices and actions; He won't accept rationalizations and excuses of why we didn't obey His laws.
When you speak to your middle sister about the situation, you then can start out by saying " I've
talked to (youngest sister) about drug use, etc".
You've laid a foundation for then talking to her about her responsibility in the situation. Don't use accusing statements like "you should" or "you shouldn't"- Say "I feel that (youngest sister) needs....". Most times, people think they're helping to make a person feel better by saying "Oh, poor baby", not realizing that they're paving the way for more destructive behavior. When they see that they are just enabling the downward spiral of addiction, they will hopefully adjust the way that they deal with the person.
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Where does the word "Patriotism" come from? (link)
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Patriotism-
The word "Patriotism" comes from the Greek word
"patris", which means fatherland or homeland.
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Who was the first Pope of the Roman Catholic church? (link)
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My answer is based on what the Cathloics claim only. This is NOT what I personally believe.
The Catholics say that it was the apostle Peter. They say that Jesus established the office of Pope when he said to Peter "And I also say unto thee, that thou art Peter, and upon this rock I will build my church; and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it." (Matthew 16:18 ASV.) The catholic church regards the
pope as it's visible head and Jesus as it's invisible and supreme head.
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I couldn't help but read your advice to a question , and i think that your advice would be valuable .(okay , you might be in some other religion , but just to let you know , i am a Christian )
There is this guy i like in my church , and i am attracted to him . I want to know if i should start flirting with him , or if i should leave him alone . He is three years older than me , making him 17 . I know that he is really sweet and would never hurt me , should we go out . How do i know if he is right for me ? Also , a not really relevant question that i wish to ask you is " Is kissing and touching in a relationship before marriage okay in Gods eyes ? "
Thanks for your time ,
Laura. (link)
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Hello Laura,
I am a Christian because I have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. I assume since you call yourself a Christian, you have a relationship with Jesus too.
First let's address the flirting issue. My advice is to not flirt with him or any guy. Flirting leads a guy on and they are then put in a place of temptation. I say this because a girl desires an emotional relationship and the flirting may satisfy that emotional need for the moment, but you will want more and more emotional satisfaction. Guys desire a physical relationship and flirting will only intensify that desire in them in the form of lust. Lust is sin whether emotional or physical. If you truly want to please God, don't put any guy in that position. Christian men are still human and can fall.Trust your relationship with Jesus.
Second, kissing and touching in a relationship. I'm going to assume by touching you mean appropriate touch like holding hands. Kissing and appropriate touching in and of itself, I believe, is not wrong (in other words, it's not sinful). However, God sees the heart. And He knows where these actions will lead. Don't shop for relationships. By that I mean don't bother with dating. Dating leads nowhere but to a broken heart. It is probably more truthful to say "he would never INTENTIALLY hurt me". Hurt will occur in some form. Let God give you the man He has for you.
The enemy of our soul is out to get us, and he hates obedience to God. It can be tough when you want so much to be loved and your emotions grab onto someone. But you must resist. It's tough, even for Christian girls and guys, to be put under peer preasure (especially in this day and age) But you must resist.
God will show you the man He has for you in His perfect timing. Stay pure sexually, keep your emotions pure too, and you will reap awesome benefits.
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My daughter is 35 and finally able to attend college. She desperately needs a grant. She and her husband both work, but they're in debt from being unemployed for a year. They both have good jobs now. Where should she look on the Internet for help?
Thank you!
Audrey (link)
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Audrey,
There are hundreds of thousands of possible sites on the internet for college grants. I suggest starting a search with the obvious heading of “College Grants” and narrowing it down to your situation - women, over 30, married and ect.
I have contacted a professor I know at a university on the East coast regarding your question. He has not gotten back to me yet, but when we connect, I'll ask if he knows of places that most people may not think to look for college grants and email the information to you if so. Leave your email at mylordwon@yahoo.com if interested.
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Forgive the subject crossover. How is a married woman to act/respond/be toward a husband that is, at best, a lukewarm Christian? He says he is not "ready" to return to church after a years-long absence. He's been once with me. I, however, have been completely transformed and walk daily with Christ. How am I supposed to allow him to be the head of the family when his actions sometimes go against what I know is right? When I try to talk to him about these things, he cuts me off, gets irritated and refuses to talk about it. I pray every day for him. Life gets a bit touchy sometimes and I feel a bit lost in this area. (link)
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Been there! The circumstances may be different, but I was in the place you described. I was walking with the Lord, but my husband was not. He was an alcoholic and it was his god. It was hard to submit to a man that cared very little about the Lord. He would do and say things that I knew were wrong, but I didn’t know what to do about it. I know the frustration.
God tells us in His word that He is a Father to the fatherless and a Husband to the widow (Psalm 68:5). Although your husband is not dead in a physical sense, from what you’ve described, he’s dead in a spiritual sense. My husband was spiritually dead. We separated for 18 months. In that time, the Lord worked on us separately. My husband came back transformed and alive in Christ and I had grown to know how to submit to him.
I am NOT telling you to separate from your husband. But don’t be surprised if the Lord allows that. In a remodeling project, a house must be gutted and the old removed, before the new materials are brought in and put up. God is remodeling your husband because of your prayers. Don't give up on the power of prayer. Keep praying for your husband. God is doing His work, you just can’t see it all yet.
I prayed for my husband for years while he was drinking. God did His work in him. My husband has not had a drink in almost 8 years and walks strong with the Lord. He is NOT a recovering alcoholic. He is an overcomer by the blood of Christ.
Trust the Lord. I’ll pray for ya!
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You told me that you lay on your bed. I sit outside at night. That seems to work, and Job's friend Elihu reminds me that whatever is imperfect about my life, I still have much more than I deserve. I understand that this is a time for repentance about my attitude, but it doesn't change. I still long for what God has not granted, and am not thankful for what He has so graciously given. Help!
JoAnne Potter
rahabfreed(maybenot)@hotmail.com (link)
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JoAnne,
Perhaps God is working on patience as well. That is always a hard one. Judging from your statement, my understanding is that you are looking for a clean heart. Pray Psalm 51:10-12 with everything you got. Wrestle with God until He gives you what you're asking for. It may take a moment or it may take a while, but don't give up. Cling to Him.
The Lord has promised you His forgiveness. He says in His Word that He will never leave you or forsake you. He has promised you His love and His faithfulness. Do you believe Him?
Cindy
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Hi Cindy,
I have a relative who can consume chocolate by the pound! She's been going through some stress lately, and her eating habits have really weirded out.
I know that chocolate has caffeine in it, as does coffee and tea. Is that why a person would crave it so?
Thanks so much!
Catherine (link)
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Catherine,
This is an excellent question! Chocolate has caffeine that can make a person crave it, but more so, it has high levels of fats, carbohydrates, and protein that the body craves. This is even more of a craving problem for women then men due to our hormon make up. A woman tends to desire chocolate because it's a source of energy and for a woman that's stressed out, well... she needs all the energy she can get. However, there are healthier ways of doing it.
Cindy
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What's the difference between a metaphor and a simile? "My brain is like silly putty" for example-- which one is that? (link)
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A simile has the word like or as which compares one thing to another. Your example question is a simile comparing the brain to silly putty. A metaphor is an implied comparison which uses a word picture. For instance, the line, "All the world's a stage and we all must play a part" is a metaphor.
It's a wise investment to purchase a grammer rules reference book. Writing is something you will do, to some degree, all your life.
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