Hi, My real name is Daniel. Im an expert on youth affairs (issues) and you can ask me questions on:
Love and Relationships
Sexuality
Dating
Puberty
And anything else to do with youth/teenagers
Drop me a line!
I give advice from my point of view.
So go ahead ask me a question.
Ill give you my best advice.
See you soon.
jumadel
Gender: Male
Location: U.K, England, Greater Manchester
Occupation: Expert in Youth Issues
Age: 15
AIM: Give people expert advice for FREE!
Member Since: June 6, 2006
Answers: 432
Last Update: July 23, 2006
Visitors: 21716
Main Categories:
Love Life
Love Life
Love Life
View All
|
| |
|
Im 13 yrs old. and still havent got my first kiss =. i feel like eberyone else has & its really bothering me.& i want to get a boyfriend. (link)
| |
Hi, at your age I reccomend you start getting to know girls as friends. You've just become a Teenager and coping with puberty (body change). You have got a few years up your sleave yet. Whats the rush? Your not really missing out on anything at your age, and before you go rushing into these ideas I would first reccomend that you get to know your body and work out what type of boy you like. It is 100% normal to have not had your first kiss. In fact I've heard of people who were 17 and even 25 who havn't had their first kiss. I would also talk to your mother about it. She can give you advice. Remember first get used to your body change. Alot of teenagers start getting into the relationship world when they are like 16, 18 or early twenties. Daniel.
|
|
well.. ok.. i just broke up with a guy i had been dating for a year and a half.. and i started goin out with this other guy.. my ex still loves me and i love him.. but my boyfriend that i have right is falling in love with me... and i think i am with him to.. so should i just forget about my ex or what?.. i dont know.. but i have another problem.. there is this boy that likes me alot .. that i go to school with.. and he calls me.all the time.. and he tells me he loves me..geezz i dont know what to do!! please help me!! (link)
|
Hi, personally I think your in a good possition. You've pritty much got the boys going after you from the sounds of things. I would ask one out for a date then ask someone else then ask the other guy another day. If you want to know who you like out of the 3 of them then you've got to ask yourself:
What qualities do I want in a guy?
Does one of them guys match my qualities?
if for example you wanted someone who was funny, had humour, thoughtful or generous then if one of these guys matched your qualities then really you've struck gold. Its nice to go out with someone who matches your qualities. Which guy matches your qualities. Then you decide, then theres your answer. Otherwise just go for who you feel more towards. Relax, and take it easy. Some people aren't as fortunate to be in your shoes. Enjoy every bit of it, you will meet your match, you will see. Daniel.
|
My bofriend and i have been together for about 3 months and now i'm moving I won't return his calls because I'm afraid that I'll get to close to him and break my and his heart when I leave.Am I wasting our valuable time together or am I preventing a broken heart???????????????
yours truly,
please not another broken heart (link)
| |
Hi, it sounds as though you are trying to avoid a broken heart. But would you like to see him again while you still can? If you do, then you should have a last date. You know say goodbye by finishing it with dinner at a restaurant. Whats stopping you from keeping contact over the phone and being mates? Daniel.
|
|
K ... I reallly like this guy we talk all the time on the computer when im on and hes a totall hottie and weve talked face to face but i dont see him this offten but anyways i REALLLY like this guy like alote ! ... and everyone says hes a total flirt and he flirts with me how do i knoe if he likes me or not .. and i reallly want to get him to notice me how do i do this ? ... i want him to ask me to go to the movies and i also get really shy around guys .. what should i do ? any advice is goood advice to me ? please help (link)
|
Hi, if you like him, then go up and have a conversation and flirt a bit. Remember these 3 tips when talking to the opposite sex:
1. Compliments
2. Open questions
3. Small talk
and these are what you can do to flirt:
1. Smile alot, look like your interested
2. Toss your hair back a little, stroke your hair back a bit with your hand
3. Make eye contact
body language like using your hands when speaking is also good. But most of all, guys like girls who are confident and feel good about themselves. Just go up and say hi and something like nice day isn't it? Maybe at the end when you've talked to him for a wee while say something like "you know, we should go out sometime to the movies or dinner, and we can carry on our conversation from there". And if you really wanted to flirt, then at the end of it smile and give him a little wink and walk off slowly. Maybe you could give him your phone number. Good luck!!! If you would like some more advice, then you can go to my advice column. I can tell you more. Try that though, and see how it goes. Daniel.
|
|
ive always thought dat my life was messed up. y live a life dat i hate? dat changed after my boyfren came along. i felt special. i felt LOVED. now his paents are moving to NY. real far away from me. im really sad. i hate myself. i hate everything. i wanna kill myself. im nothing without him.is life really worth living for? how can i get over the person that changed my life? how am i gonna live without him? please some1 tell me wat to do? i feel so hated by god. y is he treating me like this? y is he takin away the love of my life? please help! :( (link)
| |
Hi, right now it is probaly a painful time for you. Why don't you get his phone number and maybe every now and then give him a ring? The fact is, is that sometimes we've got to let go of the ones we love. You sound as though your desperate to be with him. This is not good, because it may seem as though your boyfriend is everything, but your still young. Killing yourself isn't going to solve anything. Im show it would hurt your boyfriend if you did that. What I think you can both do is give each other your phone numbers and E-mail address and have a chat. Get MSN installed on your computer and you could both talk live. The thing is, is that he will likely move on with his life and he might find another girl he likes. Long distance relationships usually don't work, but as hurtful as it sounds you can still be friends. Put it this way, would you rather lose him as a boyfriend but keep the friendship with him or would you rather lose the whole lot and never talk to him again? I know which one I would chose. Besides if you keep friends with him, when you are older the pair of you you could go and visit him, and just see if you can make it work out between the two of you again. Then you could live with eachother. The chances are that he will move on and fall in love with another girl. You can do the same. I know that you don't want to here this but, there are plenty of fish in the sea and plenty of nice guys wanting to be with a nice girl like yourself. Like I said before, would you rather lose him as a boyfriend but remain friends or lose him all together? The best thing you can do is just take some time out away from your love-life and think positive. Then a few months later get out and go perhaps to a disco or you know the school ball, or a night club if your old enough. Then meet someone there that you like. Then come home and tell your ex boyfriend what a lovely time you had. Your ex wouldn't want you to be crying or sad all the time. Take every opportunity that comes your way, meet guys, and have a damn good time. Because your only young for a while and you've got to make the most of it, while you've still got it. If you ever want to talk to someone, then get back to me on my advice column. Chin up, be happy, you may have lost him as a boyfriend but you can still keep him in your life. Daniel.
|
hey,
i havnt seen the guy from the video store for like a week and its drivin me crazy!!! i really really wanna see him- like so bad!!! i dunno how i can feel like this if i dont really kno him that well, i only know him from the times we've spoken!! im worried he isnt workin there anymore which means i will probably never see him again!!! or that if he is still workin there that he doesnt really like me anymore cos i havnt seen him for so long!! i kno this isnt really a question but i dunno wat to do cos its drivin me insane!!! i like him so so so much, i havnt liked anyone as much since my ex boyfriend who i was with for like 7months and yea i always feel sohappy when i talk to this guy from the video store and i seem to always smile when i think about him!! grr!! its makin me crazy cos i cant see him or speak to him unless hes workin!! anyways i kno this wasnt really a question but yea i jus had to say it to someone (link)
|
Hi, how did it go on last time you saw him? I assume you don't have his contact details, so the only thing you can do is just pop in maybe whenever you feel like it and just see if he's there. Don't worry about, I know that sounds silly, but worrying about something to much can sometimes knock back our confidence. When you see him again, just ask him out to the movies or something. This is roughthly what you can say:
You: hi, hows things?
Him: replies
You: Been watching the soccer world cup?
Him: replies
You: yeah things have been busy with school and stuff...
Him: replies
You: Im thinking of going out to the movies this weekend, hey, do you want to come? Only I'm not going with anyone and we could perhaps continue our conversation over dinner after.
Him: yes or no
if yes, then congratulations mission accomplished, if no then quickly shove it off by saying "ok then, maybe another time?". This will show him that your interested. If you are looking to show him signs that your interested, then flirt a bit. Flirting can involve:
Brushing your hair back with your hand
Good eye contact
Smile and really show an interest
Have fun fun fun
See how that goes, and feel free to get back to me if you have any questions or want to chat. I would be more than happy to give you some advice. Good luck!!! And don't worry, he may just be on holiday. Daniel.
|
|
Hey, I'm a 15 year old girl in Austraila. My mum Really doesn't like my bf. She thinks our relationship is "too serious". And my bf doesn't like my mum because she doesn't like him. She's stopped letting me see him except at school. How can i get my mum to let me see him. He's really nice. And how do i get them to like each other? (link)
| |
Hi, one really good way is to sort this out with your mum and arrange the 3 of you to have dinner one day. That would give your mum and your boyfriend time to get to know eachother. If your mother really doesn't like him then the question is why? I think she might want you to mix with people she thinks are suitable but isn't seeing how the relationship is actually working out. She should let you get on with life and let you make more choices and decisions for yourself. Your 15 going on 16 and are growing up and meeting people. This is a great way to get to know boys and girls and form relationships and friendships too. Your mother is probaly just concerned or a bit worried that he might make you feel unhappy or break your heart perhaps. This is something for you and your mother to discuss, and really she should just let you get on with things. Explore the world of socializing and interaction for yourself. She probaly just wants you to be happy and safe. Daniel.
|
|
hi, is it normal to feel suicidal if you family are arguing, not just regular rows, but like, heavy, hitting, swearing, etc....? this is getting to be real bad between my sister and mom. and i cant do anything. i hate it! it starts over something small, and turns huge. my sister usually starts it, but my mom doesnt help either. so is it normal for me to feel suicidal, and usually thinking about it? (link)
| |
Hi, to think suicidal it must be something that is really hurting you. Show, our arguments and family can drive us crazy and sometimes make us feel down, and I suppose we get into a depressive state and think suicidal. But really you shouldn't really be thinking suicidal over something that is tiny like arguments. To think about killing yourself is at the end of the day just a thought but never act on them thoughts. We all feel down and perhaps feel like killing ourselves but it is our actions towards it that isn't good. Suicide is mostly considered through people for example who have cancer or suffering from depression or bi polar, not over an argument. Daniel.
|
|
Well I'm going to Las Vegas for about 6 days. I'm leaving tomorrow and coming back on friday. I have no clue how much to pack. How many shirts, pants, shorts, socks? It's just something I'm not good at. So if you have any ideas on how much and anything else that I should probably bring that I'll probably forget lol. Thank you everyone! (link)
|
Hi, your only going for about a week. So something like this will do:
1. 3 pairs of socks
2. 3 shirts
3. 3 pants or shorts
4. bathroom stuff
5. maybe a hat or sun glasses
Hope that helped. Daniel.
|
16/f
I have horrible cramps. They are so bad I can't stand up straight and I'm almost in tears. How can I lessen the pain? I tried ibuprofen but it's not helping and a heating pad doesn't work either. (link)
| |
Hi, the question is how bad is the pain? It sounds like it could be teenage cramp. Were the muscles get larger and slide across which can cause a little bit of pain. It sounds as though it's painful. A strong panadol with maybe 2-3 tablets taken could work. Try that and if that does not work then go and have a look at a pharmacist shop. They can give you expert advice on what to use. Daniel.
|
I cut my hair about two months ago, really short, and I hated it. It's grown about two inches, which is great! But now, it's stopped growing, literally. I haven't had to get it trimmed in weeks, and it seriously hasn't gotten longer. I want it to be atleast three inches longer so how do I get it to grow faster/longer?
[ I already use Garnier length&strength] (link)
| |
Hi, hair grows at different rates. If you cut it short, then it probaly wouldn't fully grow back until about a month later. Once you cut it you have to wait for it to grow. I don't really know any products that could make it grow faster. Have a look in your local supermarkets and maybe ask your local pharmecist for some advice on what products you can wear. Daniel.
|
|
Hey, Im a 16/f and recently i stayed over and one of my guy friends house, and we were fooling around and ended up having sex, and he told me he wanted our relationship to stay as friends but still be able to do things like that. Do you think thats wrong? (link)
|
Hi, so you have a friend who wants to be a friend but wants to have sex with you? That doesn't really make any sense. Friends don't have sex with eachother but boyfriends and girlfriends can. A friend is someone to talk to, someone who cares for you and has a laugh, someone you can go for a drink with. Friends don't have sex, yes they do give each other a kiss and hug and give each other love, but not in the way that a relationship goes. It sounds as though your having a relationship than being friends. I guess it is wrong to do it as a friend but it is your body and you decide who does things to it. I don't know, it sounds more of a relationship than friendship to me. Have him consider revising on what a friend is. Here are the differences:
Friend: Talk to about anything, trust, go out for a drink, like eachother as a friend, there when you need them. Someone who can give you advice, can have a laugh with.
Boyfriend: Someone you can have sex with and make lots of love, date and make out, spend more time with, can live with, love and like eachother alot, the same things as a friend does only alot more love and things like that.
See the differences? I would have a talk with him about wether or not it is friendship or it's turning out to be a relationship (boyfriend girlfriend thing)
Daniel.
|
|
I need to lose weight and I love to swim. I've heard it was good exercise but i dont know what to do. I would like to lose the majority by the end of the summer. I would really appreciate anyone's help. (link)
|
Hi, swimming is really good because it exercises all of your body while you swim. Do things like:
1. Backstroke
2. Freestyle
3. Diving
4. Butterfly
5. And just swim away
Swimming is an excellent fitness to do. Maybe you can start eating fruit and veg and more milk and water as well. Vitamin tablets and zinc are also good, and meat and noodles are alright. Subway is suppose to be healthy for you. Broccoli and bananas are the best fruit and veg in my opinion. Broccoli is suppose to fight off any cancer cells and bananas are good for your brain. But yeah, swimming is excellent and if you could start doing all these things then good on you. It's nice to know someone is taking an effort in something for once. Daniel.
|
|
hey guys! i`m not really sure the purpose fo me posting this but yeah.. i am a 15/f and a Christian. i met this guy at church about two and a half years ago. his name is nick. he is the sweetest lil kid. he is one year younger than me and really cute! now i know he doesn`t like me but the other niite he called me and we somehow got on the subject of masturbation and whether or not i thought it was riite or wrong. i told him i didn`t think that it was wrong or anything and it kinda escalated from there. he told me to go to my computer and he sent me some sites of porn and i really liked them. then last niite, we watched tons of law and order episodes together because it had chris meloni in it (one of the guys from the sit he sent me). and then i mastubrated with him on the fone several times and he was too. is this wrong? i really don`t know what my question is so any comments or thoughts would be helpful! (link)
| |
Hi, i suppose by masturbating on the phone he can't actually see you doing it. If however you make noises on the phone to masturbating will thats another story of it. As long as your quiet and just do it but without any noises then I fail to see why it's wrong. There is nothing wrong with masturbating anywhere as long as it is away from people and you keep it quiet (no sexual noises) then I suppose there isn't anything wrong with it. Daniel.
|
so a guy from work (we are just friends) asked me to the movies tonight and i talked to my stepmom and she automatically said no because hes too old for me and she doesnt know anything about him, and i told her she could meet him and everything
im going to be 17 in september hes turning 19 tomaro...whats wrong with that?
♥ (link)
| |
Hi, I don't see a problem in the age gap. In fact I don't see a problem at all. You are old enough really to decide who you want to go out with or date and perhaps you could ask your step mother why she thinks it isn't a good idea. There is deffinately no problem in the age gap, and you are both old enough to make these decisions for yourself. Daniel.
|
|
Okay...for the past 3 years I have dealt with cutting and eating disorders and up until recently the problems have been under control...but I have been like..relapsing? I guess that'd be the word. When I get extremely angry or sad the only thing that comes to mind is cutting...idk why! I don't want to die, but it is so easy to relieve pain that way. Of course I haven't cut myself because even when I think about it, my mind wanders which brings me to another point. My mind is always off somewhere thinking about things...things that scare me or challenge me causing me to just be a very nervous person. I can be ecstatic one moment..and then become depressed and hate life the next. I have told my Mom bout this becuz I think I may have ocd or be bi-polar or sumthing but she says it's not true and I am fine...I don't FEEL fine. I feel like a mental case and I don't want it to escalate. I want to think like everyone else, but I can't...everything reminds me of something no matter what it is...all I do is think of past experiences, things I want to happen, things that probably will happen...and I day-dream A LOT. What should I do? Nothing in particular is wrong in my life, but I feel unhappy anyways. What should I do? (link)
|
Hi, it does sound a bit like depression. I know 3 types of people that are well trained on these issues:
Counsellor
Psychologist
Psychiatrist
You say that your unhappy. What exactly is making you feel unhappy. Is it friends, your love life, school what? There must be a percific reason why your feeling like this. Maybe you are bored or lonely and really want to fill your life up more. The simple solution is to join a club and go to disco's or places were you can meet people and make friends. It sounds as though you want to do something with your life but you feel as though it will turn out wrong or maybe your asking yourself the what if questions.
Get a pen and paper out and just write or brainstorm what your problem is. Really take the time to find out what your problem is and then work on what you can do to make the problem go away. Everyone has a problem and the best thing to do is to do our home work on it. Get a better understanding of why we feel this way. Only you truely know how you feel. It is also good to talk. A Psychiatrist is a good person to talk to because they deal with mental health issues and can recomend you try different things such as medication. It is up to you to sort this out. Work out what you really feel inside and why your feeling it. Work it all out and you should come out with what the problem is. Then try and find an answer to the problem and then perhaps talk with someone about it. I hope things improve and get better. It is a difficult time, I know. Daniel.
|
|
Im 15 Years old, and for the past month or something i have been feeling really "out of it" for some reason. I mean there have been some stressful things going on like a couple of my friends have recently started cutting. I'm helping them out. but I'v just felt like I'm floating along, It's weird. I keep changing my mind on alot of things and I get really complicated thoughts about everything like how it will affect everything, even simple things. I get really confused easily. My bf and I had an argument and afterwards I asked him if he thought anything was wrong with me, He said he thought there was, but i dont know what is. Im really confused and i don't like feeling out of it. :( (link)
| |
Hi, I don't know how to describe the feeling but yeah sometimes we just feel out of it or something is on our mind that stops us from doing what we like doing the most. Is there something really on your mind? If there is then whatever is making you feel out of it you need to solve or take time to think about it. Maybe there isn't anothe happening in your life or maybe you feel a bit down from time to time because your not getting what you want out of life which can result in feeling out of it. I don't know how you feel, so I think you have a problem and you need to clear it out. What could possibly be the problem? Whats on your mind thats making you feel out of it? What is happening? If you can answer those questions then your half way there through solving the problem. Think about it carefully and make a decision. Daniel.
|
|
what exactly is an orgasm and how do you know when you are having one? also are they hard to get or do they come easily during sex? (link)
|
Hi, basically an orgasm is rubbing your penis until you get sexually excited and you might sometimes feel a warm really really good feeling and then cum or shall I say sperm leaks out of the top of the penis and then that is called ejaculation. When having sex, it can happen at any time. For some it takes about 20 minutes, for others maybe 10 minutes and for others maybe even less than 2 minutes. If you were having sex I would recommend that you:
a) Do it in a way you feel comfortable
b) When doing it maybe you could kiss her alot and perhaps stroke her hair and explore and have lots of enjoyment
There is no right or wrong time. Everyone does it at different times. Daniel.
|
okkay well i have this smell...you know down there..and i need help on how to make it not stink or anything..i dont have an std or anything it just smells..lol
yeahh sooo help me pwease
thanks! (link)
| |
Hi, teenagers tend to sweat alot and smell down there as well. A shower once a morning and a bit of deodrant should do the trick. Daniel.
|
when a guy is erect, and then he "blows his load," will his penis become unerect?
(link)
| |
Hi, I assume you mean when he ejaculates? What sometimes happens is once the guy ejaculates his penis might soften a wee bit. It will depend on wether or not he is sexually excited and feeling horny and if the girl was giving him lots of pleasure. Daniel.
|
|