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humorist-workshop
Friends with multiple ex's!
So I am a 35 year old female and this is kind of complicated but here it goes. So I am friends with one my ex's right now but we are truly just friends we are not in a romantic relationship at all we just hang out. The this things I started talking to my other ex again a couple of days ago we are going to meet up to see if we can start dating again. My question is Do I need to tell both of them about each other ? If I do when and how soon ? I just don't want to cause any drama or hurt feelings. But I don't want to mention it to soon either.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I will tell you how I navigated seeing several guys at once and then the choice is up to you as to what you do.
After a divorce, I created a dating profile on PC, not one of those swipe on pics of guys on phone app. Now none of these men were exes. I was just meeting them for first time and would meet each one until something I did not want in a man, was exhibited in his behavior. These first times were meet ups and many did not go to a first date. At the first meetup I was open and honest and let the guy know that I was just exploring to find the guy I wanted to date long term and so I would be seeing other guys. I suppose you could state that you have decided to get together as friends with exes, so not just one, but if anything changed from just being friends to something more, then you would let friend exes know. This is what you will be doing and if he's not okay with it, then you both end friendship now. I gave my guys the permission right at the first meetup to decide how he felt and if he wanted to walk away right then, I was okay with that.
I did find the man I wanted a long term relationship with and we're married now 16 years.
I would like to add that finding a partner is hard to do. There are no classes offering relationship training in HS or college or that age bracket so many of us either luck out or crash and fail. Since I was older and I'd already had one long but bad relationship and had kids to think of, I set up guidelines for myself. Well, I can't take the credit, God helped give that info to me. So I have put what I learned into a document I call "Finding Mr. Right." It certainly helped me to find the one I could truly say was my best friend and also lover. If you wish to receive that document, let me know by choosing "search advice columnists" on left and finding me, dragonflymagic, opening my column and making the request from there.
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