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Still doesn't like me-what next?
Buckle up, this is quite the story.
14 year old female. Let's call the boy x and the girl y. I've been friends with x for a couple years now and started to like him. Y is the girl he has a crush on, and I found out.
So I became friends with Y in an attempt to see if she liked him back. I started up a conversation with Y and 3 of our mutual friends about boys. I told Y that I knew X had a crush on her. I was hoping for her to react negatively but instead she acts a bit positively. To make her creeped out, I told her that he keeps a journal about her, gets jelous whenever she talks to other guys, and basically stalks her. I'm close friends with this guy so they all knew that I would know. To prove he was stalking her I told her random yet detailed facts about her daily routine I figured out for myself and claimed I heard it from X.
I got the desired effect. She decided to avoid him.
I went over to X and said I could figure out if Y likes him back, and he told me to do so. The next day I told him that Y did like him back (lies) but she doesn't think he comes on strong enough. This resulted in him flirting with her a lot which only freaked her out more and turned all her friends against him-the desired effect.
On top of this, I forged a notebook in his handwriting similar to the one I described to Y and left it laying around near her. She picked it up and was totally freaked to know I was telling the truth.
So now she avoids him like a hawk and her friends tell him off if he goes anywhere close to her. She asked me to tell him to leave her alone. I went and told him she wants him to ask her out. He went and did it, and she rejected him rather harshly, even with all the stuff I got her believing.
I thought this would give me the opportunity to pick him up, but instead he's been ignoring me trying to flirt with him and has been moping around all heartbroken and shit. It's so ridiculous. How do I get him over her and with me?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
So you tried to eliminate what you saw as the competition. Lets turn this around in answering your question, "How do I get him over her and with me". I want you to imagine a guy in school you can't stand who is trying to ask you out and won't take no for an answer. What can he say or do to win you over? There must be something because you are assuming that just because you like a person, they are going to like you back if you do the right thing. Life doesn't work that way hon. There isn't always logic to attraction. I've experienced plenty of females saying oh that guy is gorgeous, what a hunk and when I look at the guy, I don't like his looks at all. But there is one key element in attraction that it would be wise to learn about now or you may end up married someday to a person you do not like.
I am talking about what people mean when they say they have chemistry together. Its a scientific fact that animals and humans have something called pheromones. You can't detect a smell of it, but this scent is what attracts mates in the animal kingdom. It should be more important for humans to do the same. Not that an attracted person is thinking sex only when attracted but the way it happens for humans is when two people have close to the same type of pheromones and no--this is not something you can change about yourself to make a person desire you over someone else. Granted at age 14, even if people knew about pheromones, that isn't something that may be the top reason why someone is attracted to another. You were thinking of when a person meets someone that they initially liked some traits about and want to be in a relationship to get to know each other better. HOwever, one or both in learning more of each other may find enough things they don't like or that scare them off. This is what I prefer to call aimless dating. The person wanting to have a gf/bf is not thinking of finding a person who is the best match as a best friend or a dating partner. We will in life like some things about a person and not others. This is a learning process and there is much to learn about dating. I can share more if you are interested but it will not help you get a guy just because you like him.
Your reasoning for making up stories about each other that were lies may have sounded like a good choice to you. However, when we lie, those lies come back to bite us in the ass in the future.
So what could happen is that somehow, one or both find out from each other what you told each of them and x will know these were all lies you made up. So before asking for help after the fact of meddling, it may be best to ask for the advice here or of your parents or other adult you trust. NO, you can't ask friends and they are of the same age and according to scientists, the part of the brain responsible for making good choices and seeing possible outcomes ahead of time before taking an action, is something people are not capable of at your age due to the frontal lobe of the brain will not be finishing growing and complete until your mid twenties. So you have about 10 years ahead of decision making that may not have good outcomes. I urge you to begin thinking of using people who are older, past the age when this part of the brain is finally mature and use them as a sounding board. This means any idea's you come up with, you bounce off another, let them hear it and think it out and get their opinion if its a good idea or what consequences there might be.
If you get ideas that you know you don't want to ask of an older person, then likely you already know deep down that there is something wrong with your idea. I would like you to enjoy the rest of your teen years without unintentionally creating more problems for yourself and thats why I have taken the time to explain.
I know it may not sound fair but rarely is anything in life fair. Welcome to the real world.
Consequences for your choice of actions, may include destroying your chances of even being just a friend with x and y shutting you out as well. I wouldn't blame them. YOu would hate and avoid anyone who went through the same lengths to do the same thing to you that you did to both of them. You might want to mentally prepare yourself for that day in case it comes to happen. At that point, the best thing you can do is tell the truth which would be your reasoning for doing it, wanting him to stop liking her and thinking that might make him like you instead. Then you say you are sorry and realize now that things don't work that way. You tell them you'd understand if neither wanted to be friends with you ever again. If you are truly remorseful, it may be better to have a meeting with both and tell them what you've done and apologize before they find out the hard way by some other person learning the truth and telling them first.
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