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My friend is suicidal what should I do?
So my friend is very depressed and I knew she had family problems but I didn't know it was so severe that it caused her to self-harm/ think suicidal thoughts. When she told me she made it clear that she told my other friends and she told them if they made the situation about themselves she would cut them off, I guess it's because she feels unheard. Anyways she said she's been 3 months clean and that's because she said by her 20s if she's still unhappy she will commit suicide. We are currently 19 years old. I don't know what to do I want to get her help because I know what it's like to be suicidal because I too have been there but I feel like I'll be betraying her trust if I go to a hospital and ask to admit her. I want her to be mentally well because I don't know when it will be too late. What if her telling me today was her goodbye message? What should I do?
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Stress that goes unchecked can lead to depression. Depression that goes unchecked can lead to committing suicide. So unless she's had clinical depression most her life or been diagnosed with it recently, then her stress and depression is situational. there are many people who have lived with terrible family problems, physcial health problems, bullying, homelessness, etc....Practically everyone has something. The thing is, that others with situational stress and depression are continueing to go on day by day but without constantly thinking of suicide. . . only wishing things were better. I got a lot of those wishes. Just based on the awful stuff and tragedies of my own family, a dozen sitcoms could be created for TV.
Why can some people handle the same crap every day and never commit suicide? I don't know for sure, but I am willing to bet that if all the non clinical depressed people were to nip the problems in the bud when they are first overwhelmingly stressed,, that there would be a lot less depressed people. And if depressed people were to follow a list of activities Psychologist prescribed to self treat their (non clinical ) depression, that there would be a lot less people ending up wanting to commit suicide. The tough thing is that she is an adult. If she is not willing to start seeking help of her own choice, then a family member most likely would have to give permission for a person to be taken for a psych evaluation. I know someone who recently had to sign to have her sister taken to the hospital after trying to commit suicide. The ambulance and police officers told her the family friends could not sign the paper, she had to. So if her parents are the problem, then perhaps if a sibling knew, or aunts or uncles or even grandparents that might help. The problem is that the people who can help her, or get the ball rolling, do not know she is suicidal. If you attend church or she does, it would be also good to have a pastor talk to her. I've attended some larger churches that also had a counseling ministry, real licensed counselors. Perhaps if she doesn't attend anywhere, you can convince her to attend somewhere with you. Start now, let the pastor get to know you both, and let him/her know of your friends predicament.Ask him to talk to her. Sometimes, a suicidal person feels that no one else cares about what they are going through or dealing with in their minds. She is very likely to not call a suicide hotline. But she needs to be taught skills to learn to deal with her past and how to heal from it. It's not going to happen spontaneously, it will take intervention of people who know her, who tell someone in a position to help her.
A word of caution here, regarding her 'family problems'. It has recently come to light in my own family, that my oldest daughters husband who had horrific stories of sexual abuse and other as a child growing up, was all imagined in his head. He is an untreated person with mental health issues as well as severe autism which his mom whom I recently met has legal documentation of his crazy stories, behavior and actions since he was 2 yrs old. SO if you have not witnessed some of her family crap for yourself, and its just what she repeatedly tells you, same old terrible stories like my daughters husband, then it could be all fake and just point to some mental health issues.
The mom of the son with mental health problems, had him living with her, and then all of a sudden, he moved in with my daughter and he cut off all communications with her and siblings and was not seen again. No one knew where they ended moving to, what their phone numbers or emails were, until CPS stepped in when child abuse of their own children was discovered. Now they are getting professional help.
SO I am just saying that it IS possible that her family may not be the problem and are loving people who would make sure she gets a mental health evaluation even against her will. ONly you might know, or siblings or cousins of hers if you know any. Its a chance you may want to take if you are not so sure that they are all that bad as she says.
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Listen. She is obviously strictly planning on suicide in the future.
Tell someone. It is NOT betraying her trust at all! She might say that now, but she WILL thank you in the future when she's feeling better and gotten the help she desperately needs.
She might hate you at first, but it's the BEST thing to do to TELL SOMEONE WHO CAN HELP HER.
After she's gotten help in a mental hospital or residential, tell her about using subliminal messaging for her depression, that is what helped me A LOT. Tell to listen to it consistently everyday. It's basically the Law of Attraction, which has been proven infinite times that if you DEEPLY believe something, it'll happen.
Subliminal messaging could save her life like it did mine.
DO NOT give up on her. TELL SOMEONE, PLEASE.
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