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My crush knows I like him and we are on a team.
So I am on a team with this guy, and I started growing a crush on him, but I didn't want to ask him out or do anything because I didn't want to impact our team before compition. So I didn't say anything, we became friends and teased each other it was fun, my crush for him grew. Eventually it got harder to talk to him. So I vented to my best friend, she unterstood and tried to set us up at dances, the only problem, I can dance. I'm getting off track. Somehow he found out that I had a crush on him and things got weird. There were days where he wouldn't talk to me, and then others when everything would be the same. I was scared to talk to him. Prom came around and he went with my best friend in a group. I was originally his date since my friend set us up, but my anxiety got the best of me and I ducked out. I missed my one shot to starting something more then friends. He leaves for college in 3 months and I won't see him again. Should I just let my heart break, and never see him again. I really like him. And I think he likes me. I just don't have the courage to do anything.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
If you try to make a move now you would only have 3 month to form a strong relationship before he leave and you are forced to do the long distance thing.
let him go and move on.
in the future when you like a boy make a move. Time is never on your side. Strike first chance you get.
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So sorry to hear this. What it all boils down to though is that you totally lack self confidence. A lot of young people do at that age, same as it was for me, I lacked self confidence for a long time. You already had a date with him for prom but you backed out due to lack of self confidence. You may not think that is what the real issue is here but I've been there, done that. I know that all the problems in relationship in my past were almost all due to lack of self confidence. There could even be some lack of good self image. I wasn't ugly but for a long time, I felt I really did not measure up. However this wasn't due to comparing myself to other girls but feeling that myself as a whole, personality and all was not going to be interesting enough to ANY males to want to get involved with me. It can be subtle and a little of that was still left as I discovered after a divorce and was using a dating site to meet guys, this in my late forties. When the first real promising guy came along, I interpreted everything he wrote as him having a higher than average IQ. It was his use of words that had me thinking that being only a HS grad meant I wasn't smart enough for him. I am married to him now. So what changed my predicament even at late forties? I decided to confess my fear. Fear when confronted is same like a bully confronted, it acts so big and tough but if you hit back, it'll run away, just as a bully would. When I told him I liked lots about him but I was afraid that he would lose interest in me after some time due to my not being a college grad with all the knowledge and IQ that he seemed to have. He was astounded and said that in all his long talks with me, he found that I as a soul had incredible wisdom and wisdom can not be learned as text knowledge can be. In fact he was so impressed with my wisdom, saying until me, he'd never met another woman with this great a wisdom. What I feared was totally unfounded.
So my dear, what you need to do instead of giving in to fear is to fight back. It isn't just this one event in life but this fear can follow you your entire life and determine the outcome of how happy you will be in life. So even if you chickened out, said nothing and let your heart break as you stated, there will be dozens or more great disappointments in your life ahead if you do nothing to change and become a stronger person. No, it isn't easy at first to challenge yourself and do that which you have always put off, but it can be done. You call it courage, and yes, that is what I am saying is needed here. When you have one little success with finding courage, some miracle happens and that feeling piggy-backs into all the rest of areas where you may not feel so confident yet. You say you missed your shot. Is he dead, you certainly aren't and until you are dead, its not over and there are chances for things to change if its in the cosmic plans for your life. I always looked for excuses to explain away why I didn't do something and doing that long enough, I began to believe lots of them, even though my excuses were just a tactic to get myself to not feel bad about myself or take the blame myself. No one and nothing that I've read interfered in this situation where you had a crush on a guy. But someone did sabotage the whole situation, I think you know who if it wasn't another person. Take the blame and decide whether you are ready for a change. I've heard a phrase in song about taking a leap of fear. The actual phrase is "Take a leap of faith" Looking back, I realize that is impossible. When lacking courage to make a move, it isn't faith in a good outcome that helps us take that leap. It truly is a leap but one of fear. You are fearful, shaking, maybe sweaty with fear, etc as you contemplate doing something you want but lack courage to do. The only thing that will help you dear, is to crack through and break free of the fear that has you in its grip but doing something while you are still scared. I was scared as I confessed to the man who is now my husband. It sure was worth pushing through the fear. If I could do it, so can you. Go for it. Let me know how it goes. Basically what you do is contact him, and apologize for not having gone to prom with him and confess that you were scared the whole time, double thinking everything and right now you are facing your fears to actually have a real good conversation with him. You figure he knows you're still into him but you'd like to know how he feels, if he sees you more as a friend only or something more. Since he'll be away at school, you want to be able to confess now before he's moved to college. Good luck.
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